Humor V

Years ago, I got a Post-of-the-Month nomination from Moose for a two-word post.Pith pays.

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"It appears that many of you turn to Hebrew to escape the English...." -- Joseppi

It's a time traveller!

Tomato.

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"It appears that many of you turn to Hebrew to escape the English...." -- Joseppi

I was aware of that but "tomato" was what I thought. I suppose if I had thought "volkswagen", I might have thought twice but thinking twice is beside the point of the exercise, isn't it?I'm still not sure why I was expected to think "carrot". Does it have something to do with the number "1" resembling a carrot?

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"It appears that many of you turn to Hebrew to escape the English...." -- Joseppi

Where's the duct tape? How do you keep your ducts in a row?

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"It appears that many of you turn to Hebrew to escape the English...." -- Joseppi

I remember getting a telegram.
I remember when mail was delivered on Saurdays.
I remember when bread was delivered.

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"It appears that many of you turn to Hebrew to escape the English...." -- Joseppi

I remember (in 1977) buying gas for 50.9 cents a half gallon. The pumps only had two digits, so they couldn't charge 100.9 cents a gallon (foreshadowing Y2K).

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"It appears that many of you turn to Hebrew to escape the English...." -- Joseppi

Children in a Sunday School class were asked to draw a picture of their favourite Bible story. One young fellow drew a car with a man and woman in the back seat. The teacher was a little puzzled and asked, "What Bible story is this?"The boy replied, "That's Adam and Eve being driven from the Garden of Eden.""I see," the teacher said, "And who's this in the front seat?""That's Pontius, the pilot."

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"I'm Rory Bellows, I tell you! And I got a lot of corroborating evidence... over here... by the throttle!"

That belongs in somebody's signature.

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"I'm Rory Bellows, I tell you! And I got a lot of corroborating evidence... over here... by the throttle!"

In a thread far far away, dwise1 wrote:

quote:

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While hiking in the mountains, a man falls off the trail, grabs a branch to stop himself, and finds himself hanging over an enormous drop with no escape in sight. He prays for deliverance from his plight and a voice from Heaven tells him, "Have faith and let go." He ponders this for a moment and shouts back, "Anybody else up there? I'd like a second opinion!" [msg=-14,-15123,-33]

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When I saw, "He prays for deliverance...." I immediately thought of Duelling Banjos.Be careful what you pray for. Your prayers may be answered.

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"I'm Rory Bellows, I tell you! And I got a lot of corroborating evidence... over here... by the throttle!"

Now that reminds me of Last Tango in Paris.

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"I'm Rory Bellows, I tell you! And I got a lot of corroborating evidence... over here... by the throttle!"

Mary Magdalene's middle name was Jane.

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"I'm Rory Bellows, I tell you! And I got a lot of corroborating evidence... over here... by the throttle!"

At Christmas time, we all like feeling Mary
And given half a chance, we jump for Joy
But in the end, the lovely Christmas Carol
Is everybody's favourite Christmas toy.

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"I'm Rory Bellows, I tell you! And I got a lot of corroborating evidence... over here... by the throttle!"

Here's a snapshot I took out my window: I call it "January in Saskatchewan". I think it would look nice in the Louvre.

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"I'm Rory Bellows, I tell you! And I got a lot of corroborating evidence... over here... by the throttle!"

There have been times when I couldn't see the house across the street (about 100 feet).

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"I'm Rory Bellows, I tell you! And I got a lot of corroborating evidence... over here... by the throttle!"