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Author Topic:   Tim Minchin's "Storm"
Briterican
Member (Idle past 3949 days)
Posts: 340
Joined: 05-29-2008


(1)
Message 1 of 19 (611820)
04-11-2011 11:38 AM


Forgive me if it's a repost. This is most definitely an enjoyable way to spend 10 minutes of your life Let the pigeonhole form!

  
Briterican
Member (Idle past 3949 days)
Posts: 340
Joined: 05-29-2008


(2)
Message 2 of 19 (611867)
04-11-2011 4:44 PM


The actual poem
Storm - by Tim Minchin
Inner North London, top floor flat
All white walls, white carpet, white cat,
Rice Paper partitions
Modern art and ambition
The host’s a physician,
Lovely bloke, has his own practice
His girlfriend’s an actress
An old mate from home
And they’re always great fun.
So to dinner we’ve come.
The fifth guest is an unknown,
The hosts have just thrown
Us together for a favor
because this girl’s just arrived from Australia
And has moved to North London
And she’s the sister of someone
Or has some connection.
As we make introductions
I’m struck by her beauty
She’s irrefutably fair
With dark eyes and dark hair
But as she sits
I admit I’m a little bit wary
because I notice the tip of the wing of a fairy
Tattooed on that popular area
Just above the derrire
And when she says I’m Sagittarian
I confess a pigeonhole starts to form
And is immediately filled with pigeon
When she says her name is Storm.
Chatter is initially bright and light-hearted
But it’s not long before Storm gets started:
You can’t know anything,
Knowledge is merely opinion
She opines, over her Cabernet Sauvignon
Vis--vis,
Some un-hippily
Empirical comment by me
Not a good start I think
We’re only on pre-dinner drinks
And across the room, my wife
Widens her eyes
Silently begs me, Be Nice
A matrimonial warning
Not worth ignoring
So I resist the urge to ask Storm
Whether knowledge is so loose-weave
Of a morning
When deciding whether to leave
Her apartment by the front door
Or a window on the second floor.
The food is delicious and Storm,
Whilst avoiding all meat
Happily sits and eats
While the good doctor, slightly pissedly
Holds court on some anachronistic aspect of medical history
When Storm suddenly she insists
But the human body is a mystery!
Science just falls in a hole
When it tries to explain the the nature of the soul.
My hostess throws me a glance
She, like my wife, knows there’s a chance
That I’ll be off on one of my rants
But my lips are sealed.
I just want to enjoy my meal
And although Storm is starting to get my goat
I have no intention of rocking the boat,
Although it’s becoming a bit of a wrestle
Because -- like her meteorological namesake -
Storm has no such concerns for our vessel:
Pharmaceutical companies are the enemy
They promote drug dependency
At the cost of the natural remedies
That are all our bodies need
They are immoral and driven by greed.
Why take drugs
When herbs can solve it?
Why use chemicals
When homeopathic solvents
Can resolve it?
It’s time we all return-to-live
With natural medical alternatives.
And try as hard as I like,
A small crack appears
In my diplomacy-dike.
By definition, I begin
Alternative Medicine, I continue
Has either not been proved to work,
Or been proved not to work.
You know what they call alternative medicine
That’s been proved to work?
Medicine.
So you don’t believe
In ANY Natural remedies?
On the contrary actually:
Before we came to tea,
I took a natural remedy
Derived from the bark of a willow tree
A painkiller that’s virtually side-effect free
It’s got a weird name,
Darling, what was it again?
Masprin?
Basprin?
Asprin!
Which I paid about a buck for
Down at my local drugstore.
The debate briefly abates
As our hosts collects plates
but as they return with desserts
Storm pertly asserts,
Shakespeare said it first:
There are more things in heaven and earth
Than exist in your philosophy
Science is just how we’re trained to look at reality,
It can’t explain love or spirituality.
How does science explain psychics?
Auras; the afterlife; the power of prayer?
I’m becoming aware
That I’m staring,
I’m like a rabbit suddenly trapped
In the blinding headlights of vacuous crap.
Maybe it’s the Hamlet she just mis-quothed
Or the eighth glass of wine I just quaffed
But my diplomacy dike groans
And the arsehole held back by its stones
Can be held back no more:
Look , Storm, I don’t mean to bore you
But there’s no such thing as an aura!
Reading Auras is like reading minds
Or star-signs or tea-leaves or meridian lines
These people aren’t plying a skill,
They are either lying or mentally ill.
Same goes for those who claim to hear God’s demands
And Spiritual healers who think they have magic hands.
By the way,
Why is it OK
For people to pretend they can talk to the dead?
Is it not totally fucked in the head
Lying to some crying woman whose child has died
And telling her you’re in touch with the other side?
That’s just fundamentally sick
Do we need to clarify that there’s no such thing as a psychic?
What, are we fucking 2?
Do we actually think that Horton Heard a Who?
Do we still think that Santa brings us gifts?
That Michael Jackson hasn’t had facelifts?
Are we still so stunned by circus tricks
That we think that the dead would
Wanna talk to pricks
Like John Edward?
Storm to her credit despite my derision
Keeps firing off clichs with startling precision
Like a sniper using bollocks for ammunition
You’re so sure of your position
But you’re just closed-minded
I think you’ll find
Your faith in Science and Tests
Is just as blind
As the faith of any fundamentalist
Hm that’s a good point, let me think for a bit
Oh wait, my mistake, it’s absolute bullshit.
Science adjusts it’s beliefs based on what’s observed
Faith is the denial of observation so that Belief can be preserved.
If you show me
That, say, homeopathy works,
Then I will change my mind
I’ll spin on a fucking dime
I’ll be embarrassed as hell,
But I will run through the streets yelling
It’s a miracle! Take physics and bin it!
Water has memory!
And while it’s memory of a long lost drop of onion juice is Infinite
It somehow forgets all the poo it’s had in it!
You show me that it works and how it works
And when I’ve recovered from the shock
I will take a compass and carve Fancy That on the side of my cock.
Everyone’s just staring at me now,
But I’m pretty pissed and I’ve dug this far down,
So I figure, in for penny, in for a pound:
Life is full of mysteries, yeah,
But there are answers out there
And they won’t be found
By people sitting around
Looking serious
And saying isn’t life mysterious?
Let’s sit here and hope
Let’s call up the fucking Pope
Let’s go watch Oprah
Interview Deepak Chopra
If you’re going to watch tele, you should watch Scooby Doo.
That show was so cool
because every time there’s a church with a ghoul
Or a ghost in a school
They looked beneath the mask and what was inside?
The fucking janitor or the dude who runs the water-slide.
Throughout history
Every mystery
EVER solved has turned out to be
Not Magic.
Does the idea that there might be truth
Frighten you?
Does the idea that one afternoon
On Wiki-fucking-pedia might enlighten you
Frighten you?
Does the notion that there may not be a supernatural
So blow your hippy noodle
That you would rather just stand in the fog
Of your inability to Google?
Isn’t this enough?
Just this world?
Just this beautiful, complex
Wonderfully unfathomable world?
How does it so fail to hold our attention
That we have to diminish it with the invention
Of cheap, man-made Myths and Monsters?
If you’re so into Shakespeare
Lend me your ear:
To gild refined gold, to paint the lily,
To throw perfume on the violet is just fucking silly
Or something like that.
Or what about Satchmo?!
I see trees of Green,
Red roses too,
And fine, if you wish to
Glorify Krishna and Vishnu
In a post-colonial, condescending
Bottled-up and labeled kind of way
That’s ok.
But here’s what gives me a hard-on:
I am a tiny, insignificant, ignorant lump of carbon.
I have one life, and it is short
And unimportant
But thanks to recent scientific advances
I get to live twice as long as my great great great great uncles and auntses.
Twice as long to live this life of mine
Twice as long to love this wife of mine
Twice as many years of friends and wine
Of sharing curries and getting shitty
With good-looking hippies
With fairies on their spines
And butterflies on their titties.
And if perchance I have offended
Think but this and all is mended:
We’d as well be 10 minutes back in time,
For all the chance you’ll change your mind.

Replies to this message:
 Message 3 by fearandloathing, posted 04-11-2011 5:38 PM Briterican has not replied
 Message 4 by Jon, posted 04-11-2011 8:12 PM Briterican has replied

  
fearandloathing
Member (Idle past 4145 days)
Posts: 990
From: Burlington, NC, USA
Joined: 02-24-2011


Message 3 of 19 (611872)
04-11-2011 5:38 PM
Reply to: Message 2 by Briterican
04-11-2011 4:44 PM


Re: The actual poem
I love this, I just put it on Face Book. Thanks for sharing

"I hate to advocate the use of drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they always worked for me." - Hunter S. Thompson
Ad astra per aspera

This message is a reply to:
 Message 2 by Briterican, posted 04-11-2011 4:44 PM Briterican has not replied

  
Jon
Inactive Member


Message 4 of 19 (611878)
04-11-2011 8:12 PM
Reply to: Message 2 by Briterican
04-11-2011 4:44 PM


Re: The actual poem
I don't get it.

Love your enemies!

This message is a reply to:
 Message 2 by Briterican, posted 04-11-2011 4:44 PM Briterican has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 5 by Briterican, posted 04-12-2011 2:58 AM Jon has replied

  
Briterican
Member (Idle past 3949 days)
Posts: 340
Joined: 05-29-2008


Message 5 of 19 (611904)
04-12-2011 2:58 AM
Reply to: Message 4 by Jon
04-11-2011 8:12 PM


Re: The actual poem
jon writes:
I don't get it.
Awwww, shame. Perhaps Teletubbies is more on par with your intellect? I'd recommend that if you didn't get this.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 4 by Jon, posted 04-11-2011 8:12 PM Jon has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 7 by Jon, posted 04-12-2011 10:02 AM Briterican has replied

  
Dr Jack
Member
Posts: 3514
From: Immigrant in the land of Deutsch
Joined: 07-14-2003
Member Rating: 8.7


Message 6 of 19 (611923)
04-12-2011 8:03 AM


Tim Minchin is great.

  
Jon
Inactive Member


Message 7 of 19 (611939)
04-12-2011 10:02 AM
Reply to: Message 5 by Briterican
04-12-2011 2:58 AM


Re: The actual poem
Awwww, shame. Perhaps Teletubbies is more on par with your intellect? I'd recommend that if you didn't get this.
Huh? A cartoon man raging on with the same old worn out fundie empiricist arguments for epistemological absolutism is meant to be 'intellectual' and not down-right ridiculous?
I certainly don't see the value in it... at all.

Love your enemies!

This message is a reply to:
 Message 5 by Briterican, posted 04-12-2011 2:58 AM Briterican has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 8 by Dr Jack, posted 04-12-2011 10:24 AM Jon has replied
 Message 12 by Briterican, posted 04-12-2011 1:09 PM Jon has seen this message but not replied
 Message 19 by Modulous, posted 04-17-2011 9:52 AM Jon has seen this message but not replied

  
Dr Jack
Member
Posts: 3514
From: Immigrant in the land of Deutsch
Joined: 07-14-2003
Member Rating: 8.7


Message 8 of 19 (611940)
04-12-2011 10:24 AM
Reply to: Message 7 by Jon
04-12-2011 10:02 AM


Re: The actual poem
Jon writes:
Huh? A cartoon man raging on with the same old worn out fundie empiricist arguments for epistemological absolutism is meant to be 'intellectual' and not down-right ridiculous?
I certainly don't see the value in it... at all.
Cartoon man? Tim Minchin isn't a "cartoon man"; he's a British comedian that specialises in funny songs based around rationalist viewpoints. Such as If I Didn't Have You.
The value is that it's funny, and mocks hippy reality denying viewpoints.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 7 by Jon, posted 04-12-2011 10:02 AM Jon has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 9 by Jon, posted 04-12-2011 10:39 AM Dr Jack has replied
 Message 13 by Briterican, posted 04-12-2011 1:12 PM Dr Jack has not replied

  
Jon
Inactive Member


Message 9 of 19 (611942)
04-12-2011 10:39 AM
Reply to: Message 8 by Dr Jack
04-12-2011 10:24 AM


Re: The actual poem
The value is that it's funny
It was humorous.
Probably not much more than an episode of teletubbies, though.
Jon

Love your enemies!

This message is a reply to:
 Message 8 by Dr Jack, posted 04-12-2011 10:24 AM Dr Jack has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 10 by Dr Jack, posted 04-12-2011 10:51 AM Jon has replied

  
Dr Jack
Member
Posts: 3514
From: Immigrant in the land of Deutsch
Joined: 07-14-2003
Member Rating: 8.7


Message 10 of 19 (611944)
04-12-2011 10:51 AM
Reply to: Message 9 by Jon
04-12-2011 10:39 AM


Re: The actual poem
I actually think one of the funniest parts of it is the pre-amble which is omitted from the animation, see the first 50 seconds.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 9 by Jon, posted 04-12-2011 10:39 AM Jon has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 11 by Jon, posted 04-12-2011 12:58 PM Dr Jack has not replied

  
Jon
Inactive Member


Message 11 of 19 (611966)
04-12-2011 12:58 PM
Reply to: Message 10 by Dr Jack
04-12-2011 10:51 AM


Re: The actual poem
I actually think one of the funniest parts of it is the pre-amble which is omitted from the animation, see the first 50 seconds.
Now that wasn't bad. Where are his shoes?

Love your enemies!

This message is a reply to:
 Message 10 by Dr Jack, posted 04-12-2011 10:51 AM Dr Jack has not replied

  
Briterican
Member (Idle past 3949 days)
Posts: 340
Joined: 05-29-2008


(1)
Message 12 of 19 (611972)
04-12-2011 1:09 PM
Reply to: Message 7 by Jon
04-12-2011 10:02 AM


Re: The actual poem
Jon writes:
I certainly don't see the value in it... at all.
Fair enough. Clearly others do.
Tim Minchin is one of the most amazing piano talents I've ever seen... take his Israeli-Palestinian Peace Anthem for example.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3UO6YlkYNJQ&playnext=1&li...

This message is a reply to:
 Message 7 by Jon, posted 04-12-2011 10:02 AM Jon has seen this message but not replied

  
Briterican
Member (Idle past 3949 days)
Posts: 340
Joined: 05-29-2008


Message 13 of 19 (611973)
04-12-2011 1:12 PM
Reply to: Message 8 by Dr Jack
04-12-2011 10:24 AM


UK Born, Aussie national
Mr Jack writes:
Cartoon man? Tim Minchin isn't a "cartoon man"; he's a British comedian
He was born in the UK but he's an Australian national. Either way, he's amazing.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 8 by Dr Jack, posted 04-12-2011 10:24 AM Dr Jack has not replied

  
Briterican
Member (Idle past 3949 days)
Posts: 340
Joined: 05-29-2008


(1)
Message 14 of 19 (611975)
04-12-2011 1:28 PM


Member rating is bollocks
By the way "member rating" is complete rubbish lol.
Jon decides to be a smart ass and say "I don't get it", so I reply that maybe teletubbies is more his cup of tea (we're in Coffee House by the way...) and now my member rating is down from 4 to 3.8.
Lame lol.
Edited by Briterican, : No reason given.

Replies to this message:
 Message 15 by xongsmith, posted 04-12-2011 4:51 PM Briterican has seen this message but not replied

  
xongsmith
Member
Posts: 2578
From: massachusetts US
Joined: 01-01-2009
Member Rating: 6.8


Message 15 of 19 (612001)
04-12-2011 4:51 PM
Reply to: Message 14 by Briterican
04-12-2011 1:28 PM


Re: Member rating is bollocks
Briterican writes:
By the way "member rating" is complete rubbish lol.
Jon decides to be a smart ass and say "I don't get it", so I reply that maybe teletubbies is more his cup of tea (we're in Coffee House by the way...) and now my member rating is down from 4 to 3.8.
Lame lol.
Think of it as visual stellar magnitude.
"STELLA!!!!!!!!!!!"

- xongsmith, 5.7d

This message is a reply to:
 Message 14 by Briterican, posted 04-12-2011 1:28 PM Briterican has seen this message but not replied

Replies to this message:
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