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Author | Topic: A Farewell | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
BMG83 Junior Member (Idle past 2919 days) Posts: 1 Joined:
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Hello.
I've frequented this site for quite some time. I created my account when I wasabout 18 years old. I used the name Infixion, then changed it to BMG04, if I remember correctly. I didn't post very often, for my ability to debate was wanting, and my well of knowledge from which to draw and construct arguments, observations and insights was shallow and dry (The irony of wearing the name 'Infixion', at the time, went unnoticed). So, I found myself in the audience more often than not, watching some build their arguemnts while others examine and point out its flaws. What I found most important about my joining this site, however, was in instilling a desireto improve my ability to reason, as well as to pursue new and exciting subjects of inquiry. For these reasons I wanted to thank Percy and the EVC posters for placing a passion within me to learn and improve. This urge towards perpetual improvement and self-cultivation was reinforced in college, and expressed, although dissimilarly, by Hegel and Neitzsche as Bildung. I write this brief but heartfelt gratitude because I fear my life may be coming to an abruptend. I'm afraid that I have cancer. The primary tumor is situated at the back of my head, and has since metastatized to the front of my face, my nose, forehead, eyes, and lip. I believe it has also moved into my intestines, for a pain in my abdomen is exacerbating, and increases when I eat anything. My WBC is dropping, and my strength and appetite is deteriorating. Doctors refuse to help me. They're adament in their beliefs. Most of us know why, but maydiffer on the strength of those beliefs. Many of you have never seen nor ever will - and I hope you never will - a doctor's face that is bright red, smirking, and betraying a mind brimming with insidious intentions. I'd be lying if I said I was not afraid. To look, unblinking, into an eternal abysswhere regna il silenzio while standing at the tip of a crumbling ledge is terrifying. I'm only 32, turning 33 in April. Solace in the recollection of lived experiences brings more pain than promise of comfort, for the paths towards many experiences were obstructed; And not necessarily obscure or rare experiences, but quite overlooked and taken-for-granted ones, such as privacy, human bonding, and trustworthiness. Lastly, and most importantly, I would like to wish the best of luck and a long life toRAZD and Asgara, as well as any others who are stricken with cancer. Forgive the long post, and please do not respond. Farewell.
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Adminnemooseus Administrator Posts: 3974 Joined: |
Thread copied here from the A Farewell thread in the Proposed New Topics forum.
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Asgara Member (Idle past 2303 days) Posts: 1783 From: Wisconsin, USA Joined: |
I can't not respond. Peace and light my friend.
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AZPaul3 Member Posts: 8513 From: Phoenix Joined: Member Rating: 5.3
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Forgive the long post, and please do not respond. Forgiven. But I refuse to comply with the latter. You got to experience life. You got to live even if just for too short a time. Rail against the unfairness but revel in having had life. The rest of us will follow you shortly.
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jar Member (Idle past 395 days) Posts: 34026 From: Texas!! Joined: |
May your journey be always upward.
Anyone so limited that they can only spell a word one way is severely handicapped! |
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dwise1 Member Posts: 5930 Joined: Member Rating: 5.8 |
I do not remember whether we had ever conversed. If so, then I hope I was not too much of a jerk. I try not to be and I try to keep to the truth or at least to being truthful, though I do know that I fail far too often.
You are going where we all will also go eventually. Like all of us, you will take whatever comfort you can in whatever you believe or feel. Of course, you have already put all your affairs in order, so that you need not worry about such trivial things -- trivial to you, but important to those you love. I am 64 and I think about putting everything in order; it is sad that you must do the same at almost-33, but it is the same thing. When my mother died, she had been on life-support. When it came time to turn it off, we were all there, including our minister. Immediately afterwards, he remarked that the moment of death is when we all of us are alone. I disagree slightly. Many do indeed die alone, as my father had. But when we do die, we would want to be with the people whom we love and who love us. Because that love will help you, I truly believe.
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Adminnemooseus Administrator Posts: 3974 Joined:
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BMG's message index page is here:
EvC Forum: BMG Topic Index There is also a list of topics he started, but things are not set up that I can supply a direct link. If interested in such, please go here, at "Search by Messages or Thread Titles" select "Thread Titles", and enter BMG in the "Search by Author Name" field. I'm not going to do it now, but perhaps the BMG83 and BMG IDs should be merged. Adminnemooseus Edited by Adminnemooseus, : Very minor tweak.
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Hyroglyphx Inactive Member
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Lastly, and most importantly, I would like to wish the best of luck and a long life to RAZD and Asgara, as well as any others who are stricken with cancer. Forgive the long post, and please do not respond. I'm sorry, but humanity demands that I respond in some small way. You obviously do not want sympathy, so I won't placate you. All I have to say is, continue to fight. You still have the breath of life, so savor every last moment. By doing so, you can either go peacefully knowing you fought the good fight or make a remarkable recovery and will view life more beautifully than ever. In either event, in this moment, you are alive. So let it be. Best wishes to you."Reason obeys itself; and ignorance submits to whatever is dictated to it" -- Thomas Paine
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Phat Member Posts: 18262 From: Denver,Colorado USA Joined: Member Rating: 1.1 |
I too had to respond. Its ironic that I as a Christian can ignore so many online persons until they write a letter such as you have. I wont give you any long religious speech nor try and convert you if indeed this is your last farewell...all I can say is trust Jesus.
Thanks for sharing your pain with us as well as whatever you shared in less stressful days...ABe: WE have had several of our members die here...and its an odd human trait that I find myself more curious about someone who has departed...or in your case as someone who is faced with bleak facts. I pray that you live a long life regardless what any facts show...and that you find peace in your soul if it isn't there already. Edited by Phat, : thinking what to sayChance as a real force is a myth. It has no basis in reality and no place in scientific inquiry. For science and philosophy to continue to advance in knowledge, chance must be demythologized once and for all. —RC Sproul "A lie can travel half way around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes." —Mark Twain
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Faith  Suspended Member (Idle past 1445 days) Posts: 35298 From: Nevada, USA Joined: |
As others have said, there's no way not to respond despite your asking it. All I can do is sympathize, it sounds frightening beyond belief, and echo Phat's "trust Jesus" even though I know you've heard it and rejected it a million times. He's God, He hears you, He died for you, He will give you eternal life if you ask Him for it.
I wish you the best.
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Dogmafood Member (Idle past 349 days) Posts: 1815 From: Ontario Canada Joined: |
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New Cat's Eye Inactive Member |
Thank you.
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nwr Member Posts: 6408 From: Geneva, Illinois Joined: Member Rating: 5.1
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I'll say only that the cheer I gave is a way of sending my best wishes. It is not a "like" of your predicament. And I suspect that the same is true of the other cheers.
Thanks for posting.Fundamentalism - the anti-American, anti-Christian branch of American Christianity
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roxrkool Member (Idle past 989 days) Posts: 1497 From: Nevada Joined: |
Thank you, Infixion, for thinking so highly of the members here that you would feel compelled to share with us your difficult journey ahead.
There are no words of solace I can offer that would not sound silly and trite, as I am simply not that gifted, however, please know that your words were powerful and struck me deeply. Farwell.
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