Learning How to Pray After Finding God, from the perspective of a born again Catholic

I was raised Catholic and learned exactly how to walk the walk and talk the talk, and I even thought that I believed in God (now I guess I really didn't). Becoming a bachelor of science, I approached my personal religion in a systematic and analytical way. As a result, I was a spiritual child who never really found God. Scientifically, I couldn't come to any conclusion that He¹ wasn't there, but there are other people out there who are "bachelors of religion", and I trusted that they had to be on to something. I accepted that God exists, and went on about my life. Along the way I've argued here as a theist who know that we've evolved from apes and likes to nerd out on evolution and cosmology while trolling people who I know are incredibly wrong. Know that not everything I've said has been a position that I wholeheartedly agreed with, and realize that when you're not sure what the answer is, you can test an answer by using it in an argument with other people on the internet. That's like the whole philosophy of Wikipedia, ain't no shame in my game.Anyways, my life has been privileged, and I have been successful. And yet, I find myself unhappy because I am battling addiction. It turns out that trying to solve emotional problems with a scientific approach hasn't done me any good over the years, and I am not that well. I learned a new way to approach solving a problem, and when I applied that to my addiction problem, I started trying new solutions. One of them ended up being that whole "seeking a higher power" thing that 12-step refers to (I am not an advocate of 12-step, y'all just know what it is).I ended up turning to God (meaning what that means to me), and I got a response. It was non-verbal, but I knew what I had to do. I don't think that source of knowledge was myself. I was at a place where I didn't know what to do, and I didn't know where to go for help, so I said fuck it and opened myself up to God in the way that I thought I should (and have never done so before), and it hit me hard. I am now driven to change my life in a way I have never been before. Don't worry; I am taking this slowly and I have a lot of support, thankfully.I've seen my medical doctor and I am physically well, so I am seeking some counseling on my mental and emotional health. I haven't been to my first appointment yet (its soon), but there's a lot of work in preparing and I've realized that this place is a creative output for me that I enjoy and that it is also a valuable resource for discussion.I am also a fairly intelligent person who has learned that he may be experiencing being Bipolar, and that it is not impossible that I could need medication. If my experience with finding God was just my first manic attack, then that is exciting too - that means that I've been successful all these years while I've been depressed, so if I can get well then I should only do better, and I have a plan.Also, these two things are not necessarily mutually exclusive, so I don't feel like its one way or the other.I'm not yet convinced that drugs is the answer to my problem, and my doctor agrees that I should seek counseling first, which I'm doing. I'd also like to spend some of my time here arguing anonymously² on the internet with strangers who I can relate to, in an attempt to learn.For the purposes of this thread, I'd like to hear from other people who believe that they have found God, and learn more about what their experiences have been like for them. I'm also using this place for therapy, because I've realize how much I like to write and I think this is good for me. If you want to talk that side of it, feel free to reply as well.I haven't really learned how to pray yet, and by that I mean in a way that I find value³, so I don't. Friends in RL are telling me that I'll figure it out. Anybody here want to help me?How do you pray? How do you pray? I feel like it might just literally be "to relate to God".For the non-theists: Is there such a thing as "secular prayer"? I suppose that would be literally "to relate to the void". Would you think there would be any value in that sort of thing? What about for a person who has an addiction problem?.1: capitalizing words like he when I refer to God, and even the word god, is purely syntax for me, but I am doing it out of respect.
2: I do value my anonymity here so please respect that. If I simply refuse to talk about something, that is why.
3: Remember I was raised Catholic, I totally have a bunch of prayers memorized. I just don't really know how to use them in a way that helps me.

Thanks everyone for the replies, it's good stuff. I intend to reply to everyone who replied to me, but I'm a little busy in RL right now. This will prolly just end up being a slow moving thread, but I'll be participating gradually so please bare with me.

It's like with "The Muse". When I really allow myself to be creative and I get that inspiration, I can see how people think that's a source other than just your self. Personifying it as a female character helps us talk about it as a thing so we can relate to each other about it, but nobody really even knows if its a real other thing or not. So then it gets weird and some people think you might be crazy, so I don't really care about proving it. And if we have anonymity, it doesn't really matter what people think; we can still talk about it.Same goes with talking about God. We're each going to have some concept of what that means, and we're probably never going to be the same, so I think it helps to just take it for what it's worth, and do what you can to help.

I consider you one of my "anonomous internet friends". It's like an emotional feedback loop. I'm pretty sure it's not that bad, and I have tons of support. Yeah, I'm starting to practice meditation. Thanks for the tips, I'll let you know if I have questions.

Outside of what you believe the Bible says, is there anything you use to help in identifying that sources are from something other than God?ABE:Oh, thanks for the tips on the Lord's Prayer, I appreciate it.Edited by New Cat's Eye, : No reason given.

I haven't tried talking out loud yet; you think that helps?

Sure, I fit into that a bit. More so on the factual side than the objective one, though.Part of opening yourself to God has a lot to do with submission and letting go. It makes you very vulnerable and open to suggestion, so it's scary to think that I may simply be tricking myself into believing that it is God, and that's something I want to avoid.There is definitely "something there" that seems to not be me, but it's really hard to tell that it cannot simply be a product of the mind (there's a reason they say it takes faith). Whatever it is, it isn't the same things as my self that is sitting here typing to you right now. Maybe a different self, if it is a self, but it really doesn't seem that way.Kinda like I said with inspiration and "The Muse"... typically something-else is inspiring you, but you gotta let it happen and you can totally fight it off. I've also started practicing meditation, so there's that. It's really hard, but I like it. It follows the same patterns: you have to submit to it and just let it happen while being mindful of the distractions, and you could totally fight it. Thanks!Edited by New Cat's Eye, : typos and added clarity

Thanks for the reply. If for some reason I ever left The Catholic Church, I'd join an Anglican one.I appreciate the book recommendations, I'll add them to the list (I'm in the middle of two right now). I'll check out the youtube videos first, thanks for those too, and for seconding following The Lord's Prayer, I think that's good advice.

Yeah, my mind wanders a lot.Have you looked into mindfulness meditation? Just google it. It helps control the wondering mind, and I find it helping me to be able to pray better.

That literally has nothing to do with this topic. Sure, but if you really really want something then you are capable of convincing yourself of it. I don't want to trick myself into believe something that isn't true. Well, I'll liken it to meditation again. You cannot force yourself to meditate, you can only let go and allow yourself to fall into it. Heck, even trying to let go can prevent you from doing it. It's all about submission.It seems to me that finding God is very similar. As if God is waiting there ready to help you, but you have to seek Him and ask for it, i.e. you gotta want it. Geez, you seem so hostile. What's up with that? I'm using the phrase "born again" colloquially, but I feel like it's already happened. That is, my outlook is different now and everything seems just a bit different. Like, I actually like going to Church now, and my manners have changed. I disagree. I know devout Catholics who have truly found God and pray Catholic prayers. My mother is one of them, and she says the Rosary a lot.It's not that their version is dead, it's that their approach on how to do it was ineffective. As I said, unknowingly, they taught me how to walk the walk and talk the talk, and I totally got away with just going with the flow and saying I believed. Nobody ever questions your faith, so I blended right in and everything seemed fine. Unfortunately, I was doing it wrong and they didn't see it.Now that I've found God, all the stuff I learned over the years is seen in a new light, and it makes a lot more sense and seems to work just fine. Nah, I don't think so. I don't need to unlearn it, I need to learn how to actually utilize it. It's not that it's wrong, I've just been doing it the wrong way. I'm not buying it... religion is a system. It is dealing with things that none of us can actually know is real, so it has severe limitations. I think a lot of religion has to do with analogizing and metaphorizing rather than being attempts at literal factual descriptions. Jesus even had to use a lot of parables. I'm not drawn to praying for things for me. And I've read a ton of the Bible already, I know what it says. Perhaps a new outlook would change things, but I have enough on my plate right now. That's good advice, I intend for prayer to be a habitual part of my life. That's a false dichotomy. In the future, for this thread, keep it to yourself.If you keep talking about all this "accident" nonsense, then I'll just stop replying to you.

That sounds like what I've been learning about mindfulness in the difference between the thinking mind and the being mind. I've been running around with only the thinking mind forever now, and have just started learning how to tap into my being mind. It's very interesting and I'm finding it quite helpful Right, so just because you need to start using your being mind doesn't mean you have stop using your thinking mind sometimes too. You gotta use both! Yep, as with most things; balance is key.

Right on. I've never really cared about being that manly, but lately I've cared even less, and started caring more about what people might consider un-manly things. And I'm not afraid to admit it, nor am I ashamed. I'll have to watch that later... No shit!? I've been looking for a new(different) game to get into. I didn't like the old loot system in Diablo 3 so I quit playing it. This sound promising, I'm going to update it tonight.Are we already Battlenet friend (I can't remember)? I suppose I'll start a new guy... If I can't find you on Battlenet, I'll send you a PM here to let you know my nametag (I can't remeber that either).