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Author Topic:   How do you share new disbelief with friends and family?
Jazzns
Member (Idle past 3902 days)
Posts: 2657
From: A Better America
Joined: 07-23-2004


Message 1 of 2 (629548)
08-18-2011 1:02 PM


So a few weeks ago I summoned the courage to post my departure from faith over at: Jazzns' History of Belief
I got a little less feedback than I had hoped but hey, what are you gonna do, its the internet.
I wanted to bring a little bit of it back up though because of one issue. The one bit of advice I was hoping to get from some fellow recovering Christians on this board is what to do about my friends and family that are still in the faith. Most of my change has been very internal and very private. To them, this will seem like it is coming out of nowhere even though for me this has been an agonizing, multi-year long process.
From feedback I got from some of my close non-Christian friends, they said that I might write a different version of the letter that isn't as "harsh" and use that as a foil for bringing it up. My only problem with that is that I don't know of a way to say that I left the faith because I discovered that the Bible is full of crap without coming out and saying exactly that. Without that information, I feel that many of them will think that I am coming to this conclusion out of ignorance which is the exact opposite of where I feel it is derived.
I can see some definite potential for some strained relationships because of this so I don't want to do this the wrong way. I am okay without being all "RA RA!" about this but I don't want to this be a surprise someday because of other factors. My kids are growing up and I think there will be more and more pressure from family to be sending them to church, vacation bible school, etc. I don't mind the kids going to church actually but I certainly am not going to just let them be brain washed. My beliefs will not be a surprise to my kids otherwise I feel I would be irresponsible as a parent. Therefore this will eventually come out from them. I want to take care of this tactfully before then.
The thing that sucks the most about this is that I don't feel like anything should need to change. I don't feel like I am a substantially different person. I still have the same value for the relationships that I have always had. But I feel like I could really loose something merely for honestly expressing my beliefs.
I hope there are some folks out there who have had to deal with this. How do you walk up to someone you love and tell them that you have rejected their faith, and by all accounts according to their beliefs, you are now a heretic and destined for damnation?
Faith and Belief please.

If a nation expects to be ignorant and free, in a state of civilization, it expects what never was and never will be. --Thomas Jefferson

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Message 2 of 2 (629552)
08-18-2011 1:29 PM


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