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Author | Topic: Humor V | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||
Taz Member (Idle past 3314 days) Posts: 5069 From: Zerus Joined: |
the wise one writes: This is personal, but with all due respect, sports is pure bullshit. And while Westboro Baptist may accidentally come out on the "good guys' side", they are still seriously deluded. You mind making some sense? What the hell does this have to do with my previous post?
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dwise1 Member Posts: 5949 Joined: Member Rating: 5.5 |
Your message only served as a springboard. Feel free to disregard.
I was saying that those Westboro fools have for once picked a deserving target, even though for entirely the wrong reasons. I can only hope that the idiocy this Sunday will not adversely impact deserving programming like that nonsense last October did to The Simpsons. Football sucks!Linc, Shall We Dance? (the USA remake)
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Taz Member (Idle past 3314 days) Posts: 5069 From: Zerus Joined: |
What happened with the simpsons?
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dwise1 Member Posts: 5949 Joined: Member Rating: 5.5 |
They got bumped out of their timeslots. So that the DVR recorded frackin' stupid sports instead of quality TV.
And it's already happening this time around too. The news has been replaced. Un-frackin'-believable! PSLooking for something, anything, tolerable to watch, I found Desperado on a movie channel. Got a chance to see Salmita. But then another guitar-case-toting assassin showed up who looked too familiar. Desperado was a sequel to El Mariachi, a purely Mexican production starring Carlos Gallardo as the mariachi who's mistaken for a guitar-case-toting criminal and ends up having such a strong instinct for survival that he kills the killers sent out to stop him. Gallardo's role was taken by Antonio Banderas in Desperado, but he shows up as one of two guitar-case-toting killers named Campa. Edited by dwise1, : PS
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Taz Member (Idle past 3314 days) Posts: 5069 From: Zerus Joined: |
Smart, doesn't like to watch sports... sounds pretty homo to me.
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dwise1 Member Posts: 5949 Joined: Member Rating: 5.5 |
Yeah, right. Watching those hyper-padded tight-ass-fitting guys slapping each other on the butts is not gay? And getting to hold very close attractive women is gay?
{voice="Edward Blake, AKA 'The Comedian'"}Is that it? Is that what makes you hot? Those padded shoulders? Those tight butts? Slapping each other on the butt? Spending all your time with the guys and away from women?{/voice} Yeah, right. Keep chanting that mantra. Stay in deep denial. Stay in those close "not-homo" male ... whatever rituals. While I get all the chicks. Keep chanting your "I'm not really gay even though ... " mantra as long as you want. I hold women in my arms and you slap guys on the butt. Are you starting to see the pattern here? Sports is pure bullshit. "Sportsmanship" is pure bullshit and the height of hypocrisy; how you play the game means nothing whatsover, but rather that you win at any costs. I suffered through six fucking years of PE, so I know for a fact what the truth is! Having since then served nearly 35 years in the military, I wish so much that sports could follow the military model, but, no, training has absolutely no place in fucking stupid sports! Edited by dwise1, : No reason given.
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Taz Member (Idle past 3314 days) Posts: 5069 From: Zerus Joined: |
dwise1 writes:
Actually, based on my experience, in a social group if you see a guy that's getting all the attention from the women, chances are he's gay and they know it. Don't believe me? Keep your eyes open for those guys the next time you go to a social gathering.
getting to hold very close attractive women is gay?
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dwise1 Member Posts: 5949 Joined: Member Rating: 5.5 |
So then the way to prove that you're hetero is to avoid all contact with women? Curious logic, that.
I have a pet theory that sexual orientation is based on pheromones (which would make it inate and not a "choice"). Personally, I do not like the smell of other men, but the scent of women is mind-boggling. I guess that you like the scent of men. What does that tell us? In the meantime, back to the off-topic topic (this topic is, after all, about humor), sports is so mind-numbingly boring ... . I'm sorry, but I got so bored just then that I momentarily fell asleep. What kind of active mind could possibly stay engaged during such an assault? Edited by dwise1, : No reason given. Edited by dwise1, : No reason given.
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Taz Member (Idle past 3314 days) Posts: 5069 From: Zerus Joined: |
First of all, to stay on topic of this thread, you look funny haw haw.
dwise1 writes:
I've been told that you can't smell pheromones, or have I been lied to?
I have a pet theory that sexual orientation is based on pheromones (which would make it inate and not a "choice"). Personally, I do not like the smell of other men, but the scent of women is mind-boggling. I guess that you like the scent of men. What does that tell us?
If I ever like to hang out with women please shoot me. Anyone who's ever been married to a woman can tell you about the eternal struggle with what to watch on tv. I can a attest to this. Been married to one of them creatures for a number of years. This is why at our social events all the men are in a group and all the women are in their own seperate group with the occasional gay guy(s).
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Coragyps Member (Idle past 757 days) Posts: 5553 From: Snyder, Texas, USA Joined: |
WARNING*****Factual interruption of humor thread*****Warning
I've been told that you can't smell pheromones, or have I been lied to? You can't sense pheromones with your vomeronasal organ, like a mouse or bull can, because human vomeronasal organs aren't wired up to human brains. The jury is apparently still out on what role the human (and great ape) sense of smell plays in sexual interactions. But there is some role - boy urine and girl urine smell quite different. I've changed many diapers on each, and I've been a janitor on a college campus. I know. And I think sports are boring as hell - golf even worse than football. Cricket at least has the advantage of being completely fucking incomprehensible as well as boring....
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dwise1 Member Posts: 5949 Joined: Member Rating: 5.5 |
I was also married, for 28 years. Why are you married if you don't like to be around women?
And your social gatherings are nothing like I've ever seen. We would always mix, not segregate. Maybe if you had experienced normal social gatherings you would have developed more realistic views.
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Taz Member (Idle past 3314 days) Posts: 5069 From: Zerus Joined: |
dwise1 writes:
Damn, you're an old bastard. At least I still have some life left in me. Still waiting with anticipation for the big 30.
I was also married, for 28 years.
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onifre Member (Idle past 2973 days) Posts: 4854 From: Dark Side of the Moon Joined: |
This is why at our social events all the men are in a group and all the women are in their own seperate group with the occasional gay guy(s).
I would agree with you that married women are boring as fuck, and for the most part, single women I only want to fuck. So I'll listen to anything they say while pumping copious amounts of alcohol down their gullet in hopes that they'll eventually shut the fuck up about what classes they need to take next semester. Granted, I should seriously consider talking to women my own age, but they usually come with baggage that I couldn't handle - like kids, ex's who they complain about, the need to settle down. Yicks and yuck to all that shit. But sports rock, Dwise1. Wtf man? All that ballroom dancing has got you a bit light on the loafers? I'll give you that regular season games can get boring, but 1) there is nothing more exciting than watching a live game 2) the playoffs and finals, like the Super Bowl and the World Series, or my fav, the World Cup, can be a blast around people who share the same interest. A bar during the Cup, Super Bowl, NBA finals or the final game of the World Series is pure insanity. And there's lots of women there too!!! (talking shit and annoying the men, but hey, they're there at least) - Oni
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dwise1 Member Posts: 5949 Joined: Member Rating: 5.5 |
But sports rock, Dwise1. Wtf man? "rock"? As in "sinks like a rock"? Sports are mind-numbingly boring. Even you need to go to a bar and get drunk to deaden your own brains and whip each other into a frenzy in order for it to hold your interest. And I've known that sports are boring for almost my entire life, several decades before I started learning to dance. All it takes is a functioning brain.
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frako Member (Idle past 328 days) Posts: 2932 From: slovenija Joined: |
But sports rock, Dwise1. Wtf man? our football the Americans call it soccer a bunch of nitwits running after a ball. My favorite commentaries form players: "ova noc nija bio nas dan" (this night was not our day), "rad bi se zahvalil svojim starsem se posebej svoji mami in ocetu"(i would like to thank my parents, especially my mother and father), "nismo jih podcenjevali bili so samo bolsi kot smo pricakovali"(we did not underestimate them they where just better than we expected). Lol and theres more for all kinds of sports tough i do not like sports where you have to run around allot not my thing i did box between the ages of 15-18, I shot, still do sometimes and i still sometimes shoot the bow and arrow. tough i do not compeate in any anymore. Oh and chess i love to play chess.
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