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Author Topic:   Humor Strikes back
Faith 
Suspended Member (Idle past 1445 days)
Posts: 35298
From: Nevada, USA
Joined: 10-06-2001


Message 136 of 217 (271245)
12-21-2005 2:02 AM


Musical silliness
I guess this is the best place to drop this: Click on each participant in turn, from left to right -- or however you prefer.
Ngot gick fel - sidan finns inte
This message has been edited by Faith, 12-21-2005 02:03 AM

Replies to this message:
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kjsimons
Member
Posts: 821
From: Orlando,FL
Joined: 06-17-2003
Member Rating: 6.7


Message 137 of 217 (271284)
12-21-2005 8:59 AM


Consti Who tion!
Great sendup of O'Reilly and Fox News!
Page Not Found - Orlando Sentinel

Replies to this message:
 Message 139 by berberry, posted 12-21-2005 10:36 AM kjsimons has replied

  
berberry
Inactive Member


Message 138 of 217 (271289)
12-21-2005 9:12 AM
Reply to: Message 136 by Faith
12-21-2005 2:02 AM


Re: Musical silliness
That's hilarious, Faith! Thanks for a good laugh.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 136 by Faith, posted 12-21-2005 2:02 AM Faith has not replied

  
berberry
Inactive Member


Message 139 of 217 (271324)
12-21-2005 10:36 AM
Reply to: Message 137 by kjsimons
12-21-2005 8:59 AM


Re: Consti Who tion!
Thanks for that, kj. It reminded me of something I haven't read in years. I went searching a bit and found it: Gene Ziegler's What If Dr. Seuss Wrote Technical Manuals? It was written several years ago, so if you can remember what technical manuals were like about the time that the 486 and Pentium computers were popular this will mean even more to you. It's hilarious! My favorite part:
If a packet hits a pocket on a socket on a port,
And the bus is interrupted as a very last resort,
And the address of the memory makes your floppy disk abort,
Then the socket packet pocket has an error to report!
If your cursor finds a menu item followed by a dash,
And the double-clicking icon puts your window in the trash,
And your data is corrupted 'cause the index doesn't hash,
Then your situation's hopeless, and your system's gonna crash!
You can't say this? What a shame sir!
We'll find you another game sir.
If the label on the cable on the table at your house,
Says the network is connected to the button on your mouse,
But your packets want to tunnel on another protocol,
That's repeatedly rejected by the printer down the hall,
And your screen is all distorted by the side effects of gauss
So your icons in the window are as wavy as a souse,
Then you may as well reboot and go out with a bang,
'Cause as sure as I'm a poet, the sucker's gonna hang!

This message is a reply to:
 Message 137 by kjsimons, posted 12-21-2005 8:59 AM kjsimons has replied

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Son Goku
Inactive Member


Message 140 of 217 (271380)
12-21-2005 11:37 AM
Reply to: Message 136 by Faith
12-21-2005 2:02 AM


Re: Musical silliness
This link contains both factual and implied errors.
First, although horses do posses sufficiently powerful hind legs, it is unlikely that they would be able to stand as depicted in a jocular fashion.
Secondly, horses more than likely, do not posses any innate compositional ability or synchronisation skills. This renders the fact that they can sing harmoniously a unlikely assertion at best.
Finally, the fact that horses would attempt a barbershop quartet, even providing them with the intellectual capacity to do so, is considerably dubious, as they lack the social background to be fully aware of what is meant by barbershop.
All in all, a false representation of the equine community.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 136 by Faith, posted 12-21-2005 2:02 AM Faith has not replied

  
kjsimons
Member
Posts: 821
From: Orlando,FL
Joined: 06-17-2003
Member Rating: 6.7


Message 141 of 217 (271406)
12-21-2005 12:12 PM
Reply to: Message 139 by berberry
12-21-2005 10:36 AM


Re: Consti Who tion!
Haha that's priceless! Great link! I remember all too well what a pain the earlier pc's were. Especially if you were using an IBM clone and some off brand peripheral card. Some combinations of hw would never work and others required you to randomly swap cards in peripheral slots until they (hopefully) worked.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 139 by berberry, posted 12-21-2005 10:36 AM berberry has not replied

  
berberry
Inactive Member


Message 142 of 217 (271980)
12-23-2005 10:36 AM
Reply to: Message 135 by Omnivorous
12-20-2005 2:41 PM


Re: Gen-u-wine Christmas
I've got another one:
Jesus Saves! and you will too during our huge After-Christmas Sale at Stein Mart. Praise God at check-out and get an extra 5% off your order.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 135 by Omnivorous, posted 12-20-2005 2:41 PM Omnivorous has not replied

  
RAZD
Member (Idle past 1405 days)
Posts: 20714
From: the other end of the sidewalk
Joined: 03-14-2004


Message 143 of 217 (272559)
12-24-2005 6:53 PM


Dreamin ...
http://www.reuters.hu/card_dom/index_content.html
enjoy.

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macaroniandcheese 
Suspended Member (Idle past 3928 days)
Posts: 4258
Joined: 05-24-2004


Message 144 of 217 (273376)
12-27-2005 10:32 PM


okay so i felt like looking up cultwatch cause the spidey said something about it and you know about curiosity and cats.
the world religions page
said this
World religions are not cults, but cults are often based around them. (important note just in case.)
-and-
How does a person’s religion effect them?
Since their religion dictates their world view, their understanding of reality, it is used as a set of base rules to help formulate their decisions.
For example:
A Christian would not be keen to be involved with a séance; because she believes that there is a God, that God wrote the Bible, and since the Bible commands that people avoid necromancy (communication with the dead) she had better obey that command.
A Hindu may not want to eat beef since he believes cows are sacred and he would generate bad karma for his next life.
An Atheist or “Naturalist” may believe that there is nothing beyond the material realm, and finding this thought depressing she turns to alcohol, or some other form of escape to dull the pain of the “pointlessness of life”.
A Muslim may take a trip to Mecca, since he believes that the God of Islam has commanded every Muslim, who is able, to do this at least once in his lifetime.
i was caught off-guard by one of these. so i emailed them.
An Atheist or "Naturalist" may believe that there is nothing beyond the material realm, and finding this thought depressing she turns to alcohol, or some other form of escape to dull the pain of the "pointlessness of life".
this was on your world religions page. i find it amusing that this was listed along with the very noble goals of those of religious faith.
as a christian, i feel called to compassion. your name-calling does not follow this. perhaps you should say something like the following:
because the atheist or 'naturalist' does not believe in a god or an after life, he may try to live this life as morally and fulfilling as possible knowing it is his only opportunity to do so.
it is fine for you to say later that you think it does matter what one believes, but if you're going to list the hindu abstainance from beef-eating and islamic pilgrimages and christian abstainance from necromancy, you should establish a positive aspect of atheism. i assure you, there are plenty. like the lack of an angry and vengeful god which so many christians are stuck on. but then i'm not that kind of christian.
or you could forego all that and list off the negative aspects of hinduism or islam, too. you know. killing the infidels and sacrificing to khali and all that fun stuff. not that christians and jews are all that free of commands to kill the infidels and cast the heretic from their presence.
i thought it was funny.

“I asked for the vegetarian."
"Ah, yes, the vegetarian, yes! There we go, Mr. Hitler. There we go... Like a bit of wine? Thank you very much...you Nazi shithead!"

  
Theus
Inactive Member


Message 145 of 217 (273413)
12-28-2005 12:44 AM


So....
This year I decided to try something new and went to large groups to spend sabbath. As many of you out there may know, this is a great source for jokes...
Rabbi Yoseph is distressed by his son's occupation with the music of Marilyn Manson and disregard for his religion. So, in a desperate act, he sends his son off to Israel for the summer. Months go by, and finally Yoseph's son returns, but to his surprise is an ardent born-again Christian.
Frustrated, Rabbi Yoseph goes to Rabbi Steletsky's home. He sits down with Rabbi Steletsky, and tells him about sending his son to the holy land, and then having him come back a Christian. Rabbi Steletsky is very surprised, and says that "You know, the same thing happened to me. I sent my son to the land of his ancestors and he too returned a Christian."
Frustrated, and without answers both Rabbis then prayed to god to answer their questions. Finally, a bright light appears an an voice floats down from the Heavens.
"What has troubled my loyal servants so?"
"Well," say the Rabbis, "We send our sons to the holy land to be educated in the ways of our people, but they have both come back as Christians, why lord, why?"
God pauses for a moment, and finally anwers:
"You know, the same thing happened to me..."

Those that can make you believe absurdaties can make you commit atrocities - Voltaire

  
berberry
Inactive Member


Message 146 of 217 (274615)
01-01-2006 9:21 AM


Pearls Before Swine - Out of 'A's
This little series (available at Yahoo Comics) really cracked me up this week. I didn't think it was going to amount to much at first, the real payoff comes at the end:

Replies to this message:
 Message 147 by RAZD, posted 01-01-2006 10:08 AM berberry has replied

  
RAZD
Member (Idle past 1405 days)
Posts: 20714
From: the other end of the sidewalk
Joined: 03-14-2004


Message 147 of 217 (274622)
01-01-2006 10:08 AM
Reply to: Message 146 by berberry
01-01-2006 9:21 AM


Re: Pearls Before Swine - Out of 'A's
LOL
Ever read "The Wonderful 'O'" by James Thurber?
In his witty and provocative way, Thurber creates a land where the letter "o" has been removed from all words in a ploy to punish the townspeople for their noncooperation in helping the villains find the object of their quest.
Otto Ott, when asked his name could only stutter, and Ophelia Oliver disappeared from the haunts of men ...

Join the effort to unravel {AIDS\HIV} with Team EvC! (click)

we are limited in our ability to understand
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RebelAAmerican.Zen[Deist
... to learn ... to think ... to live ... to laugh ...
to share.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 146 by berberry, posted 01-01-2006 9:21 AM berberry has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 148 by berberry, posted 01-01-2006 6:03 PM RAZD has replied

  
berberry
Inactive Member


Message 148 of 217 (274741)
01-01-2006 6:03 PM
Reply to: Message 147 by RAZD
01-01-2006 10:08 AM


Re: Pearls Before Swine - Out of 'A's
RAZD writes me:
quote:
Ever read "The Wonderful 'O'" by James Thurber?
No, but it sounds like something I'd love. I think I've got the Thurber Carnival somewhere around, is it part of that?
I remember reading Walter Mitty years ago; I loved it. Thanks for the tip.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 147 by RAZD, posted 01-01-2006 10:08 AM RAZD has replied

Replies to this message:
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RAZD
Member (Idle past 1405 days)
Posts: 20714
From: the other end of the sidewalk
Joined: 03-14-2004


Message 149 of 217 (275047)
01-02-2006 4:04 PM
Reply to: Message 148 by berberry
01-01-2006 6:03 PM


Re: Pearls Before Swine - Out of 'A's
No, not in carnival, it is one of several "childrens" books he wrote.
Another, and my personal favorite is "The Thirteen Clocks" which has the golux and the todal in it, princes and princesses, and an evil duke.

Join the effort to unravel {AIDS\HIV} with Team EvC! (click)

we are limited in our ability to understand
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RebelAAmerican.Zen[Deist
... to learn ... to think ... to live ... to laugh ...
to share.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 148 by berberry, posted 01-01-2006 6:03 PM berberry has not replied

  
RAZD
Member (Idle past 1405 days)
Posts: 20714
From: the other end of the sidewalk
Joined: 03-14-2004


Message 150 of 217 (276533)
01-06-2006 9:52 PM


http://www.allhatnocattle.net/ernestine-nsa.jpg
LOL.

Join the effort to unravel {AIDS\HIV} with Team EvC! (click)

we are limited in our ability to understand
by our ability to understand
RebelAAmerican.Zen[Deist
... to learn ... to think ... to live ... to laugh ...
to share.

  
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