Humor Strikes back

Carico said here: I just cannot let this one go, this completely new insight has given me a brilliant idea.It is a well known fact that the ancestor is an endangered species. Most of them are dead, after all.
I suggest that we start a rigorous ancestor breeding programme. Once we have a healthy population of ancestors, we might try to release them in the wild.We might even try to cross-breed them with predecessors! That would of course involve a bit of bestiality, but if we could just manage to get rid of the gene for talking by a clever breeding strategy, nobody needs to know.I think Moorhead, MN USA would be a suitable place to start the world's first ancestor breeding farm. Lots of expertise there.

Please fill out this questionaire and we'll get back to you.1. Do you reproduce sexually or asexually? ¹2. Are you male, female or hermaphrodite?3. Are you a pure-bred ancestor?4. Do you lay eggs?4. Does ancestry run in your family?5. Do you object against incest?6. How about bestiality?7. Strangle sex?8. How many times a day must you be fed?9. Do you require a stable, a dark cave or underwater² sleeping quarters?10. How many legs do you have? ³____________________________ ¹If asexually, don't bother to continue. We'll keep you in our database though, in case we think of other interesting experiments.²Please indicate sweet water, salt water, or brackish.³When more than six, we refer you to our culinary division. We don't like creatures with more than six legs, except when steamed and served with lemon-caper mayonnaise.This message has been edited by Parasomnium, 09-Dec-2005 03:15 PM

Ah, references. Yes, excellent. Well, just one question really, and then it should be in the bag: those eggs you mentioned, can they erm... sort of, attest that they erm... got laid by you?

Questionaire evaluation.Subject: brennakimi_____________________ Subject may have to be drugged to induce reproduction. Further info required: nubile? (If yes, notify Omivorous.) Problem with understanding premise of ancestor breeding programme. Perhaps brain missing. (Note: may be useful in breeding out talking gene.) Notify kitchen. Nodule of brain after all? Incest no problem. Cesarean? Second thought, better not try large animals with this one. Note: chihuahua as roommate? Inexperienced. Note: book elephant house. Cancel elephant house, order extra semtex. Introduce to echidna.Overall conclusion: worth an experiment.

Sheep? Well, I never! Plural? That's wicked! That would amount to... polygamy!

Yes.José, meet brennakimi, brennakimi, this is José.José might look fragile, brenna, what with him trembling on his little legs an' all, but that's just fatigue. He's just had a rendez-vous with a Great Dane bitch.Careful, he might still be a little agitated. If you stroke him, stay away from the teeth.

José, ATTACK!

How did you like this one, Spidey?