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Author Topic:   humor II
Taz
Member (Idle past 1430 days)
Posts: 5069
From: Zerus
Joined: 07-18-2006


Message 150 of 310 (352432)
09-26-2006 4:34 PM


A usual day in the white house
George Bush's advisors are briefing him about the situations in Iraq, as usual. At the end of the briefing, Rumsfeld says, "By the way, 3 Brazilian soldiers died earlier today."

With that, Bush begins to panic and says repeatedly and frantically, "oh my god, oh my god, oh my god..." He then burries his face in his hands as his advisors look at each other wondering about the unusual behavior. Finally, Bush looks up and asks, "how many is a brazillion?"


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Taz
Member (Idle past 1430 days)
Posts: 5069
From: Zerus
Joined: 07-18-2006


Message 163 of 310 (355384)
10-09-2006 12:56 PM
Reply to: Message 162 by Dr Adequate
10-09-2006 5:42 AM


Re: Things Evolutionists Can't Explain
Are these for real or are they spoofs?
This message is a reply to:
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Taz
Member (Idle past 1430 days)
Posts: 5069
From: Zerus
Joined: 07-18-2006


Message 165 of 310 (355393)
10-09-2006 1:13 PM
Reply to: Message 164 by Coragyps
10-09-2006 1:05 PM


Re: Things Evolutionists Can't Explain
The rainbow one kinda made me doubt the apparent stupidity... but I guess I've been overestimating mankind.

On a different note, a quick google search popped up Fundies Say the Darnest Things website.


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Taz
Member (Idle past 1430 days)
Posts: 5069
From: Zerus
Joined: 07-18-2006


Message 199 of 310 (366172)
11-26-2006 9:49 PM
Reply to: Message 198 by Chiroptera
11-26-2006 2:26 PM


I'm sorry, may be I don't have a sense of humor... but are those suppose to be funny?


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Taz
Member (Idle past 1430 days)
Posts: 5069
From: Zerus
Joined: 07-18-2006


Message 209 of 310 (368427)
12-08-2006 11:23 AM


Bush's speech
Google Video

Bush finally expresses his thoughts truthfully.

Edited by gasby, : No reason given.


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Taz
Member (Idle past 1430 days)
Posts: 5069
From: Zerus
Joined: 07-18-2006


Message 211 of 310 (368827)
12-10-2006 2:18 PM
Reply to: Message 210 by Chiroptera
12-10-2006 2:12 PM


Re: God-Man in Tom the Dancing Bug
Chiro, without making an ass of myself again, could you explain why that's funny? :confused:


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Taz
Member (Idle past 1430 days)
Posts: 5069
From: Zerus
Joined: 07-18-2006


Message 216 of 310 (369039)
12-11-2006 2:34 PM
Reply to: Message 212 by Chiroptera
12-10-2006 2:25 PM


Re: God-Man in Tom the Dancing Bug
Oh no, don't get me wrong. I love your contributions. It's just that I grew up inside a cage so sometimes I require a little explanation to understand a joke. I'm slow.


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Taz
Member (Idle past 1430 days)
Posts: 5069
From: Zerus
Joined: 07-18-2006


Message 217 of 310 (369044)
12-11-2006 2:39 PM
Reply to: Message 213 by ramoss
12-11-2006 1:31 PM


Edited by gasby, : No reason given.


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Taz
Member (Idle past 1430 days)
Posts: 5069
From: Zerus
Joined: 07-18-2006


Message 222 of 310 (369141)
12-11-2006 7:38 PM
Reply to: Message 220 by Chiroptera
12-11-2006 7:29 PM


Re: God-Man in Tom the Dancing Bug
Here's the thing, I grew up fundy. I guess you'd have to be more than a former fundy to understand those jokes.

Anyway, don't worry about it. What can a bat do to a tazmanian devil?

On the subject, here's a joke I recently came across.

A Christmas Story for people having a bad day....

When four of Santa's elves got sick, and the trainee elves did not produce the toys as fast as the regular ones, Santa was beginning to feel the pressure of being behind schedule.

Then Mrs. Claus told Santa that her Mom was coming to visit. This stressed Santa even more.

When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two had jumped the fence and were out, heaven knows where. More stress.

Then when he began to load the sleigh one of the boards cracked, and the toy bag fell to the ground and scattered the toys.

So, frustrated, Santa went into the house for a cup of apple cider and a shot of rum. When he went to the cupboard he discovered that the elves had hidden the liquor, and there was nothing to drink. In his frustration he accidentally dropped the cider pot, and it broke into hundreds of little pieces all over the kitchen floor. He went to get the broom and found that mice had eaten the straw end of the broom.

Just then the doorbell rang, and irritable Santa trudged to the door. He opened the door and there was a little angel with a great big Christmas tree.

The angel said very cheerfully, "Merry Christmas, Santa. Isn't it a lovely day? I have a beautiful tree for you. Where would you like me to stick it?"

And so began the tradition of the little angel on top of the Christmas tree.

Edited by gasby, : No reason given.


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Taz
Member (Idle past 1430 days)
Posts: 5069
From: Zerus
Joined: 07-18-2006


Message 228 of 310 (369512)
12-13-2006 10:54 AM
Reply to: Message 226 by Dr Adequate
12-13-2006 6:42 AM


Re: Creationists Versus Gravity
OMFG!!!!!!

It's like... the dark ages all over again.


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Taz
Member (Idle past 1430 days)
Posts: 5069
From: Zerus
Joined: 07-18-2006


Message 236 of 310 (369908)
12-15-2006 12:57 PM
Reply to: Message 235 by New Cat's Eye
12-15-2006 12:43 PM


Re: Season Greetings
CS writes:

I think some leftwing nutjob bitched about getting wished a Merry Christmas from a greeter at Wal*Mart...


You forgot to include the part where Walmart got boycotted by right wing nutjobs for the christmas thing and again for being gay friendly. I don't recall the last time left wing nutjobs boycotted an organization for saying merry christmas.


George Absolutely Stupid Bush the Younger
This message is a reply to:
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Taz
Member (Idle past 1430 days)
Posts: 5069
From: Zerus
Joined: 07-18-2006


Message 304 of 310 (384315)
02-10-2007 9:33 PM
Reply to: Message 303 by Omnivorous
02-10-2007 9:07 PM


Re: Name a country starting with 'U'...
Have you heard about dihydrogen monoxide?
This message is a reply to:
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