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Author | Topic: How accurate is this email? | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
Hyroglyphx Inactive Member |
SEVENTEEN WAYS TO BE A GOOD LIBERAL
1. You have to be against capital punishment, but support abortion on demand. 2. You have to believe that businesses create oppression but governments create prosperity. 3. You have to believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding citizens are more of a threat than nuclear weapons technology in the hands of Iran , China and/or North Korea. 4. You have to believe that there was no art before federal funding. 5. You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by cyclical changes in the earth's climate and more affected by soccer moms driving SUVs. 6. You have to believe that gender roles are artificial, but being homosexual is natural. 7. You have to believe that the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of federal funding. 8. You have to believe that the same teacher who can't teach 4th-graders how to read is somehow qualified to teach those same kids about sex. 9. You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but PETA activists do. 10. You have to believe that self-esteem is more important than actually doing something that might merit it. 11. You have to believe the NRA is bad because it supports certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good because itsupports gutting certain parts of the Constitution. 12. You have to believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too high. 13. You have to believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinem are more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, George Washington, or Abraham Lincoln. 14. You have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas and set-asides are not. 15. You have to believe that the only reason socialism hasn't worked anywhere it's been tried is because the right people haven't been in charge. 16. You have to believe that homosexual parades displaying drag queens and transvestites should be constitutionally protected, and manger scenes at Christmas should be illegal. 17. You have to believe that this message is a part of a vast right-wing conspiracy. "A man can no more diminish God's glory by refusing to worship Him than a lunatic can put out the sun by scribbling the word, 'darkness' on the walls of his cell." -C.S. Lewis
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Percy Member Posts: 22508 From: New Hampshire Joined: Member Rating: 5.4 |
Did you want to provide attribution for this, or is it just sheer coincidence that this is already on the web?
AbE: Oh, wait, you got this in email, didn't you. See http://www.aboyandhiscomputer.com/Dem_Rep_compare.html. --Percy Edited by Percy, : More info.
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Omnivorous Member Posts: 3992 From: Adirondackia Joined: Member Rating: 7.5 |
I think this e-mail accurately typifies the sources and qualities of your political beliefs.
Is that what you wanted to know? Real things always push back. -William James Save lives! Click here!Join the World Community Grid with Team EvC! ---------------------------------------
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Hyroglyphx Inactive Member |
Did you want to provide attribution for this, or is it just sheer coincidence that this is already on the web? No, it isn't mine. That's why I entitled the thread, "How accurate is this email?" "A man can no more diminish God's glory by refusing to worship Him than a lunatic can put out the sun by scribbling the word, 'darkness' on the walls of his cell." -C.S. Lewis
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Dan Carroll Inactive Member |
You have to be against capital punishment, but support abortion on demand. Generally speaking, sure. What's your point?
You have to believe that businesses create oppression but governments create prosperity. Not really, no.
You have to believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding citizens are more of a threat than nuclear weapons technology in the hands of Iran , China and/or North Korea. Nope, not accurate. In fact, you'll probably hear most liberals say how stupid it was for Bush to invade Iraq, thus prompting Iran and North Korea to restart their nuclear programs.
You have to believe that there was no art before federal funding. No, just that more art is a good thing, so it should probably be funded.
You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by cyclical changes in the earth's climate and more affected by soccer moms driving SUVs. No. You realize that cyclical changes in the earth's climate are gonna happen, and therefore it's stupid to send them all out of whack by pumping noxious gases into the air.
You have to believe that gender roles are artificial, but being homosexual is natural. Sure. What's your point?
You have to believe that the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of federal funding. Nope. Just that blocking funding to the research of any disease hampers the ability to find a vaccine. Seems like common sense to me.
You have to believe that the same teacher who can't teach 4th-graders how to read is somehow qualified to teach those same kids about sex. Nope. You believe that we should pump money into the schools so we can effectively teach children to read. While they're there, it's probably a good idea for them to learn about sex.
You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but PETA activists do. It is crazy to assume that those who are crazy about the life of animals care more about nature than those who shoot them, I'll give you that.
You have to believe that self-esteem is more important than actually doing something that might merit it. Not really sure where that's even coming from, so no.
You have to believe the NRA is bad because it supports certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good because it supports gutting certain parts of the Constitution. Nope. In fact, although I think the NRA is a bunch of gun-obsessed weirdos, I do think that as long as the 2nd amendment is on the books, it should be followed.
You have to believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too high. Sure. I, for one, would rather my money be used for schools, and roads, and all sorts of things that will benefit me, than be pumped into building a bank manager's summer home. Wouldn't you?
You have to believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinem are more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, George Washington, or Abraham Lincoln. Again, not sure where that's coming from. Are there any liberals who hate the founding fathers? (Especially Thomas Jefferson? What?)
You have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas and set-asides are not. Aw, I can almost see the "straight white christian men are the ones who really have it rough" argument forming. When are you gonna get around to telling us about the time someone cracked your skull open, by the way?
You have to believe that the only reason socialism hasn't worked anywhere it's been tried is because the right people haven't been in charge. I would probably go ahead and disagree with any theory about socialism that doesn't get how socialism works.
You have to believe that homosexual parades displaying drag queens and transvestites should be constitutionally protected, and manger scenes at Christmas should be illegal. Nope. As has been explained to you over and over (and over and over) again, liberals don't think manger scenes should be illegal.
You have to believe that this message is a part of a vast right-wing conspiracy. Actually, I figured it came from a giggling twit at a keyboard. But whatever. Hope that helps. "I know some of you are going to say 'I did look it up, and that's not true.' That's 'cause you looked it up in a book. Next time, look it up in your gut." -Stephen Colbert
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NosyNed Member Posts: 9004 From: Canada Joined: |
The email is an accurate portrayal of the closed-minded bigots view of the world and those who disagree with him. Those who think, not for themselves, but think what they are told to think. Those who are black-and-whitests and not able to handle subtlety or complexity.
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Hyroglyphx Inactive Member |
I think this e-mail accurately typifies the sources and qualities of your political beliefs. Is that what you wanted to know? Sorry, I know its inflammatory. It was just so funny. "A man can no more diminish God's glory by refusing to worship Him than a lunatic can put out the sun by scribbling the word, 'darkness' on the walls of his cell." -C.S. Lewis
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NosyNed Member Posts: 9004 From: Canada Joined: |
It is also funny. It's too bad that it almost certainly not taken that way by the bigots that I described above.
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Omnivorous Member Posts: 3992 From: Adirondackia Joined: Member Rating: 7.5 |
Humor would have been better served by the full parody of both conservatives and liberals, accessible via Percy's link. In isolation, either half just sounds stupid.
Real things always push back. -William James Save lives! Click here!Join the World Community Grid with Team EvC! ---------------------------------------
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PaulK Member Posts: 17828 Joined: Member Rating: 2.6 |
I would have to say that the email is calculated to appeal to the prejudices of Americal conservatives.
I would say that on every point the "have to" is wrong. Some individual points areabsurd strawmen that you shouldn't even have to ask about ("4. You have to believe that there was no art before federal funding." - how stupid or bigoted would you have to be to consider that an accurate depiction of liberal beliefs ?) Many of the comparisons are inappropriate"12. You have to believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too high." Why is that a useful comparison ? Isn't the way that the Federal Government is building up the deficit economically risky ? Isn't it reasonable to suggest that raising taxes now might be a good idea ? What does that have to do with ATM fees ? It says more about conservatives than it does about liberals - and what it says isn't nice.
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Lithodid-Man Member (Idle past 2962 days) Posts: 504 From: Juneau, Alaska, USA Joined: |
What this email demonstrates clearly is the term 'liberal' as applied by NJ, dittoheads, and the like, is a complete strawman designed to give the very ignorant something to point at and despise. If you take time and look around you will find very few examples of the liberal as they are described herein.
As others have pointed out, this certainly says more about the authors and those who forward it than it does about liberal beliefs. It is kind of pathetic, really. Doctor Bashir: "Of all the stories you told me, which were true and which weren't?" Elim Garak: "My dear Doctor, they're all true" Doctor Bashir: "Even the lies?" Elim Garak: "Especially the lies"
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Chiroptera Inactive Member |
Doesn't this belong in the Humor III thread?
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PaulK Member Posts: 17828 Joined: Member Rating: 2.6 |
It's not even very good as a joke. It's working too hard to be nasty and confirm conservative prejudices.
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crashfrog Member (Idle past 1498 days) Posts: 19762 From: Silver Spring, MD Joined: |
I guess it'd be "funny because it's true", if any of those things were true.
Why is it that all the good comedians are liberals? That's what conservatives need to be asking themselves.
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Hyroglyphx Inactive Member |
quote: Generally speaking, sure. What's your point? That its ironic.
quote: Not really, no. Generally speaking that would seem to be the case.
you'll probably hear most liberals say how stupid it was for Bush to invade Iraq, thus prompting Iran and North Korea to restart their nuclear programs. You think that Iran and North Korea have been trying to get hold of nuclear weaponry because of the invasion of Iraq? I'm not seeing the correlation. Can you connect the dots for me?
quote: No, just that more art is a good thing, so it should probably be funded. By the Federal Government though?
You realize that cyclical changes in the earth's climate are gonna happen, and therefore it's stupid to send them all out of whack by pumping noxious gases into the air. Anthropogenic global warming is real. Its caused in part by carbon dioxide and methane gases. We should all stop breathing and eating beans in order to save the environment.
quote: Sure. What's your point? I think the point is that one doesn't make sense without the other. If gender roles are artificial then wouldn't that extend to homosexuality as well?
quote: Nope. Just that blocking funding to the research of any disease hampers the ability to find a vaccine. But there already is an exorbitant amount of funding. Every pharmaceutical company in the world has vested interests in finding a vaccine. That's beau coup bucks for them.
You believe that we should pump money into the schools so we can effectively teach children to read. While they're there, it's probably a good idea for them to learn about sex. Call me old fashion, but I think schools should be going to an actual education. Its the job of parents to teach their kids about sex, not some fruitloop that I didn't give permission to.
It is crazy to assume that those who are crazy about the life of animals care more about nature than those who shoot them, I'll give you that. I don't like sport hunters at all. I think its a pointless, machismo endeavor. However, I think PETA goes overboard. They love the muskrat more than they love their own children.
quote: Not really sure where that's even coming from, so no. I think the writer is poking fun at the celebration of mediocrity.
although I think the NRA is a bunch of gun-obsessed weirdos, I do think that as long as the 2nd amendment is on the books, it should be followed. I guess you have a point. The NRA might endorse a 50 caliber sniper rifle with depleted uranium rounds as a perfectly normal gun for home defense.
I, for one, would rather my money be used for schools, and roads, and all sorts of things that will benefit me, than be pumped into building a bank manager's summer home. That's not how it works.
Are there any liberals who hate the founding fathers? (Especially Thomas Jefferson? What?) No, its just a joke. The writer is probably wondering why Sanger and Steinem are more celebrated than people who have made actual contributions to society. Being uppity isn't exactly a coveted virtue.
quote: Aw, I can almost see the "straight white christian men are the ones who really have it rough" argument forming. When are you gonna get around to telling us about the time someone cracked your skull open, by the way? Excuse me? The time somebody cracked open my skull? I've never said anything like at all.
I would probably go ahead and disagree with any theory about socialism that doesn't get how socialism works. ..... okay.
As has been explained to you over and over (and over and over) again, liberals don't think manger scenes should be illegal. Just everything else associated with Jesus then? "A man can no more diminish God's glory by refusing to worship Him than a lunatic can put out the sun by scribbling the word, 'darkness' on the walls of his cell." -C.S. Lewis
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