Gravity does not exist

I'm tired of the creos being the only ones with groudbreaking scientific theories that disprove foundational ideas, so I'm going to grab myself a moment in the sun.My theory is that there is no gravity. Objects do not fall to the Earth because of gravity. I have discovered a fifth force, similar in some ways to electromagnatism in that it is invisible, but acts nonetheless on objects that have mass. It is a field generated by a previously unknown element at the center of the Earth. I have named this element Substantium, in honor of myself, its discoverer, and the force is called Subbity.Subbity is similar to the theorized force of gravity, which is why it has been unknown for so long. One distinguishing feature of Subbity is that it is present only in the Earth. Substantium does not exist anywhere else in the Universe, so only the Earth has Subbity.The more astute among you might point out that other objects in space, planets, moons, stars, etc, seem to have an attractive force, what scientists have assumed was gravity. However, that is not the case. Instead, these other bodies are nothing more than localized focal points of Subbity waves as they emanate from Earth. The more massive the object, the better job it does at focusing Subbity waves, so the more focal Subbity force it has.How, you might ask, can I demonstrate the existence of Substantium? Quite simply. Drop something. Did it fall to the ground? It was drawn to the Earth by Subbity waves generated by Substantium.One consequence of my theory of Subbity is that it restores the Earth to its rightful place at the center of the Universe. All objects revolve around the Earth, with Subbity waves holding them in their orbits. Thus, I expect creationists of every stripe to rush in to support my theory. I further expect all you evilutionists will either attack my theory with a vengeance that reveals your own insecurity in your beliefs, or you will be so dazzled by the brilliance of my theory that you will immediately adopt it and cast off the ridiculous notions you previously held.Is it Science?, pretty please.

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Those who would sacrifice an essential liberty for a temporary security will lose both, and deserve neither. -- Benjamin FranklinWe see monsters where science shows us windmills. -- Phat

It is substantiated every time something falls.I haven't yet actually obtained a sample of Substantium, but I'm looking for funding for my research program. Care to contribute?

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Those who would sacrifice an essential liberty for a temporary security will lose both, and deserve neither. -- Benjamin FranklinWe see monsters where science shows us windmills. -- Phat

A valid point. I appreciate your bringing that to my attention.I suspect that a small sample would not be enough to seriously alter the balance, but social responsiblity dictates that a great deal more research be done before even attempting such an endeavor.I may need research assistants and I'm impressed by your attention to detail. If you'd care to send me a resume of your accomplishments, I'll consider taking you on, as soon as I've been able to put together funding.

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Those who would sacrifice an essential liberty for a temporary security will lose both, and deserve neither. -- Benjamin FranklinWe see monsters where science shows us windmills. -- Phat

Technically, I have substituted a new force, Subbity, for an old one, gravity. So there are still only four.One prediction of my theory is that if it's correct, we would not be constantly dizzy because the Earth is not in fact spinning in space. We are not dizzy, therefore my theory is confirmed.Think of a Merry-Go-Round. You ride it as it spins, you get dizzy. Well, the Earth spins a whole lost faster than a Merry-Go-Round if the theory of gravity is correct, so we should all be stumbling around, unable to stand up straight. Obviously most of us are not constantly dizzy (with some notable exceptions) so not only is my theory confirmed, but gravity is falsified.I appreciate and welcome your challenges. My theory grows stronger with each challenge it withstands.

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Those who would sacrifice an essential liberty for a temporary security will lose both, and deserve neither. -- Benjamin FranklinWe see monsters where science shows us windmills. -- Phat

First of all, congratulations on the birth part! I hate to start out on an exclusionary note, but I think that's going to have to be a minimum requirement for any research assistant, and you pass with flying colors!I'm particularly impressed by your achievements from 1963-2006. I strongly suspect that my opponents might try a campaign to discredit my work, so someone with nothing in their past that could be used against me would be invaluable.I am somewhat concerned by your "recent addition." I wouldn't want someone to be working on their own pet theory while I am funding their efforts. I trust you will understand if I require you to turn over to me all rights to every thought you have during your tenure. Just send me a blank sheet of paper with your signature at the bottom and I'll fill in the appropriate waivers and etc.You may start work immediately, but until I have sufficient finding, I'm afraid it will have to be an unpaid position. Perhaps your first task would be fundraising. I'll leave that to your initiative so that I can devote my time to pure science.I must say, this thing is moving along quite nicely!

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Those who would sacrifice an essential liberty for a temporary security will lose both, and deserve neither. -- Benjamin FranklinWe see monsters where science shows us windmills. -- Phat

Well, keep that lil feller's resume handy. I understand there's going to be an oval office opening in the next year or two, he might have a shot at it. That's the kind of get up and stop attitude that will take you far in this organization! I like it! Got a nice ring to it. Nice idea, but as you mentioned, there are certain risks associated with bringing Substantium to the surface. Do you suppose we could convince 'em that it would work from the Earth's center without being split?

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Those who would sacrifice an essential liberty for a temporary security will lose both, and deserve neither. -- Benjamin FranklinWe see monsters where science shows us windmills. -- Phat

Unfortunately for your attempt to refute my observations, I stubbornly cling to them with faith that they will be vindicated.I strongly suspect you are either under-estimating or over-estimating something in your analysis. While I understand and appreciate the force of what you say, I am too wedded to my own brilliant conclusions to be moved.Spinning = dizzy. Not spinning = not dizzy. Therefore, we are not spinning. It's really much too simple to be undermined by apparently reasoned analysis that must have a mistake in it somewhere.

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Those who would sacrifice an essential liberty for a temporary security will lose both, and deserve neither. -- Benjamin FranklinWe see monsters where science shows us windmills. -- Phat

Quite right. Brilliant! Get right on it.

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Those who would sacrifice an essential liberty for a temporary security will lose both, and deserve neither. -- Benjamin FranklinWe see monsters where science shows us windmills. -- Phat

I'm really more of an ideas man, a big picture concept guy. Math was never my strong suit.Perhaps you'd be willing to help out with that? I'm sure that Parsomnium is well on the way to raising some funding, so I'd be able to pay you as soon as that starts rolling in.

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Those who would sacrifice an essential liberty for a temporary security will lose both, and deserve neither. -- Benjamin FranklinWe see monsters where science shows us windmills. -- Phat

Sir, I take offense at your tone!Mockery and ridicule is unbecoming to a member in good standing of an august institution such as E v. C. I welcome all serious challenges, but will have none of this.Clearly what you have said is nonsense and is intended to do no more than belittle my revolutionary idea. Even under the so-called theory of gravity, there are no gravitational forces at the center of the Earth. Thus, your suggestion not only irrationally ignores the body of evidence that I have presented in support of my proposal, it isn't even internally consistent.Consider yourself fortunate that this forum does not offer a venue for dueling, or I would call you out!You have been chastised.

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Those who would sacrifice an essential liberty for a temporary security will lose both, and deserve neither. -- Benjamin FranklinWe see monsters where science shows us windmills. -- Phat

In addition, I have had repeated problems posting.I suspect foul play. The scientific establishment is yet again trying to silence a maverick truth teller in order to preserve their place in the hierarchy.I shall not be silenced!!!

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Those who would sacrifice an essential liberty for a temporary security will lose both, and deserve neither. -- Benjamin FranklinWe see monsters where science shows us windmills. -- Phat

I think it's time to clarify terms so that we both understand what the other is talking about. When I said merry go round, I meant this: From your calculations, it appears you were talking about something like this: Putting aside for the time being the fact that mine is much more impressive looking, a much, much bigger picture, and has nice printing in it, you need to adjust for the fact that mine is at least ten times bigger than yours (talking about the merry go rounds here) so the calculations would be different.Or, looked at from your point of view, I have never been able to spend more than a minute or two on one of those tiny little spinners without feeling like I was going to toss two weeks worth of lunches. From that perspective, I would submit that 1% of that phenomenon would be easily discernable by the average person.Thus, it appears that your attempt to bolster your position has actually had the effect of strengthening mine.

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Those who would sacrifice an essential liberty for a temporary security will lose both, and deserve neither. -- Benjamin FranklinWe see monsters where science shows us windmills. -- Phat

Au contraire, mon frere. I get dizzy while on the silly thing.

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Those who would sacrifice an essential liberty for a temporary security will lose both, and deserve neither. -- Benjamin FranklinWe see monsters where science shows us windmills. -- Phat

My goodness! Isn't it exciting to be on the cusp of a scientific breakthrough! I'm so glad that you find this controversy as engrossing as I do and recognize the important scientific questions that it raises.If one were to spend only a couple of revolutions on such a merry go round, I wouldn't necessarily expect to that person to be dizzy, but we spend our whole lives there! I'd certainly expect to be dizzy after months or years on such a merry go round.Wow, my theory just keeps getting stronger and stronger!

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Those who would sacrifice an essential liberty for a temporary security will lose both, and deserve neither. -- Benjamin FranklinWe see monsters where science shows us windmills. -- Phat

Fantastic! I knew I had the right man for the job. (Well done on the plan B dodge, by the way.) You are hereby promoted to the position of Chief Unpaid Intern!Lesser minds might be discouraged by the seemingly small amount of funds raised, but I assume that 397,745,554,983,388,012.84 Pffrrts will buy a whole lot of Vmitic (Vmitian?) labor.I've been mulling over the problem of unbalancing the Universe if we bring the stuff to the surface, and I think I've got the solution. Have the diggers bring up small quantities, and if they start to feel the planet tipping or anything, they can discard some as they come up. Maybe they should bring parakeets down with them, just in case.

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Those who would sacrifice an essential liberty for a temporary security will lose both, and deserve neither. -- Benjamin FranklinWe see monsters where science shows us windmills. -- Phat