The philosophy behind The Twelve Steps

I have been a part of the group for only two months. I also see a counselor on a weekly basis and it is those sessions that I feel are also helping. As you may or may not know, I majored (although never graduated) in psychology twenty some years ago and have always found the topic somewhat fascinating.When talking with this counselor, I ask a lot of questions, receive some encouragement, some specific topics to think about, and am never given the solutions. He points out possible links in my thought process, but he never outright tells me the answer.I arrive at the answers on my own. Much of the insights that recently have come to light came about through Step 4. If you want, come into chat and talk briefly.

It depends on the addiction. If I were addicted to cigarettes, for example, there may be some clues in my past that predisposed me to such a need, but you are basically right in saying that it is a problem best dealt with in the present and future considerations.An addiction to people, (co-dependency) on the other hand would have definite links to past events and situations within ones life.

Welch never implied that the disorder was in helping others. Welch implied that the disorder was in paying too much attention to ourselves individually rather than collectively.

You may or may not have read my thread thus far, but I have been reading an excellent book on addiction from a Christian Counselor entitled Addictions:A Banquet In The Grave by Edward T. Welch.While some critics may assert that his obvious dependency on Christian dogma makes him an unlikely qualifier as an addictions counselor, I would strongly disagree. His dual model approach to an addiction emphasizes the classic AA position of powerlessness which implies strong physical or psychological dependency issues coupled with a Christian idolatry model which emphasizes individual choice and personal responsibility in overcoming the addiction. For a Christian, the obvious solution is God. (AA also emphasizes a Higher Power, but not as a necessary surrender of self.) Obviously in either case, we are given an awareness of our past coping mechanisms, many of which were instilled in us as children.When childhood and adult destructive patterns and emotional responses are re-examined in a rational manner, new insights can then be drawn which gives the addict tools with which to walk towards recovery.Welch, of course, emphasizes the allegiances of the heart. He asks this series of questions to his clients. Would any of you care to answer them?Questions That Reveal The Heart: (From Addictions: A Banquet In The Grave)What do you truly want?
What is your purpose in life?
What or whom do you really love?
When do you get most sad and depressed?
When do you get hopeless? (when you don't get what you want)
What do you get most excited about? What brings you the greatest pleasure?
What is your dream?
How would you like to be remembered?
What do you especially want to avoid?I know that I am not going to easily be able to honestly answer these questions without revealing some addictive patterns and objects of worship. (The idolatry factor)

edit post as it is no longer conducive to the discussion Edited by Phat, : see above

I finally finished step 4, which is thought my many 12 step afficienados as the crux of the entire program. Its funny, but I thought that once I examined my past and made a searching and fearless moral inventory, I would be well on my way to being cured!I have found some deep seated anxieties, however, and the next step is to confess my entire life history and my secret fears, sins, and hangups to someone I trust! I found a person that I can trust who will not judge me or gossip negatively about me, but I feel stupid and somewhat reluctant to share all of my past garbage!Of course I am in control of what I reveal, but I have a fear of being seen in a wrong light. Apparently this confession is supposed to be cleansing to the soul, but I am still apprehensive.

OK...so I went through the 12 steps and made a few changes in my life...but I have not been able to get past the idea of surrender. Interesting.

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One of the main objectives in REBT is to show the client that whenever unpleasant activating events occur in people's lives, they have a choice of making themselves feel healthily and self-helpingly sorry, disappointed, frustrated, and annoyed, or making themselves feel unhealthily and self-defeatingly horrified, terrified, panicked, depressed, self-hating, and self-pitying (Ellis, 2003).

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What I have been told in my group is that the people who don't recover have a problem with personal honesty...to themselves and to others.

It has been a couple of years now, and I have been through the 12 step program twice. I have some good insights into addictions and why they happen.

Obviously, if one were truly powerless, they wouldn't even be able to choose God! So there is a degree of will and self determination involved. Once an addiction becomes an addiction, rather than merely an annoying habit, it is virtually impossible to control it, however. I cannot choose to gamble just a little bit. Whenever I did, I soon found myself spending more and more and spiraling out of control again. I don't personally feel that I am powerless and alone in the world without a support group, largely because of my personal faith. For a non-religious person, empowerment is the same as accepting that God exists. IMHO Empowerment can mean being in touch with a super conscious mind and able to access the parts of ones brain not normally used! How would we be able to tell the difference between that and a claim that God changed my life?

Group support and personal willingness to be honest and share are the keys to success.The toughest steps are 4 and 5.

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4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

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5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being, the exact nature of our wrongs.

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Its hard to get real with yourself and its hard to get real with others, God notwithstanding. Edited by Thugpreacha, : No reason given.

You may be interested in this:

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Recovery Without God(©1999 World Service Office, Inc.)

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It seems that I've been searching all of my life for something to believe in. Finally, in 1982, after fifteen years of nonstop drug abuse, I crawled into the rooms of Narcotics Anonymous. Though I was barely recognizable as a human being, I found in those rooms the hope that had eluded me for so long.

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Upon receiving my first hug at my first NA meeting, I knew that I had come home. What I found especially appealing were the choices I had been given -- the choice to not use, just for today, and the choice to have a Higher Power of my own understanding. For the most part, not using just for today proved to be much easier than finding a Higher Power.

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Over the years in recovery, I tried many different gods: Jesus, Buddha, Saraswati, Vishnu, and countless others. But I found that trying to believe in an intangible and invisible being or force left me empty and longing for more.

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What worked for me in early recovery, as well as today, is using the group as a power greater than myself. Actually it is the unconditional love that I get from the group and members of NA that I believe is a Higher Power -- certainly greater than anything of which I'm capable alone.

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Does this mean that I pray or meditate to the group? Of course not. Prayer is simply a petition, and meditation merely reflecting -- it does not have to be directed to anything, anyone, or any deity in particular.

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How can I possibly have any purpose or meaning in my life without a god? I believe my purpose in life is to develop into the best me that I can be.

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Finally, with what do I maintain a conscious contact, and from where do I seek comfort, if not a god? Today I find comfort in knowing that I am living a healthy, good, clean life and that I am not harming others or myself. I can maintain a conscious contact by holding love close to my heart.

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I seek to do the right thing for the right reason. I attempt to move my life forward in a good, orderly direction, and I do my best to incorporate the principles of our steps, traditions, and concepts into each day, I stay close to the program by going to meetings and sharing with my sponsor and sponsees. Today I accept my humanity. I know I'm not perfect, just a perfect human being.

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My most significant spiritual awakening was when I realized that the power is in me. I cannot rely on a mythical being or force to do for me what I cannot do for myself, nor do I wish to. After a lifetime spent trying to be everything to everyone, I now know that it begins and ends with me. I have to do the footwork, I must make the effort, and I need to seek the solutions.

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As it states in It Works: How and Why, today I have the ability to "live with dignity, love myself and others, laugh, and find great joy and beauty in my surroundings." I believe that life is an adventure waiting for me to discover all of its intricacies, not something to dread. I embrace the life that NA has given me today, and in spite of all the pain, loss, grief, and fear that I've experienced over the years, I relish every waking moment. I love life today.

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I recently read something that, for me, says it all: "The meaning of life is to live a life of meaning." Today, with the help of NA, its principles, the friends I've made, and the people I've met along the way, I'm capable of living such a life.

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-- Anonymous

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I think that becoming the best that we can be is a noble goal. What happens, however, when one does not care about recovery? I went through such a phase. I figured that all I was doing was hurting myself...if anybody. I actually liked being addicted. I saw no harm in it.In light of this, my question is this: Is addiction always a bad thing?

Oh I very much agree. Religion is one of the main addictions as well.Addiction by definition is (dependence on)the mood altering state that helps an individual cope with pain and emotion.

I'm gonna bring this theory up since it is along the same topic guidelines.
People have been found to exhibit six basic stages of change that they cycle through in their attempts at recovery.
The stages of change are:

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1)Precontemplation (also known as Denial)--In the precontemplation stage, people are not thinking seriously about changing and are not interested in any kind of help. People in this stage tend to defend their current bad habit(s) and do not feel it is a problem. They may be defensive in the face of other people’s efforts to pressure them to quit.

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2) Contemplation--In the contemplation stage people are more aware of the personal consequences of their bad habit and they spend time thinking about their problem. Although they are able to consider the possibility of changing, they tend to be ambivalent about it.

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3) Preparation/Determination--In the preparation/determination stage, people have made a commitment to make a change. Their motivation for changing is reflected by statements such as: “I’ve got to do something about this ” this is serious. Something has to change. What can I do?”

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4) Action/Willpower--This is the stage where people believe they have the ability to change their behavior and are actively involved in taking steps to change their bad behavior by using a variety of different techniques.

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This is the shortest of all the stages. The amount of time people spend in action varies. It generally lasts about 6 months, but it can literally be as short as one hour! This is a stage when people most depend on their own willpower. They are making overt efforts to quit or change the behavior and are at greatest risk for relapse.

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5) Maintenance--Maintenance involves being able to successfully avoid any temptations to return to the bad habit. The goal of the maintenance stage is to maintain the new status quo. People in this stage tend to remind themselves of how much progress they have made.

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People in maintenance constantly reformulate the rules of their lives and are acquiring new skills to deal with life and avoid relapse. They are able to anticipate the situations in which a relapse could occur and prepare coping strategies in advance.

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6) Relapse --Along the way to permanent cessation or stable reduction of a bad habit, most people experience relapse. In fact, it is much more common to have at least one relapse than not. Relapse is often accompanied by feelings of discouragement and seeing oneself as a failure.

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While relapse can be discouraging, the majority of people who successfully quit do not follow a straight path to a life time free of self-destructive bad habits. Rather, they cycle through the five stages several times before achieving a stable life style change.

I am coming to see the 12 step process in a new light recently.Lets review Step One: (According to Celebrate: Recovery )
1. We admitted we were powerless over our addictions and compulsive behaviors. That our
lives had become unmanageable.

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I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do
what is good, but I cannot carry it out. (Romans 7:18)It used to be that I thought that "being powerless" mean't that I lacked the willpower to quit on my own and that I was powerless over something which I had no control over. Recently, I realized that this is an excuse and is only partially true. While certain deeply ingrained habits are hard to break, they can be broken. The biggest part of the first step is in wanting to change.
Celebrate: Recovery wants to be a means to introduce people to the addiction known as Jesus. Rational Recovery seeks to empower people to realize that they can change without the need for any religion apart from belief in oneself.The Stages Of Change Model that I brought up in the preceding post shows the factual stages that an individuals mindset is at.Bottom Line: Many people never really want to change. They stubbornly and persistently gravitate towards their addictions rather than the solutions.Any program can and will work only once an individual wants to change and is brought to a place where they see the need for change in their life. Without that seemingly obvious realization, no magical formula, theory or Sky Daddy will ever be able to help them.I once heard this, ironically, from a Christian: The Human Will is the most powerful active mental force in the universe. Even God won't override it.

I STILL believe that the 12 step process can work, but I don't believe that it is the only way to go, nor can it work without ones cooperation. I have concluded two basic things:

People have to want to change.

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Awareness happens slowly. It may take years to uncover the events of our past that we either don't understand, have purposefully hidden from ourselves, or never remembered.