In various forums where fundamentalist Christians face (or think they're facing) atheists, one of them will inevitably say, "atheism is a belief", to which atheists sometimes respond with, "If atheism is a belief then not collecting stamps is a hobby" or "...bald is a hair color."
I got a good chuckle out of these the first times I heard them. So I searched for more, and solicited other forum-goers for suggestions, and I tried to come up with some of my own. I built this list (below). I'd like to see what punch lines you all can come up with. If you have new ones, or can suggest revisions to ones in the list, or think ones should be struck from the list, please respond.
Not collecting stamps is a hobby.
Bald is a hair color.
Water is a flavor of soup.
Off is a TV channel.
Ignorance is a field of expertise.
Starvation is a food group.
Death is an alternative lifestyle.
Blindness is an optical illusion.
"Go away!" is a pick-up line.
Virginity is a method of reproduction.
Barefoot is a kind of footwear.
Silence is a noise.
Paralysis is a dance.
Homelessness is a real estate holding.
Unconsciousness is a train of thought.
Dry-mouth is a drinking problem.
Taxidermy is veterinary care.
Counting to zero is a mathematical exercise.
Being broke is an accounting problem.
Naked is an outfit.
Missing the boat is a sea voyage.
Indifference is a way to show you care.
Sleeping is an exercise regimen.
Creationism is a science.