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Author Topic:   Loony Of The Week
RAZD
Member
Posts: 19865
From: the other end of the sidewalk
Joined: 03-14-2004
Member Rating: 5.6


Message 16 of 552 (717894)
02-02-2014 7:49 PM
Reply to: Message 15 by nwr
02-02-2014 7:42 PM


Re: From the Loony Archive
To poe or not to poe ... the poe deer.


we are limited in our ability to understand
by our ability to understand
Rebel American Zen Deist
... to learn ... to think ... to live ... to laugh ...
to share.


Join the effort to solve medical problems, AIDS/HIV, Cancer and more with Team EvC! (click)

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roxrkool
Member (Idle past 1059 days)
Posts: 1493
From: Nevada
Joined: 03-23-2003


Message 17 of 552 (719713)
02-16-2014 11:38 PM


Are Militant Atheists Using Chemtrails to Poison the Angels in Heaven?
Surely one of the stupidest websites on the planet. Or the greatest hoax on the internet.

SOURCE: Hard Dawn.com -- Because Morning in American Won't Be Easy

Note: The original article has links.

quote:

Are Militant Atheists Using Chemtrails to Poison the Angels in Heaven?

Posted on Jul 8, 2013 - 8:09pm by Stephenson Billings

---snip---

Chemtrails are the aerial spraying trails left by large aircraft, both commercial and federal, that are not associated with farming. Millions of images of these sky dispersals can be found on the internet. You will see thick plumes of dense whiteness ejected from the backs of jetliners with purposeful squirts. They are not continuous, but rather sporadic when planes reach a particular altitude. When such substances are released, they become hyper-heated in the atmosphere to attain a canopy-like distribution above targeted regions. Leaked images of these chemical containers in the bodies of large-sized aircraft regularly surface on the internet, underscoring the veracity of these claims.

The American public has never quite grasped the purpose of all this spraying. Officials in the Obama administration have long refused to even talk about these efforts, though some have suggested that super spy Edward Snowden may leak details of this widespread project if forced against the wall by the international community. As we have seen with other government programs, the ultimate result here is not likely to be a beneficial one.

In various online communities there has been vigorous debate about what chemtrails actually mean. Some believe they spread barium as a highly-sensitive electromagnetic missile defense system. Others postulate they contain compounds that attack our blood cells and ultimately reduce populations, much like the fluoridation of our water supplies. The rise in disease and other unexplained medical phenomena does strangely coincide with the popularization of chemtrails.

Yet another theory that has been gaining traction and deserves serious consideration is that Americas massive science-industrial complex is attempting a most dangerous experiment. Since Lyndon Johnsons presidency, we have seen a grave movement towards science-based strategic thinking in all forms of national policy. Whole swathes of government have been taken over by academic PhDs with an intense obsession with scientism. From the National Science Board to the Department of Education, from NASA to the National Institute of Standards, a powerful cadre of elite intellectuals is seizing control. A common thread amongst these activist bureaucrats is a love of science over God.

Links to Radical Atheist Movement

President George W. Bush famously fought against the scientists entrenched in his administration. At many points they promoted evolution theory and global warming over good old-fashioned common sense. They tried to uproot Christianity in our schools through activist judges. And while President Bush fought the good fight, he ultimately did not win the battle. The long line of anti-theists ruling the inner halls of power since Lyndon Johnson remained in control.

So what is at the heart of this secret society of globalist atheism? One of their most significant concerns is the power of Faith. They despise the Glory of Jesus and the hope that He brings to countless Americans. The atheists are so insanely dedicated to their obscene cult they will try just about anything to destroy every remnant of Christian Love on this earth. As this sickening obsession was wed to advances in aerial spraying technology in the last century, one can surmise the evil compound that resulted. In this formula, it seems quite logical that the atheists next step would be to attempt the widespread murder of Jesuss very Heavenly Agents of Love.

Angels. They are much more than a Christian bedtime story. They are much more than the sweet flutterings in the ears of believers. Angels are quite literally the factory workers of faith. They are tireless and everywhere. They accomplish innumerable feats, from minor pangs of guilt to the throbbing passions of love. The angels are there to guide us, to inspire us and, ultimately, to remind us of our obligation to Jesus. The fly through the air at His beckoning. They are gentle and ever willing. We would be far less human and humane were it not for the angels. And that is exactly why atheists fear the power of angels.

Atheists shake with contempt at the thought of love and decency. Their whole lives are dedicated to nothingness, to the gaping void of pain that nihilism defines. Indeed, atheists love pain. They love pain in their sexual rituals, in their drug addictions and in their secret globalist power schemes. Why do we have war? Its the atheists who spread contempt of God and invite such reckless notions of communism and Islam.

Will Atheistic Science Annihilate Love and Prayer?

As secret atheist scientists in government pursue their goals of undermining Jesus in America, it only stands to reason that they would take their battle to the skies. The aerial dogfight is likely a vicious one. Who knows what advances they have made since the days of DDT and Agent Orange. Yet fight on they do, every single day! Our heavens are coated in a thick aerosol haze of spiritual hate and this nations faith is sinking.

In our lifetime, the United States has been bombarded by supposedly natural disasters and terrorist attacks. Religion is at an all time low, while sodomy and perversion are at epic heights. Clearly the overlap of these symptoms with the widespread usage of chemtrails is more than just a coincidence. Clearly the astonishing rise of militant atheism in America must factor in. So what is the ultimate answer to the mystery of the chemtrails? Have Heavens angels forsaken us for such an offensive maneuver? Or are they actually losing, dying off in plumes of jetliner butchery? Surely Americas atheists in the great halls of government are asking these very same questions.


Edited by roxrkool, : No reason given.

Edited by roxrkool, : No reason given.


Replies to this message:
 Message 18 by hooah212002, posted 02-16-2014 11:58 PM roxrkool has responded
 Message 19 by AZPaul3, posted 02-17-2014 6:51 AM roxrkool has not yet responded

    
hooah212002
Member
Posts: 3183
Joined: 08-12-2009


Message 18 of 552 (719714)
02-16-2014 11:58 PM
Reply to: Message 17 by roxrkool
02-16-2014 11:38 PM


Re: Are Militant Atheists Using Chemtrails to Poison the Angels in Heaven?
Or the greatest hoax on the internet.

'Tis a poe, I'm afraid.

Satire, Parody and the Dangers of Internet Comedy

(I can't remember how to do linky shit with this sofware and I'm too drunk to give a fuck about re-learning)

I am also pretty sure I have seen this site before on other atheism related places and it was identified as satire.

::edit::
There is even a subreddit of the site and it seems like the conclusion is that of satire (oh look, I learned)

Edited by hooah212002, : No reason given.

Edited by hooah212002, : No reason given.

Edited by hooah212002, : preview is your friend. use it. dumbass me.


"Science is interesting, and if you don't agree you can fuck off." -Dawkins

This message is a reply to:
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AZPaul3
Member
Posts: 4081
From: Phoenix
Joined: 11-06-2006
Member Rating: 3.6


Message 19 of 552 (719726)
02-17-2014 6:51 AM
Reply to: Message 17 by roxrkool
02-16-2014 11:38 PM


Re: Are Militant Atheists Using Chemtrails to Poison the Angels in Heaven?
Or the greatest hoax on the internet.

Read again the site's title then look at their page banner.

The articles on atheism and on evolution are exceptional.

Some of my favorites are here and here.

Very well done indeed.

Edited by AZPaul3, : add


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roxrkool
Member (Idle past 1059 days)
Posts: 1493
From: Nevada
Joined: 03-23-2003


Message 20 of 552 (719760)
02-17-2014 4:58 PM


If satire, it's the best on the internet!
My gut was that it was fake (NO ONE could be that stupid... could they???), but I couldn't' say with 100% certainty. Either way, it's the most awesome site ever.

Unfortunately, the original post no longer belongs in the Loony of the Week thread, but perhaps a Genius of the Week thread.

Edited by roxrkool, : No reason given.


    
roxrkool
Member (Idle past 1059 days)
Posts: 1493
From: Nevada
Joined: 03-23-2003


Message 21 of 552 (719761)
02-17-2014 5:01 PM
Reply to: Message 18 by hooah212002
02-16-2014 11:58 PM


Re: Are Militant Atheists Using Chemtrails to Poison the Angels in Heaven?
Excellent! I've never heard of it before, but it's pure genius.
This message is a reply to:
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Minnemooseus
Member
Posts: 3723
From: Duluth, Minnesota, U.S. (West end of Lake Superior)
Joined: 11-11-2001
Member Rating: 3.5


(1)
Message 22 of 552 (719763)
02-17-2014 6:03 PM


Ray Martinez made the "Encyclopedia of American Loons" list
http://americanloons.blogspot.com/...2/918-ray-martinez.html

quote:
Ray Martinez is a notorious internet kook who describes himself as an Old Earth Young Biosphere Protestant Evangelical Paulinist, and has been known to infest discussions e.g. at talk.origins and various creationist webpages. He is also an erstwhile Conservapedia editor, but apparently ran into some problems with the other editors there.

Martinez main things are the idea that the Bible is innerrant, that the Great Pyramid is a physical representation of the Bible, and that Atlantis exists in the Atlantic Ocean since its existence is proven by the fact that eels return to the Atlantic to spawn. To critics of his views on evolution, his common response is that he is on the verge of publishing a paper that will demolish Darwinism. The verge has lasted for the main part of a decade by now, but at least it will, according to Martnez, answer all their doubts.

Since Martinezs can sometimes come across as dubiously coherent somewhat hard to understand, a superb Ray Martinez Dictionary has been made available for our benefit.

Diagnosis: Internet kook. Probably harmless.


Go to the source page for the links not preserved in the above quote.

The one comment so far:

quote:
Aww. You overlooked what I consider his most endearing feature. He also calls himself a "species immutablist", which means that he rejects even the "micro-evolution" that most other creationists are forced to admit happen. As a result, he spends almost as much time attacking other creationists as "evolutionists" as he does those who actually support modern evolutionary theory.

In other words, Ray M. has a really good thing going. Having decided that he is the only True Christian out there, he doesn't have to share the spotlight with anyone.


Moose


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Diomedes
Member
Posts: 861
From: Central Florida, USA
Joined: 09-13-2013
Member Rating: 3.2


(4)
Message 23 of 552 (719790)
02-18-2014 10:04 AM
Reply to: Message 22 by Minnemooseus
02-17-2014 6:03 PM


Playing with Snakes
http://abcnews.go.com/...costal-pastor-dies-snake-bite/story

quote:
The "snake handling" pastor of a small Pentecostal church in Kentucky died after being bitten by a rattlesnake during a weekend church service.

Jamie Coots, the pastor of the Full Gospel Tabernacle in Jesus Name in Middlesboro, Ky., was handling a rattlesnake during a service when he was bitten on his right hand Saturday night. But when the ambulance arrived at 8:30 p.m., the EMS team found that Coots had gone home, according to a statement from the Middlesboro Police Department.

Middlesboro Police Chief Jeff Sharpe told ABC News that, according to people at the church, Coots verbally refused treatment at the church. He said Coots was unconscious when he got to his house. When the ambulance crew arrived at Coots' home, his wife Linda Coots signed a form declining medical treatment, police said.


Ironic that those who rally so vigorously against the Theory of Evolution seem to be most likely to succumb to Natural Selection.


This message is a reply to:
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Replies to this message:
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1.61803
Member
Posts: 2838
From: Lone Star State USA
Joined: 02-19-2004
Member Rating: 5.7


Message 24 of 552 (719793)
02-18-2014 10:26 AM
Reply to: Message 23 by Diomedes
02-18-2014 10:04 AM


Re: Playing with Snakes
Diomedes writes:

Ironic that those who rally so vigorously against the Theory of Evolution seem to be most likely to succumb to Natural Selection.

Except they tend to pass on the dumbass gene well into breeding age and hence ensure a new generation of prodigy.

Edited by 1.61803, : replaced word.


"You were not there for the beginning. You will not be there for the end. Your knowledge of what is going on can only be superficial and relative" William S. Burroughs

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Diomedes
Member
Posts: 861
From: Central Florida, USA
Joined: 09-13-2013
Member Rating: 3.2


(3)
Message 25 of 552 (719821)
02-18-2014 12:44 PM
Reply to: Message 24 by 1.61803
02-18-2014 10:26 AM


Re: Playing with Snakes
Except they tend to pass on the dumbass gene well into breeding age and hence ensure a new generation of prodigy.

Don't you mean 'in-breeding age'?


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Pollux
Member
Posts: 241
Joined: 11-13-2011


Message 26 of 552 (719841)
02-18-2014 4:40 PM
Reply to: Message 23 by Diomedes
02-18-2014 10:04 AM


Re: Playing with Snakes
The further irony is that the verse they rely on for handling snakes, Mark 16:18, is not in the earliest manuscripts, which finish at vs 8.
I wonder what Faith's take is on this?
This message is a reply to:
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Replies to this message:
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Diomedes
Member
Posts: 861
From: Central Florida, USA
Joined: 09-13-2013
Member Rating: 3.2


(1)
Message 27 of 552 (719853)
02-18-2014 5:31 PM
Reply to: Message 26 by Pollux
02-18-2014 4:40 PM


Re: Playing with Snakes
The further irony is that the verse they rely on for handling snakes, Mark 16:18, is not in the earliest manuscripts, which finish at vs 8.

Indeed. Ultimately, I remember this being a discussion topic in Bible study when I was young and I recall the youth pastor always referring to this passage as being merely metaphorical. A bit of a throwback to the notion of the Serpent being Satan in the Garden of Eden. But like many passages, not meant to be taken literally.


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Dr Adequate
Member
Posts: 16095
Joined: 07-20-2006


(1)
Message 28 of 552 (722043)
03-14-2014 3:31 PM


This weeks loony has irrefutable proof that Michelle Obama is a man. It's a good start, but that is actually the least crazy thing on the website.

What is it with loonies and typography? Do they actually think: "Hey, my message will be that much more convincing if I arbitrarily put this paragraph in purple?"


  
Faith
Member
Posts: 31603
From: Nevada, USA
Joined: 10-06-2001
Member Rating: 1.1


Message 29 of 552 (722045)
03-14-2014 3:44 PM
Reply to: Message 26 by Pollux
02-18-2014 4:40 PM


Re: Playing with Snakes
I wonder what Faith's take is on this?

Snake handling is a ridiculous way to validate the text about handling vipers. That one was validated anyway when Paul was bitten by the viper and they thought he was dead, but he only shook it off into the fire. That whole passage at the end of Mark is fulfilled in the acts of the apostles. Whether it was meant to apply beyond that generation is not clear.

As for the passage itself being left out of the earliest manuscripts, otherwise often styled the "oldest and best," that's one of the biggest frauds perpetrated on the Church in all of history. Those "oldest" manuscripts were either forgeries or were tampered with by an early gnostic cult, corrupted by errors and rewritings, and this was recognized by the Church until the Revision committee that came out with the Revision of 1881 decided to enshrine them as the oldest and best. Well, the seminaries bought the fraud and today's scholarship is based on the fraudulent manuscripts. Quite a coup for the enemies of the Bible.

Edited by Faith, : No reason given.

Edited by Faith, : No reason given.


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Taq
Member
Posts: 7864
Joined: 03-06-2009
Member Rating: 4.3


(1)
Message 30 of 552 (722050)
03-14-2014 5:36 PM
Reply to: Message 4 by nwr
01-26-2014 9:40 PM


Re: Encyclopedia of American Loons
On a similar topic, there is actually a web site:

Encyclopedia of American Loons

Ray Martinez does have his own entry:

http://americanloons.blogspot.com/...2/918-ray-martinez.html


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