Humour VIII

Q: What's the best way to run a small business in Saskatchewan?A: Start with a big one.

Adam and Eve were hanging out in the Garden of Eden when Eve asked the question, "Are we black or are we white?"[You have to get past the objection that, since they were naked^*, they should have been able to tell.]Adam asked what difference it would make and Eve said she just wanted to know. She suggested that Adam should ask God next time he saw Him. Adam was reluctant because he thought God might think it was a stupid question but finally he agreed.The next day, Adam ran into God and he cautiously brought up the question: "You know that woman you gave me...." "Yes.""She wanted me to ask you a question. I didn't want to bother you with it but she wouldn't take 'no' for an answer. You know how women are." "Yes, I do. What's the question?""Well, she wanted to know, are we black or are we white?" "That's a stupid question.""I know - but what should I tell her?"God paused thoughtfully. "Just tell her you are what you are.""Okay." Adam wasn't happy with that answer because he suspected Eve wouldn't be, but he wasn't about to push God any further. He went back to Eve, who was eagerly waiting."Well, did you ask Him?""Yes, I asked him - and He was none too pleased. He said it was a stupid qestion.""But did He answer it?""He just said to tell you that you are what you are.""I see," Eve nodded thoughtfully. "Then we're white."Adam frowned. "How do you figure that?""Because if we were black He would have said, 'You is what you is.'"

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^* A long time ago I read an article about how young children perceive gender diffrences. Apparently, they often think that by dressing like a girl you become a girl or by playing with a boy's toys you become a boy. One five-year-old girl had a new baby sibling at home and she was asked if it was a boy or a girl. She replied, "I'm not sure. It's so hard to tell at that age, especially with their clothes off."

Faith talking about PRACTICING siners reminded me of a couple of old jokes: and

Dyslexia kicks in again: I read that as GOD.

I remember hearing that joke after the 6-Day War in 1967 but it was an Egyptian tank. During World War Two it was an Italian tank. (That may actually be a "new" joke, since horses don't have reverse gears.)

Interesting that Plan A is sell the house. Plan B is get rid of the demons. Making a buck trumps doing unto others as you would have them do unto you.Myself, if I had a haunted house, I'd be thinking fire.

Q: What's the difference between natural selection and sexual selection?A: One depends on whether or not you get eaten before you can reproduce.

U₂₃₈: Do these electrons make me look fat?U₂₃₅: No, it's the neutrons that make you look fat.

It was probably the Asian driver's fault.

Gopher wood: the reason why there are so many gophers.

You'd have to ask a female gopher or a gay gopher.

"Take my wife... please."

A man goes to a costume party carrying a girl on his back. The host asks him, "Why aren't you wearing a costume?""I am," the guest replies. "I'm a tortoise.""What's that on your back then?" the host asks, pointing at the girl."That's Michelle."

That should be, "I have a daughter, eh."

quote:

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"The wider context is a detailed discussion of best practices for proper training and storage of the kittens to maintain maximum durability."

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Bonsai Kitten