Register | Sign In


Understanding through Discussion


EvC Forum active members: 45 (9208 total)
3 online now:
Newest Member: anil dahar
Post Volume: Total: 919,516 Year: 6,773/9,624 Month: 113/238 Week: 30/83 Day: 6/3 Hour: 0/1


EvC Forum ⇒ Side Orders ⇒ Coffee House ⇒

Now you too can smell like Jesus.

Thread ▼ Details

Email This Thread
Newer Topic | Older Topic
  
12Next
Author Topic:   Now you too can smell like Jesus.
jar
Member (Idle past 99 days)
Posts: 34140
From: Texas!!
Joined: 04-20-2004

jar Posts Only
Message 1 of 22 (193571)
03-23-2005 12:37 AM

The Fragrance of His Essence TM is a patent-pending formula combining myrrh, aloe and cassia. It is the perfect accompaniment to your glow in the dark statues of the Twelve Apostles (individually autographed) and your Jesus Dash-BoardTM Bobblehead.
​
Soon to be available as perfume, handcream and potpourri. Check your local retailer for availability.
​
Good Grief!
Replies to this message:
 Message 2 by arachnophilia, posted 03-23-2005 12:48 AM jar has not replied
 Message 6 by Phat, posted 11-17-2012 11:35 AM jar has seen this message but not replied
 Message 8 by ringo, posted 11-17-2012 1:50 PM jar has seen this message but not replied
 Message 16 by Jon, posted 11-17-2012 10:19 PM jar has seen this message but not replied
  
arachnophilia
Member (Idle past 1604 days)
Posts: 9069
From: god's waiting room
Joined: 05-21-2004

arachnophilia Posts Only
Message 2 of 22 (193573)
03-23-2005 12:48 AM 		Reply to: Message 1 by jar
03-23-2005 12:37 AM

it seems to me that i would NOT want to smell like jesus. the guy walked the earth as a poor homeless man. then he died a brutal agonizing death. and that was 2000 some years ago.
​
i mean, not to be sacreligous here, but the dude's gotta smell pret-ty rank.
This message is a reply to:
 Message 1 by jar, posted 03-23-2005 12:37 AM jar has not replied
Replies to this message:
 Message 3 by Phat, posted 03-23-2005 3:06 AM arachnophilia has replied
  
Phat
Member
Posts: 18655
From: Denver,Colorado USA
Joined: 12-30-2003
Member Rating: 4.4

Phat Posts Only

(3)
Message 3 of 22 (193592)
03-23-2005 3:06 AM 		Reply to: Message 2 by arachnophilia
03-23-2005 12:48 AM

Do all proceeds from the sale of His Essence go help the homeless 'least of these' who also smell quite rank?
​
Or is this another attempt to use the Holy name in order to make a fortune and fill up the storehouses on earth while ignoring the purpose of which the individual was created?
​
I dunno...I smell a rat!
​
Maybe we could market a soothing chest salve and call it Messiahlatem.
Or how about beef jerky that was kosher and made only from sacred cows? JesusJerky?tm
​
This message has been edited by Phatboy, 03-23-2005 01:12 AM
This message is a reply to:
 Message 2 by arachnophilia, posted 03-23-2005 12:48 AM arachnophilia has replied
Replies to this message:
 Message 4 by Dilyias, posted 03-23-2005 5:03 PM Phat has not replied
 Message 5 by arachnophilia, posted 03-23-2005 11:02 PM Phat has not replied
 Message 7 by fearandloathing, posted 11-17-2012 12:02 PM Phat has not replied
 Message 11 by Omnivorous, posted 11-17-2012 3:06 PM Phat has not replied
  
Dilyias
Member (Idle past 1627 days)
Posts: 21
From: Minnesota
Joined: 10-02-2003

Dilyias Posts Only
Message 4 of 22 (193728)
03-23-2005 5:03 PM 		Reply to: Message 3 by Phat
03-23-2005 3:06 AM

That's almost as bad as those Shroud of Turin beach towels!
This message is a reply to:
 Message 3 by Phat, posted 03-23-2005 3:06 AM Phat has not replied
Replies to this message:
 Message 10 by Omnivorous, posted 11-17-2012 3:04 PM Dilyias has not replied
  
arachnophilia
Member (Idle past 1604 days)
Posts: 9069
From: god's waiting room
Joined: 05-21-2004

arachnophilia Posts Only
Message 5 of 22 (193834)
03-23-2005 11:02 PM 		Reply to: Message 3 by Phat
03-23-2005 3:06 AM

Or how about beef jerky that was kosher and made only from sacred cows?
​
i dunno, the bible doesn't look too kindly on sacred cows.
​
but yes. turning over the tables, and all that. jesus would be appalled.
This message is a reply to:
 Message 3 by Phat, posted 03-23-2005 3:06 AM Phat has not replied
  
Phat
Member
Posts: 18655
From: Denver,Colorado USA
Joined: 12-30-2003
Member Rating: 4.4

Phat Posts Only

(2)
Message 6 of 22 (680045)
11-17-2012 11:35 AM 		Reply to: Message 1 by jar
03-23-2005 12:37 AM

Meanwhile at the park
People are talking a lot these days.....
​
This message is a reply to:
 Message 1 by jar, posted 03-23-2005 12:37 AM jar has seen this message but not replied
  
fearandloathing
Member (Idle past 4405 days)
Posts: 990
From: Burlington, NC, USA
Joined: 02-24-2011

fearandloathing Posts Only
Message 7 of 22 (680049)
11-17-2012 12:02 PM 		Reply to: Message 3 by Phat
03-23-2005 3:06 AM

I dunno...I smell a rat!
​
No problem, all you need is...
​
Anti-intellectualism has been a constant thread winding its way through our political and cultural life, nurtured by the false notion that democracy means that 'my ignorance is just as good as your knowledge.'
― Isaac Asimov
​
"You don't have to burn books to destroy a culture. Just get people to stop reading them" - Ray Bradbury
This message is a reply to:
 Message 3 by Phat, posted 03-23-2005 3:06 AM Phat has not replied
  
ringo
Member (Idle past 672 days)
Posts: 20940
From: frozen wasteland
Joined: 03-23-2005

ringo Posts Only
Message 8 of 22 (680072)
11-17-2012 1:50 PM 		Reply to: Message 1 by jar
03-23-2005 12:37 AM

jar writes:
​
The Fragrance of His Essence TM is a patent-pending formula combining myrrh, aloe and cassia.
What? No frankincense?
This message is a reply to:
 Message 1 by jar, posted 03-23-2005 12:37 AM jar has seen this message but not replied
  
Granny Magda
Member (Idle past 298 days)
Posts: 2462
From: UK
Joined: 11-12-2007

Granny Magda Posts Only
Message 9 of 22 (680081)
11-17-2012 2:45 PM

SMASH!
WHY SMELL LIKE PUNY JESUS WHEN YOU CAN SMELL LIKE HULK?
​
​
JESUS SMELL FUNNY! HULK IS STRONGEST SMELL THERE IS!
​
Please note that this product contains higher than recommended levels of gamma radiation. Marvel Comics takes no responsibility for any monsterism experienced whilst wearing this fragrance.
​
Mutate and SMASH!
Replies to this message:
 Message 14 by Omnivorous, posted 11-17-2012 3:46 PM Granny Magda has seen this message but not replied
  
Omnivorous
Member (Idle past 135 days)
Posts: 4001
From: Adirondackia
Joined: 07-21-2005

Omnivorous Posts Only
Message 10 of 22 (680085)
11-17-2012 3:04 PM 		Reply to: Message 4 by Dilyias
03-23-2005 5:03 PM

Dilyias writes:
​
That's almost as bad as those Shroud of Turin beach towels!
​
I want one!
"If you can keep your head while those around you are losing theirs, you can collect a lot of heads."
This message is a reply to:
 Message 4 by Dilyias, posted 03-23-2005 5:03 PM Dilyias has not replied
  
Omnivorous
Member (Idle past 135 days)
Posts: 4001
From: Adirondackia
Joined: 07-21-2005

Omnivorous Posts Only
Message 11 of 22 (680086)
11-17-2012 3:06 PM 		Reply to: Message 3 by Phat
03-23-2005 3:06 AM

And GandhiAde would be...uh, never mind.
"If you can keep your head while those around you are losing theirs, you can collect a lot of heads."
This message is a reply to:
 Message 3 by Phat, posted 03-23-2005 3:06 AM Phat has not replied
  
Dogmafood
Member
Posts: 1815
From: Ontario Canada
Joined: 08-04-2010

Dogmafood Posts Only

(7)
Message 12 of 22 (680092)
11-17-2012 3:33 PM

Divine by association
I always wanted to open a deli and call it 'Cheeses of Nazareth.'
Replies to this message:
 Message 13 by fearandloathing, posted 11-17-2012 3:37 PM Dogmafood has seen this message but not replied
 Message 15 by jar, posted 11-17-2012 3:51 PM Dogmafood has seen this message but not replied
 Message 18 by Tangle, posted 11-19-2012 5:24 AM Dogmafood has replied
 Message 21 by kjsimons, posted 11-19-2012 5:12 PM Dogmafood has seen this message but not replied
  
fearandloathing
Member (Idle past 4405 days)
Posts: 990
From: Burlington, NC, USA
Joined: 02-24-2011

fearandloathing Posts Only

(2)
Message 13 of 22 (680093)
11-17-2012 3:37 PM 		Reply to: Message 12 by Dogmafood
11-17-2012 3:33 PM

Re: Divine by association
You could open up a dog kennel next door....'Noah's Bark'
Anti-intellectualism has been a constant thread winding its way through our political and cultural life, nurtured by the false notion that democracy means that 'my ignorance is just as good as your knowledge.'
― Isaac Asimov
​
"You don't have to burn books to destroy a culture. Just get people to stop reading them" - Ray Bradbury
This message is a reply to:
 Message 12 by Dogmafood, posted 11-17-2012 3:33 PM Dogmafood has seen this message but not replied
  
Omnivorous
Member (Idle past 135 days)
Posts: 4001
From: Adirondackia
Joined: 07-21-2005

Omnivorous Posts Only

(2)
Message 14 of 22 (680094)
11-17-2012 3:46 PM 		Reply to: Message 9 by Granny Magda
11-17-2012 2:45 PM

Re: SMASH!
Puny god.
"If you can keep your head while those around you are losing theirs, you can collect a lot of heads."
This message is a reply to:
 Message 9 by Granny Magda, posted 11-17-2012 2:45 PM Granny Magda has seen this message but not replied
  
jar
Member (Idle past 99 days)
Posts: 34140
From: Texas!!
Joined: 04-20-2004

jar Posts Only

(4)
Message 15 of 22 (680096)
11-17-2012 3:51 PM 		Reply to: Message 12 by Dogmafood
11-17-2012 3:33 PM

Re: Divine by association
And a coffee shop called Holy Grounds.
Anyone so limited that they can only spell a word one way is severely handicapped!
This message is a reply to:
 Message 12 by Dogmafood, posted 11-17-2012 3:33 PM Dogmafood has seen this message but not replied
  
Date format: mm-dd-yyyy
Timezone: ET (US)
  
12Next
Newer Topic | Older Topic
Jump to:


Copyright 2001-2023 by EvC Forum, All Rights Reserved

™ Version 4.2
Innovative software from Qwixotic © 2024