Author
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Topic: Humor IV
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Minnemooseus
Member Posts: 3945 From: Duluth, Minnesota, U.S. (West end of Lake Superior) Joined: 11-11-2001 Member Rating: 10.0
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Message 61 of 540 (475572)
07-16-2008 7:25 PM
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A side note to the "P.Z. Myers in the news..." topic
P.Z. Myers in the news (the catholic church communion wafer incident) quote: Ole was the only Lutheran in his little town of all Catholics. That was okay, but the neighbors had a problem with his barbecuing venison every Friday. Since they couldn't eat meat on Friday, the tempting aroma was getting the best of them. So the neighbors got together and went over and persuaded Ole to join their church. The big day came and the priest had Ole kneel. He put his hand on Ole's head and said, "Ole, you were born a Lutheran, you were raised a Lutheran, and now," he said as he sprinkled some incense over Ole's head, "now you are a Catholic!" Ole was happy and the neighbors were happy. But the following Friday evening at suppertime, there was again that aroma coming from Ole's yard. The neighbors went to talk to him and as they approached the fence, they heard Ole saying: "You were born a whitetail deer, you were raised a whitetail, and now," he said with a sprinkle of seasoning, "now you are a walleye!"
Source = Past Shows | A Prairie Home Companion Moose
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Hyroglyphx
Inactive Member
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Message 62 of 540 (475893)
07-19-2008 3:14 PM
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Time for some campaignin'
It is time for some light-hearted, non-partisan humor to get you in the spirit of voting. Enjoy... http://sendables.jibjab.com/ “I know where I am and who I am. I'm on the brink of disillusionment, on the eve of bitter sweet. I'm perpetually one step away from either collapse or rebirth. I am exactly where I need to be. Either way I go towards rebirth, for a total collapse often brings a rebirth." -Andrew Jaramillo
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ramoss
Member (Idle past 633 days) Posts: 3228 Joined: 08-11-2004
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Message 63 of 540 (477477)
08-03-2008 12:58 PM
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Jewish Humor
A Jewish commedian on Bush, the Bible, fossils, and evolution. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w0gAcbAGPH4
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bluescat48
Member (Idle past 4211 days) Posts: 2347 From: United States Joined: 10-06-2007
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Message 64 of 540 (477495)
08-03-2008 6:56 PM
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Reply to: Message 63 by ramoss 08-03-2008 12:58 PM
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Re: Jewish Humor
Excellent video. He hits the nail right on the head.
There is no better love between 2 people than mutual respect for each other WT Young, 2002 Who gave anyone the authority to call me an authority on anything. WT Young, 1969
This message is a reply to: | | Message 63 by ramoss, posted 08-03-2008 12:58 PM | | ramoss has not replied |
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Stile
Member Posts: 4295 From: Ontario, Canada Joined: 12-02-2004
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Message 65 of 540 (477874)
08-08-2008 3:08 PM
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What is oozing out of our ground?
What is the world coming to that ground water has become so horribly contaminated over the last 20 years?
Replies to this message: | | Message 66 by New Cat's Eye, posted 08-08-2008 3:39 PM | | Stile has seen this message but not replied | | Message 67 by AZPaul3, posted 08-08-2008 4:54 PM | | Stile has seen this message but not replied | | Message 68 by anglagard, posted 08-08-2008 6:55 PM | | Stile has seen this message but not replied | | Message 69 by bluegenes, posted 08-08-2008 7:07 PM | | Stile has seen this message but not replied | | Message 70 by RAZD, posted 08-09-2008 6:51 PM | | Stile has seen this message but not replied |
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New Cat's Eye
Inactive Member
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Message 66 of 540 (477875)
08-08-2008 3:39 PM
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Reply to: Message 65 by Stile 08-08-2008 3:08 PM
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Re: What is oozing out of our ground?
What is the world coming to that ground water has become so horribly contaminated over the last 20 years? Didn't you hear her.... its metallic oxide salts.
This message is a reply to: | | Message 65 by Stile, posted 08-08-2008 3:08 PM | | Stile has seen this message but not replied |
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AZPaul3
Member Posts: 8529 From: Phoenix Joined: 11-06-2006 Member Rating: 5.1
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Message 67 of 540 (477880)
08-08-2008 4:54 PM
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Reply to: Message 65 by Stile 08-08-2008 3:08 PM
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Re: What is oozing out of our ground?
She is wrong. Over 6,000 years ago god put the metal oxide salts in our water to test our faith. We failed. Edited by AZPaul3, : cuz.
This message is a reply to: | | Message 65 by Stile, posted 08-08-2008 3:08 PM | | Stile has seen this message but not replied |
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anglagard
Member (Idle past 858 days) Posts: 2339 From: Socorro, New Mexico USA Joined: 03-18-2006
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Message 68 of 540 (477887)
08-08-2008 6:55 PM
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Reply to: Message 65 by Stile 08-08-2008 3:08 PM
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Re: What is oozing out of our ground?
Perhaps she should use Brawndo: The Thirst Mutilator to water her lawn. It has electrolytes!
Read not to contradict and confute, not to believe and take for granted, not to find talk and discourse, but to weigh and consider - Francis Bacon The more we understand particular things, the more we understand God - Spinoza
This message is a reply to: | | Message 65 by Stile, posted 08-08-2008 3:08 PM | | Stile has seen this message but not replied |
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bluegenes
Member (Idle past 2498 days) Posts: 3119 From: U.K. Joined: 01-24-2007
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Message 69 of 540 (477889)
08-08-2008 7:07 PM
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Reply to: Message 65 by Stile 08-08-2008 3:08 PM
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Re: What is oozing out of our ground?
Has Ray had a sex change?
This message is a reply to: | | Message 65 by Stile, posted 08-08-2008 3:08 PM | | Stile has seen this message but not replied |
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RAZD
Member (Idle past 1426 days) Posts: 20714 From: the other end of the sidewalk Joined: 03-14-2004
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Message 70 of 540 (477936)
08-09-2008 6:51 PM
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Reply to: Message 65 by Stile 08-08-2008 3:08 PM
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Re: What is oozing out of our ground?
OMG she's right! I looked a pictures from my childhood when we played in sprinklers and there was no color in the spray!!! Enjoy
This message is a reply to: | | Message 65 by Stile, posted 08-08-2008 3:08 PM | | Stile has seen this message but not replied |
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AnswersInGenitals
Member (Idle past 172 days) Posts: 673 Joined: 07-20-2006
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Message 71 of 540 (477949)
08-10-2008 12:43 AM
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Reply to: Message 70 by RAZD 08-09-2008 6:51 PM
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Re: What is oozing out of our ground?
OMG she's right! I looked a pictures from my childhood when we played in sprinklers and there was no color in the spray!!!
But then, color photography hadn't yet been invented when you were a child. (I couldn't check my childhood pictures because photography hadn't been invented yet.) Edited by AnswersInGenitals, : No reason given.
This message is a reply to: | | Message 70 by RAZD, posted 08-09-2008 6:51 PM | | RAZD has seen this message but not replied |
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Minnemooseus
Member Posts: 3945 From: Duluth, Minnesota, U.S. (West end of Lake Superior) Joined: 11-11-2001 Member Rating: 10.0
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Message 72 of 540 (478531)
08-16-2008 8:44 PM
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GWB at Olympics
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RAZD
Member (Idle past 1426 days) Posts: 20714 From: the other end of the sidewalk Joined: 03-14-2004
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Message 73 of 540 (478711)
08-19-2008 10:14 PM
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Abbott and Costello ?
From an email:
quote: If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their infamous sketch, 'Who's on First?' might have turned out something like this: COSTELLO CALLS TO BUY A COMPUTER FROM ABBOTT ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you? COSTELLO : Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den and I'm thinking about buying a computer. ABBOTT : Mac? COSTELLO : No, the name's Lou . ABBOTT : Your computer? COSTELLO : I don't own a computer. I want to buy one. ABBOTT : Mac? COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou . ABBOTT : What about Windows? COSTELLO : Why? Will it get stuffy in here? ABBOTT : Do you want a computer with Windows? COSTELLO : I don't know. What will I see when I look at the windows? ABBOTT : Wallpaper. COSTELLO : Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software. ABBOTT : Software for Windows? COSTELLO : No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What do you have? ABBOTT : Office. COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything? ABBOTT : I just did. COSTELLO : You just did what? ABBOTT : Recommend something. COSTELLO : You recommended something ? ABBOTT : Yes. COSTELLO : For my office? ABBOTT : Yes. COSTELLO : OK, what did you recommend for my office? ABBOTT : Office. COSTELLO : Yes, for my office! ABBOTT : I recommend Office with Windows. COSTELLO : I already have an office with windows! OK, let's just say I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need? ABBOTT : Word. COSTELLO : What word? ABBOTT : Word in Office. COSTELLO : The only word in office is office. ABBOTT : The Word in Office for Windows. COSTELLO : Which word in office for windows? ABBOTT : The Word you get when you click the blue 'W'. COSTELLO : I'm going to click your blue 'w' if you don't start with some straight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track my money with? ABBOTT: Money. COSTELLO : That's right. What do you have? ABBOTT : Money. COSTELLO : I need money to track my money? ABBOTT : It comes bundled with yo ur computer. COSTELLO : What's bundled with my computer? ABBOTT : Money. COSTELLO : Money comes with my computer? ABBOTT : Yes. No extra charge. COSTELLO : I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much? ABBOTT : One copy. COSTELLO : Isn't it illegal to copy money? ABBOTT : Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money. COSTELLO : They can give you a license to copy money? ABBOTT : Why not? THEY OWN IT! (A few days later) ABBOTT : Super Duper computer store. Can I help you? COSTELLO : How do I turn my computer off? ABBOTT : Click on 'START'.............
I don't want to start anything ... Enjoy. Edited by RAZD, : . we are limited in our ability to understand by our ability to understand
Rebel American Zen Deist
... to learn ... to think ... to live ... to laugh ... to share.
• • • Join the effort to solve medical problems, AIDS/HIV, Cancer and more with Team EvC! (click) • • •
Replies to this message: | | Message 75 by bluescat48, posted 08-23-2008 10:07 PM | | RAZD has seen this message but not replied |
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ramoss
Member (Idle past 633 days) Posts: 3228 Joined: 08-11-2004
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Message 74 of 540 (479049)
08-23-2008 9:59 PM
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Medival Tech SUpport
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bluescat48
Member (Idle past 4211 days) Posts: 2347 From: United States Joined: 10-06-2007
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Message 75 of 540 (479050)
08-23-2008 10:07 PM
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Reply to: Message 73 by RAZD 08-19-2008 10:14 PM
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Re: Abbott and Costello ?
Beautiful. If you don't hear from me in the next 24 hours, it means I probably died laughing!!!!
There is no better love between 2 people than mutual respect for each other WT Young, 2002 Who gave anyone the authority to call me an authority on anything. WT Young, 1969
This message is a reply to: | | Message 73 by RAZD, posted 08-19-2008 10:14 PM | | RAZD has seen this message but not replied |
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