Register | Sign In


Understanding through Discussion


EvC Forum active members: 63 (9161 total)
4 online now:
Newest Member: popoi
Post Volume: Total: 915,581 Year: 2,838/9,624 Month: 683/1,588 Week: 89/229 Day: 61/28 Hour: 3/4


Thread  Details

Email This Thread
Newer Topic | Older Topic
  
Author Topic:   Please - Some Impartial Advice Needed
RAZD
Member (Idle past 1395 days)
Posts: 20714
From: the other end of the sidewalk
Joined: 03-14-2004


Message 4 of 240 (404392)
06-08-2007 4:01 PM
Reply to: Message 1 by taylor_31
06-08-2007 3:00 PM


I wish you luck and happiness. It is a hard road because so many people have expectations of who you are and what you are, but this image of you is not your problem it is theirs.
Certainly be open and honest with yourself is the most important thing anyone can do
Parents are likely to take it the worst because they feel they are responsible for the result of how you were raised and anything they see as a "failure" in you is also taken (sometimes subconsciously) as being a failure on their part.
You've made this decision to tell your mom, and cannot take it back. What you can do is look for a local support org and see if you can get advice to bridge the current gap. Maybe see if there are seminars for partents on what it means to have gay children.
Courage

Join the effort to unravel AIDS/HIV, unfold Proteomes, fight Cancer,
compare Fiocruz Genome and fight Muscular Dystrophy with Team EvC! (click)


we are limited in our ability to understand
by our ability to understand
RebelAAmericanOZen[Deist
... to learn ... to think ... to live ... to laugh ...
to share.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 1 by taylor_31, posted 06-08-2007 3:00 PM taylor_31 has not replied

  
RAZD
Member (Idle past 1395 days)
Posts: 20714
From: the other end of the sidewalk
Joined: 03-14-2004


Message 10 of 240 (404708)
06-09-2007 7:33 AM
Reply to: Message 9 by Doddy
06-09-2007 1:29 AM


and to Taylor tooo
I'm nineteen, and ...
I'm impressed
I was late in the game too, however I once was in a situation where I could have had a homosexual experience, but my little man was totally unimpressed.
... because I'm only eighteen that my developing brain is in no position to make decisions about my life.
And because she isn't even in your brain, she has even less of a position to make decisions about your life.
There is a part of the brain that is not fully developed until ~20-22, but it is about making 'moral' type decisions IIRC, and not about sexual arrousal or interest. Of course this gets into the issue of whether it is a choice or not (and as noted above, choice does not match the evidence).
taylor_31 writes:
Overall, she told me that I was throwing away everything I have worked for, everything in my life, for a dumb lie.
That's a massive exaggeration. What, exactly, do you lose by being gay?
Only sexual turmoils of heterosexual activities. You still read the same books, have the same opinions, play the same games, and instruments and have the same other interests.
There are many famous gay people, so if gay = loose everything then what have they lost?
In my opinion, knowledge of homosexuality would be so much better if everyone had an opportunity to see homosexual fruit flies.
And Bonobos
Loading...
etc
http://www.bidstrup.com/sodomy.htm
Salon.com
It's not just human behavior.
... saying that she'll never condone or accept it.
Of course she won't. Just feel lucky that you're not in Iran or somewhere else where homosexuals are killed.
Condoning and accepting are two different things. I think she will change her opinion the more she lives with the facts. And be happy you last name isn't Phelps.
Enjoy.
Edited by RAZD, : .

Join the effort to unravel AIDS/HIV, unfold Proteomes, fight Cancer,
compare Fiocruz Genome and fight Muscular Dystrophy with Team EvC! (click)


we are limited in our ability to understand
by our ability to understand
RebelAAmericanOZen[Deist
... to learn ... to think ... to live ... to laugh ...
to share.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 9 by Doddy, posted 06-09-2007 1:29 AM Doddy has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 12 by Doddy, posted 06-09-2007 9:44 AM RAZD has replied

  
RAZD
Member (Idle past 1395 days)
Posts: 20714
From: the other end of the sidewalk
Joined: 03-14-2004


Message 13 of 240 (404724)
06-09-2007 11:13 AM
Reply to: Message 12 by Doddy
06-09-2007 9:44 AM


Re: and to Taylor tooo
AND either it is not choice or flies can choose ... a level of inteliigent behavior not many are willing to assign.
Good point

Join the effort to unravel AIDS/HIV, unfold Proteomes, fight Cancer,
compare Fiocruz Genome and fight Muscular Dystrophy with Team EvC! (click)


we are limited in our ability to understand
by our ability to understand
RebelAAmericanOZen[Deist
... to learn ... to think ... to live ... to laugh ...
to share.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 12 by Doddy, posted 06-09-2007 9:44 AM Doddy has not replied

  
RAZD
Member (Idle past 1395 days)
Posts: 20714
From: the other end of the sidewalk
Joined: 03-14-2004


Message 30 of 240 (404939)
06-10-2007 6:01 PM
Reply to: Message 19 by taylor_31
06-10-2007 2:09 AM


She has talked to my dad, and she says that they are going to make me quit my job, get me away from my gay friend, and make me work for my dad in the oil field. Gawd almighty.
This could be a very dangerous position for you. You need to consider your personal safety.
Tell your mom and dad that you'll only agree to this with the understanding that they realize that this may mean that you may be injured or worse (intentionally) by a co-worker. This has to be up front, because it won't stay hidden to everyone, and you think the best protection is to tell everyone that you are gay.
I wish you luck with them. Personally I think they need counseling, and NOT by a minister, by a social worker.
Enjoy.

Join the effort to unravel AIDS/HIV, unfold Proteomes, fight Cancer,
compare Fiocruz Genome and fight Muscular Dystrophy with Team EvC! (click)


we are limited in our ability to understand
by our ability to understand
RebelAAmericanOZen[Deist
... to learn ... to think ... to live ... to laugh ...
to share.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 19 by taylor_31, posted 06-10-2007 2:09 AM taylor_31 has not replied

  
Newer Topic | Older Topic
Jump to:


Copyright 2001-2023 by EvC Forum, All Rights Reserved

™ Version 4.2
Innovative software from Qwixotic © 2024