The Return of Humor

Because there's always time for funny. Who else has a laugh?

A priest, a minister, and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Is this some kind of joke?"Lam, Rocket... you're dead inside. There, I said it.

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"Egos drone and pose alone, Like black balloons, all banged and blown
On a backwards river the infidels shiver in the stench of belief.
And tell my mama I'm a hundred years late; I'm over the rails and out of the race
The crippled psalms of an age that won't thaw are ringing in my ears"
-Beck

Well... duh.

Oh man... my Mom is Jewish, and my Dad is half Irish Catholic, half English Protestant. I hate myself on so many levels...

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"Archeologists near mount Sinai have discovered what is believed to be a missing page from the Bible. The page is currently being carbon dated in Bonn. If genuine, it belongs at the beginning of the Bible and is believed to read, 'To my darling Candy. All characters portrayed within this book are fictitous, and any resemblance to persons living or dead is purely coincidental.' The page has been universally condemned by church leaders."
-Rob Grant and Doug Naylor

HA HA HA HA HA!Random discordians are some of my favorite people in the world, they really are.

I don't know if this one's been done yet, and don't feel like going through eleven pages. So I'll risk repeating a joke.A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The egg looks frustrated, while the chicken looks nice and relaxed. The chicken lights a cigarette, turns to the egg, and says, "I guess that settles that."

Am I the only one who thinks Holmes' avatar says, "Don't let me interrupt, ladies. Just here to fix the cable..." to the tune of Grand Funk Railroad?

I love this site:Dihydrogen Monoxide Research Division - dihydrogen monoxide info

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"Egos drone and pose alone, Like black balloons, all banged and blown
On a backwards river, infidels shiver In the stench of belief
And tell my mama I'm a hundred years late
I'm over the rails and out of the race
The crippled psalms of an age that won't thaw ringing in my ears"
-Beck

Thank you. I would have spent my day going, "wait... hang on. There were... no wait, damn it, it's moving again. And there's... no, damn it, that can't be right..."

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"Creationists make it sound as though a theory is something you dreamt up after being drunk all night."
-Isaac Asimov

Consider it yours. But nobody touches the hand puppets. They're my special babies.This message has been edited by Dan Carroll, 03-09-2005 12:55 AM

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"Creationists make it sound as though a theory is something you dreamt up after being drunk all night."
-Isaac Asimov

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"You can't expect him to be answering your prayers when he's not real, can you? That's like writing to the characters of a soap opera and expecting a reply, Mr. Silly Sausage!"
-Jane Christie

I might be able to get you a copy. If I'm not mistaken (although I might be) my girlfriend has an Mp3 of the Muppets doing it.

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"You can't expect him to be answering your prayers when he's not real, can you? That's like writing to the characters of a soap opera and expecting a reply, Mr. Silly Sausage!"
-Jane Christie

No prob. In the meantime, this might work.

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"You can't expect him to be answering your prayers when he's not real, can you? That's like writing to the characters of a soap opera and expecting a reply, Mr. Silly Sausage!"
-Jane Christie