Don't expect yourself to get over this quickly. You might be unpleasantly surprised at how long it really affects your everyday life. Take your time and try to help your friends to do the same. Saying that I'll pray for you all sounds trite and useless, but it's the only thing I can do to try and help.
I lost my father very suddenly in a car crash when I was six. I'm 41 now (shhhhh, don't tell everyone) and I can honestly say that there are still raw moments, even though I was too young to understand completely. If you want to pm me, feel free.
Listen to Trixie regarding how long it may take to get over your loss.
It took me about a year to get back to normal after my grandfather finally died. He had a slow-growing tumor between his skull and his brain that gradually impaired and then killed him. He was completely unaware of his surroundings for the last 2 years of his life.
Even though it was a relief when he died, it was still a big loss that took a long time to get over.
So so sorry Brennakimi, I lost a friend as well to a fatal car crash. She was 26. I never got over it.. and probably never will. It forever changed how I view things. But on a positive note I still cherish her memory and savor everyday I live.
yeah. i know it will never leave. i'm a pro at this. i'm mostly just so sad for the rest of my friends. (this being my mask so i'm not responsible for my own tears lol) i'm gonna discuss with my friends about founding a scholarship or something in his name.
I feel a little out of place commenting on this since nobody here really knows me that well, but I guess it doesn't hurt to add one more to the list of condolences, even if it does come from a stranger.
Like the others here, I too know what it's like to lose those you love and I'm sorry to hear about your friend. I'm sure that's not much consolation right now and I'm sorry that I can't offer you more comfort but perhaps you can find some in the knowledge that it will get easier with time. It never completely goes away (at least it hasn't in my case) but these things have a way of gradually easing over time.
So hang in there, brennakimi. And for what it's worth, all my best wishes.
Brennakimi, that is a sad story! I pray for Zacharys immediate family. I pray for his friends, such as you, who are all trying to process this loss.
I don't know Zachary, and I don't even know you, Bren...but I believe that God does know Zachary. I believe that God knew Zachary and all of his family better than they even knew each other.
I will say a prayer directed more personally, and I am sure that you also are in quiet contemplation. May the pain of Zacharys premature death at such a young age be a cause for others to live life with renewed committment, awareness, and zeal. A foundation or a collection for a donation to a cause that Zachary would have loved or supported would be a good idea. May God strengthen you and others as you rally the friends together for a reflection and celebration of Zacharys life. May God Himself show all of us that this tragedy will not prevent triumph of the human spirit! PB
By the way, Brennakimi...are these articles ones that your friend Zachary wrote? Was he a writer? #1 #2
This message has been edited by Phatboy, 04-20-2005 12:06 AM
I've been thinking about you and your friend for a few days now. I send my best wishes.
I also took time to think about a friend of mine from college, who died from cancer. His name was Kenton Lerch, and it's been a while since I thought of him. I feel sad to miss him, but happy to remember him.
I think your idea to establish something constructive, like a scholarship, in his name is a good one. Although it does not change the sadness, making your friend's passing into a bridge for others is something beautiful to me.