Off topic, a bit, I know, but I wanted to chime in with a bit of correction here.
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And hundreds of millions of bees never mate. They are incapable of it, actually. I think the pure raw mate-and-make-babies argument can only apply to non-social animals and really, there aren't very many of them. Once a social structure gets in the game, the rules change. Things that may not be beneficial for loners may suddenly become helpful.
Most eusocial critters, at least Hymenoptera (bees, wasps, ants and their ilk), are highly caste stratified into reproductives (a queen, and some male drones) and a huge majority of non-reproductives. A good case has been made (starting with Wilson, for instance), that the entire social structure of eusocial insects is "built" around insuring the survival and reproduction of the colony. In fact, in a lot of the species' males have a realllllyyyy short lifespan geared specifically and ONLY toward mating. So saying that "once a social structure gets in the game the rules change" seems to me to be inaccurate. I'm not disagreeing with your overall premise (see below), just that using eusociality is a bad example.
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I personally think that sexuality in humans serves to maintain social bonds, which we depend upon a great deal.
Couldn't agree more - that's actually the evolutionary explanation for why sex is so enjoyable
. We can observe the use of sex - both literal and figurative, and both homo- and heterosexuality - in our nearest cousins where it very much serves to maintain, strengthen, or occasionally determine, social bonds.
Back to your regularly scheduled discussion.