greentwiga writes:
The main points that I make are that a marsh flood can last over a year, the reed boat can be huge, It could hold the Sumerian animals, that all the holy mountains of the region could have been covered, and the ark could have landed on a ziggurat or some other sacred mountain of the marsh region.
Okay, yes. Maybe things
could have happened that way. As long as we're discussing everything possible that
could have happened, may I introduce you to my Robot Monkey Flood Hypothesis, as first postulated in
Message 61 in the
Creationist experiment to prove the possibility of Noah's ark thread?
quote:
1. Noah did not actually have to do most of the labor building the Ark. Robot monkeys are easily programmed to do basic construction work.
2. Likewise gathering all the animals two by two. Robot monkeys equipped with jet packs cound have traveled quickly around the globe to collect all necessary "kinds."
3. Robot monkeys doen't need to sleep, so they can take care of all the animals around the clock.
4. Robot monkeys can also use their jet packs to fly out to all the floating vegetation mats to tend to insects too.
5. If the Ark were also equipped with a Matter-Antimatter Transmutation Fabricator (which the Robot Monkeys would also be able to build), then it would be easy to recycle waste matter back into fresh, nutritious food.
6. Radiation leakage from a broken Robot Monkey Atomic Power Pack could also have affected atomic decay rates around the globe, rendering all radiometric dating techniques invalid. This indicates to me that at least one Robot Monkey did not survive the whole voyage.
7. Robot Monkeys could also have a combined data storage capacity big enough to contain all the information they'd need to retrain young animals that were raised on the Ark to return to life in the wild.
Nowhere in the Bible does it say that there
weren't any robot monkeys, so I consider the fact that there
could have been robot monkeys to be just as convincing at three-story high gopher wood boats that were really made out of reeds carrying every animal that breathes on board, which really only means those living in the immediate area of the Tigris and Euphrates rivers, in order to survive a worldwide flood that really only affected certain selected parts of the Near East, ending up on the top of a mountain that was really a Babylonian pyramid, while leaving no physical evidence that any of this actually happened.
I find the robot monkeys much more likely.
I have no time for lies and fantasy, and neither should you. Enjoy or die.
-John Lydon
What's the difference between a conspiracy theorist and a new puppy? The puppy eventually grows up and quits whining.
-Steven Dutch
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