Summations Only

Pension? How quaint--that's so 20th century.Once you get rid of that nanny umbilical, you'll be truly free. Soon, without any pensions, public healthcare or other government intrusions into the natural market, we'll all be rich as kings.I saw it on television.

Dear Oni,Because what you do for the fattest of these, you do for me.Your friend,Jesus

Naw, I'm gonna cling to life as hard as that dirty underwear is clinging to your ass.Despite decades of bad eating, heavy drinking, sexual license, every drug known to man (with new ones appearing every day), Bones says I still have fantastic recuperative powers.And you, young fella, are going to pay for it.There's a lot of us freaky geezers (freezers, to those in the know), and we vote. A lot. Even the GOP says I'm old enough so that I'll keep my Medicare even if they take yours, so tough titty.Either they're honorable men who will keep their word, or they've sold their souls for votes: in either case, I'm good.Close schools, shut down vaccination programs, neglect the infrastructure--what do I care? I know all I need to know, my vaccines are covered, and who cares if the roads go to shit? I've been everywhere already.While you have yet to prove you have much staying power at all. Anybody can live a few decades with the help of youthful vigor--it's the decades that require guile and deceit that really test a phenotype.So do all the sit-ups you like, kid, as long as you still bend over and pay those taxes.I'm gonna cling to life until I need transplants, and then I'm gonna hack the donor database until I find some young Republican with the right profile (maybe a Mormon) who never had a drink and never enjoyed a smoke, and push him in front of a bus moving not too fast and not too slow. That's my idea of moderation.And when some young hotshot in the lab figures out how to repair my telomeres and reverse my aging process, I'm gonna vote to make sure that the...mature citizens most at risk get that first. That's only fair.Maybe, if you've got the grit and the fire, you'll make it, too.Whatevs.

In this regard, like you on health, I prefer to recommend making wiser choices in life. Why should I pay to make your boy-like girl look more like a girl?Don't want no plastic titties: they don't feel right.Call me old-fashioned. If you want better boob options, do more sit-ups.

That's nice.Let me know when you hit 60.I'll be in Costa Rica, getting new teeth to go with my cheap wine, good bread and young girls.Edited by Omnivorous, : No reason given.

He quit smoking: he's now in the zealot phase.This, too, shall pass.

Let me make myself perfectly clear: I''m not proposing free healthcare for anyone but me and my generational cohorts.If you're too hurt, sick or worn down to contribute productively to the tax base that sustains my senescence, you should be culled.Keep working out, kid, that's fine--but mostly, just keep working.

A better species? A better species?The species produced moi--what could be better than moi?Having produced me, the species only need be good enough to sustain me.And what we have, to paraphrase Falstaff, will fill my money pit as well as better.

Oh the irony.Every post has been on topic, if obliquely and, sometimes (in the case of others) sardonically or satirically.Still, fine, I'll go clip my coupons.

Yes, but I expect my senior tax exemptions to cancel those out.There are really only two things I have left to say in this thread.First, Dr Adequate's proposition in toto is, indeed, irrefutable.The component propositions already suggest the arguments that make it so. Perhaps that is why no real opposition has been articulated from an opposing camp, and why Oni's venture sparked so many similarly natured replies, along with some ill-natured carping.Second, satire, parody, mockery and their brethren are legitimate; Dr A frequently employs them.I can understand his frustration that the thread brims with such contributions from others, but an objection from the most savage wit on the board seems a bit...well, not hypocritical, exactly, but certainly ironic.I am content with my contribution and, partly out of respect for the well constructed OP and Dr A's request, as well as considerable respect for Dr. A himself, content to wait for more substantive contributions from those opposed to public health care.I don't think we'll see them.

Protocols at transplant centers in the U.S. will make smokers and drinkers very low priority, if not rule them out entirely.If there were an excess of donor organs, that might not be so.

Where are these documents kept?Tryptamines are the only one-dose/long-acting cure for depression.All other options are Band-Aids on gashes.Jeez. Kids today...