Understanding through Discussion


Welcome! You are not logged in. [ Login ]
EvC Forum active members: 88 (8945 total)
33 online now:
1.61803, DrJones*, dwise1, jar, Taq (5 members, 28 visitors)
Newest Member: ski zawaski
Post Volume: Total: 865,780 Year: 20,816/19,786 Month: 1,213/2,023 Week: 164/557 Day: 51/43 Hour: 2/4


Thread  Details

Email This Thread
Newer Topic | Older Topic
  
Author Topic:   Dating services and foreign women
Rahvin
Member
Posts: 3964
Joined: 07-01-2005


(1)
Message 15 of 174 (685830)
12-27-2012 2:42 PM
Reply to: Message 14 by nwr
12-27-2012 2:35 PM


Re: catch them in the act of their deception
That's probably not worth the effort.

The chances are that:

they are using fake names;
they are connecting to the net through hacked computers, to hide their origin.

Even with evidence of deception, you could probably never tie that evidence to a specific person.

The dating site itself is possibly being run from a botnet of hacked computers.

That's a bit extreme. While some of the "mail order bride" sites are likely to be as you say, most of the fake profiles I've seen from years of online dating sites are simply created by webcam models. Most of them are painfully obvious, and so easy to avoid. And, of course, none of it is illegal, and so there's no effort taken to obfuscate their origins beyond what your more standard stripper would do.


“The human understanding when it has once adopted an opinion (either as being the received opinion or as being agreeable to itself) draws all things else to support and agree with it.”
- Francis Bacon

"There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old's life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs." - John Rogers

“A world that can be explained even with bad reasons is a familiar world. But, on the other hand, in a universe suddenly divested of illusions and lights, man feels an alien, a stranger. His exile is without remedy since he is deprived of the memory of a lost home or the hope of a promised land. This divorce between man and his life, the actor and his setting, is properly the feeling of absurdity.” – Albert Camus

"...the pious hope that by combining numerous little turds of
variously tainted data, one can obtain a valuable result; but in fact, the
outcome is merely a larger than average pile of shit." Barash, David 1995.


This message is a reply to:
 Message 14 by nwr, posted 12-27-2012 2:35 PM nwr has acknowledged this reply

  
Rahvin
Member
Posts: 3964
Joined: 07-01-2005


Message 18 of 174 (685853)
12-27-2012 4:53 PM
Reply to: Message 16 by onifre
12-27-2012 4:04 PM


Re: Fine, here's some real advice...sort of.
I've had enormous success using the internet for dating. Not all of us are extroverts, after all. I don't like hanging out in bars; why would I want a woman who does?

The internet isn't just for social rejects who can't get a date, you know. It's also for people who like to have a filter for certain traits before even meeting to increase the chances of compatibility.


“The human understanding when it has once adopted an opinion (either as being the received opinion or as being agreeable to itself) draws all things else to support and agree with it.”
- Francis Bacon

"There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old's life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs." - John Rogers

“A world that can be explained even with bad reasons is a familiar world. But, on the other hand, in a universe suddenly divested of illusions and lights, man feels an alien, a stranger. His exile is without remedy since he is deprived of the memory of a lost home or the hope of a promised land. This divorce between man and his life, the actor and his setting, is properly the feeling of absurdity.” – Albert Camus

"...the pious hope that by combining numerous little turds of
variously tainted data, one can obtain a valuable result; but in fact, the
outcome is merely a larger than average pile of shit." Barash, David 1995.


This message is a reply to:
 Message 16 by onifre, posted 12-27-2012 4:04 PM onifre has responded

Replies to this message:
 Message 19 by onifre, posted 12-27-2012 5:30 PM Rahvin has responded

  
Rahvin
Member
Posts: 3964
Joined: 07-01-2005


(2)
Message 20 of 174 (685863)
12-27-2012 5:38 PM
Reply to: Message 19 by onifre
12-27-2012 5:30 PM


Re: Fine, here's some real advice...sort of.
I've never used it myself. But friends who have used OKCupid and things like that have mainly used it for one night stands. It's an easy way to hook up for meaningless sex, and I guess cheaper than a hooker in some cases.

I don't know any who have built a lasting relationship from it. Mostly because, if I were to guess, they lack actual social skills and a personality once they become themselves and let down the fake person they pretended to be on the internet.

Every relationship I've had for more than the past decade has started online. Not one has been a one-night stand. One of them lasted over five years.

Online dating is not at all different from the traditional kind. It just lets you expose yourself and be exposed to more people. Yes, that means there are more crazies and more competition, but the distribution is the same, you're just using a larger pool. And the ability to filter results by location, age, and interest helps the process move along quite well.

I'm not lacking in personality, and neither have any of the women I've dated from dating sites been without personality or social skills. Neither have they been sex-starved desperate sluts, any more than I'm a man-whore.

The stigma placed on online dating is undeserved.

My current relationship began with an online dating site, and my girlfriend is absolutely not a source of "meaningless sex," and neither is she simply "cheaper than a hooker." In fact, I find those characterizations of the women found on online dating sites to be extremely offensive.


“The human understanding when it has once adopted an opinion (either as being the received opinion or as being agreeable to itself) draws all things else to support and agree with it.”
- Francis Bacon

"There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old's life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs." - John Rogers

“A world that can be explained even with bad reasons is a familiar world. But, on the other hand, in a universe suddenly divested of illusions and lights, man feels an alien, a stranger. His exile is without remedy since he is deprived of the memory of a lost home or the hope of a promised land. This divorce between man and his life, the actor and his setting, is properly the feeling of absurdity.” – Albert Camus

"...the pious hope that by combining numerous little turds of
variously tainted data, one can obtain a valuable result; but in fact, the
outcome is merely a larger than average pile of shit." Barash, David 1995.


This message is a reply to:
 Message 19 by onifre, posted 12-27-2012 5:30 PM onifre has responded

Replies to this message:
 Message 21 by onifre, posted 12-27-2012 5:55 PM Rahvin has responded

  
Rahvin
Member
Posts: 3964
Joined: 07-01-2005


Message 22 of 174 (685866)
12-27-2012 6:01 PM
Reply to: Message 21 by onifre
12-27-2012 5:55 PM


Re: Fine, here's some real advice...sort of.
I can see in today's busy culture, the need to make all the initial setting up of a date online. You can also narrow down the field a bit, if that's what you like to do. But foreveryoung is talking about some other shit in other countries that isn't dating at all.

The first one was the reason I moved to California...from North Carolina. For a year we had 3000 miles between us, and the only "dates" we had were phone conversations until I flew out to meet her in person.

Long-distance relationships can work too, you know. It's just more difficult and takes extra commitment.

Interestingly enough, I was talking about mostly female comics who troll for men and use the sites for casual sex. Seems like it's the men who are the hookers for my female friends.

Okay, that's pretty funny.

And admittedly, some dating sites make "hookups" extremely easy, and some even cater specifically to that. My only issue is when that subset of online dating is used to generalize all of online dating. Most of it is a lot more like regular dating than people seem to think.


“The human understanding when it has once adopted an opinion (either as being the received opinion or as being agreeable to itself) draws all things else to support and agree with it.”
- Francis Bacon

"There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old's life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs." - John Rogers

“A world that can be explained even with bad reasons is a familiar world. But, on the other hand, in a universe suddenly divested of illusions and lights, man feels an alien, a stranger. His exile is without remedy since he is deprived of the memory of a lost home or the hope of a promised land. This divorce between man and his life, the actor and his setting, is properly the feeling of absurdity.” – Albert Camus

"...the pious hope that by combining numerous little turds of
variously tainted data, one can obtain a valuable result; but in fact, the
outcome is merely a larger than average pile of shit." Barash, David 1995.


This message is a reply to:
 Message 21 by onifre, posted 12-27-2012 5:55 PM onifre has responded

Replies to this message:
 Message 23 by onifre, posted 12-27-2012 7:22 PM Rahvin has not yet responded

  
Rahvin
Member
Posts: 3964
Joined: 07-01-2005


(2)
Message 132 of 174 (695060)
04-02-2013 11:39 AM
Reply to: Message 131 by Dr Adequate
04-02-2013 10:06 AM


That's why God created spiders.

Also, accelerants. Because you can't be sure it's dead unless the flames were at least 5 feet high.

I hate spiders. This is why I think we should nuke Australia from orbit - it's the only way to be sure. Possibly also South America.

Anyway, to FEY - good luck as your long-distance relationship takes the most important step of all: the first in-person meeting.


“The human understanding when it has once adopted an opinion (either as being the received opinion or as being agreeable to itself) draws all things else to support and agree with it.” - Francis Bacon

"There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old's life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs." - John Rogers

“A world that can be explained even with bad reasons is a familiar world. But, on the other hand, in a universe suddenly divested of illusions and lights, man feels an alien, a stranger. His exile is without remedy since he is deprived of the memory of a lost home or the hope of a promised land. This divorce between man and his life, the actor and his setting, is properly the feeling of absurdity.” – Albert Camus

"...the pious hope that by combining numerous little turds of variously tainted data, one can obtain a valuable result; but in fact, the outcome is merely a larger than average pile of shit." - Barash, David 1995.


This message is a reply to:
 Message 131 by Dr Adequate, posted 04-02-2013 10:06 AM Dr Adequate has not yet responded

Replies to this message:
 Message 133 by dronestar, posted 04-02-2013 12:13 PM Rahvin has not yet responded

  
Newer Topic | Older Topic
Jump to:


Copyright 2001-2018 by EvC Forum, All Rights Reserved

™ Version 4.0 Beta
Innovative software from Qwixotic © 2019