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Author Topic:   Humour VIII
AZPaul3
Member
Posts: 4817
From: Phoenix
Joined: 11-06-2006
Member Rating: 4.8


Message 7 of 1162 (714560)
12-23-2013 6:28 PM
Reply to: Message 5 by ringo
12-23-2013 11:53 AM


Re: Anode
Geaux ringeaux.


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AZPaul3
Member
Posts: 4817
From: Phoenix
Joined: 11-06-2006
Member Rating: 4.8


Message 24 of 1162 (716388)
01-15-2014 3:02 PM
Reply to: Message 21 by Shield
01-15-2014 11:21 AM


Re: Observing the 2nd amendment
OK, I admit it. This one passed through one ear and out the other without contacting anything in between.

I see a modern-day urban sasquatch on a subway platform carrying a purse and a book bag. Somewhere in there I missed the Constitutional implications. Eh ... wha?


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AZPaul3
Member
Posts: 4817
From: Phoenix
Joined: 11-06-2006
Member Rating: 4.8


Message 26 of 1162 (716390)
01-15-2014 3:10 PM
Reply to: Message 25 by PaulK
01-15-2014 3:04 PM


Re: Observing the 2nd amendment
The right to arm bears.

OooK.

Riiight.

Uh ... well, maybe I should consider that this one just is not going to connect until about 3 AM, maybe.

Thanks for trying Paul.

Edited by AZPaul3, : No reason given.


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AZPaul3
Member
Posts: 4817
From: Phoenix
Joined: 11-06-2006
Member Rating: 4.8


(1)
Message 32 of 1162 (716412)
01-16-2014 7:24 AM
Reply to: Message 27 by Modulous
01-15-2014 3:39 PM


Re: Observing the 2nd amendment
I knew that! I really really did!

I was just ... eh ... testing ... uh ... something.

Its enough to give one

paws.

Oh, gawd.

Edited by AZPaul3, : No reason given.


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AZPaul3
Member
Posts: 4817
From: Phoenix
Joined: 11-06-2006
Member Rating: 4.8


(1)
Message 40 of 1162 (716557)
01-18-2014 11:26 PM
Reply to: Message 39 by RAZD
01-18-2014 10:59 PM


Re: Copy this right away
Have copied and will hand out at work. Thanks RAZD. This is just what I need to keep my reputation in the office. It's been a bit of a dry spell since the Mayan apocalypse aluminum hat.

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AZPaul3
Member
Posts: 4817
From: Phoenix
Joined: 11-06-2006
Member Rating: 4.8


(1)
Message 42 of 1162 (717455)
01-27-2014 5:34 PM
Reply to: Message 39 by RAZD
01-18-2014 10:59 PM


Re: Copy this right away
RAZD,

Just an FYI. I took your chain letter, shrunk it to fit 6 to a page and made 18 bundles of 5 paperclipped together. Last Monday I handed them out on the first floor of our building saying this was a chain letter, please follow the instructions for me, etc. Good chuckle.

Today I saw some up on the second and third floors. It bred. Then I saw a bundle (not one of mine by the looks) up on the fourth floor sitting in our chairman's briefcase!

This was fun. Thank you.


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AZPaul3
Member
Posts: 4817
From: Phoenix
Joined: 11-06-2006
Member Rating: 4.8


(3)
Message 65 of 1162 (719149)
02-11-2014 7:17 PM
Reply to: Message 64 by Percy
02-11-2014 2:38 PM


Pesto Be Onto You

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AZPaul3
Member
Posts: 4817
From: Phoenix
Joined: 11-06-2006
Member Rating: 4.8


(1)
Message 69 of 1162 (719462)
02-14-2014 9:01 AM
Reply to: Message 68 by RAZD
02-14-2014 8:14 AM


Re: what deep time?
I have to agree with Calvin. I didn't know the answer to that one either.

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AZPaul3
Member
Posts: 4817
From: Phoenix
Joined: 11-06-2006
Member Rating: 4.8


Message 73 of 1162 (719503)
02-14-2014 3:34 PM
Reply to: Message 70 by Theodoric
02-14-2014 9:50 AM


Re: what deep time?
Think Tea

Oh, I did look it up in google just prior to turning on my computer this morning but with the ebb and flow of time in this universe that was after finishing my second coffee of the day which is almost done brewing.


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AZPaul3
Member
Posts: 4817
From: Phoenix
Joined: 11-06-2006
Member Rating: 4.8


(1)
Message 97 of 1162 (721142)
03-04-2014 6:31 AM
Reply to: Message 96 by Atheos canadensis
03-03-2014 9:56 PM


Re: Did you know...
Heh, I see what you did there.

Well, as long as we're on the subject:

Three men were discussing aging at the nursing home. "Sixty is the worst age to be," said the 60-year-old. You always feel like you have to pee. And most of the time, you stand at the toilet and nothing comes out!"

"Ah, that's nothin'," said the 70-year-old. "When you're seventy, you can't even go anymore. You take laxatives, eat bran, you sit on the toilet all day and nothin' comes out!"

"Actually," said the 80-year-old, "Eighty is the worst age of all."

"Do you have trouble peeing too?" asked the 60-year-old.

"No, not really. I pee every morning at 6:00. I pee like a racehorse on a flat rock; no problem at all."

"Do you have trouble go'ing?"

"No, I go every morning at 6:30."

With great exasperation, the 60-year-old said, "Let me get this straight. You pee every morning at 6:00 and go every morning at 6:30. So what's so tough about being 80?"

"I don't wake up until 7:00."


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AZPaul3
Member
Posts: 4817
From: Phoenix
Joined: 11-06-2006
Member Rating: 4.8


(1)
Message 99 of 1162 (721240)
03-05-2014 1:35 PM
Reply to: Message 98 by Diomedes
03-05-2014 12:17 PM


Re: From Slashdot
Hypophallus Trichomon-Morphic Ligase.

His dick don'T coMe up at alL

Her Tits Made me Laugh

Edited by AZPaul3, : No reason given.

Edited by AZPaul3, : No reason given.

Edited by AZPaul3, : No reason given.


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AZPaul3
Member
Posts: 4817
From: Phoenix
Joined: 11-06-2006
Member Rating: 4.8


(2)
Message 138 of 1162 (724500)
04-17-2014 5:10 PM
Reply to: Message 137 by Diomedes
04-17-2014 5:05 PM


Twenty bucks says every one of those laws have been violated more than once at Mardi Gras ...

... on the street in late afternoon with 40 people standing around cheering.

No, no bet. Been there. Done that.


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AZPaul3
Member
Posts: 4817
From: Phoenix
Joined: 11-06-2006
Member Rating: 4.8


Message 278 of 1162 (748341)
01-24-2015 8:58 PM


OK, you’re watching your favorite football team (American football) when one of the zebras throws his little yellow hankie. While the two announcers drone on about how this penalty call might be a bit off the camera is following the coach charging up and down the sideline pointing and screaming at the ref. His lips are going but you just can’t make out what he is screaming. You’d give a six-pack, cold, to know what he is saying.

Someone took the videos and did a lip read on some of these situations. The link below will take you to YouTube.

I’m putting this in Humor because some of these things are down-right unbelievable. Good lord, did he really just say that?

If you watch the lips of the person closely during the voiceover you can see clearly that the lip reader got it right!

Caution though. If you have tender sensibilities you … well …

Lip Read


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AZPaul3
Member
Posts: 4817
From: Phoenix
Joined: 11-06-2006
Member Rating: 4.8


Message 321 of 1162 (756623)
04-23-2015 9:44 PM
Reply to: Message 317 by Dr Adequate
04-23-2015 12:18 PM


Re: Checkmate, Christians
Ignorance respects no religion, or lack thereof.

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AZPaul3
Member
Posts: 4817
From: Phoenix
Joined: 11-06-2006
Member Rating: 4.8


(1)
Message 341 of 1162 (760591)
06-23-2015 2:43 PM
Reply to: Message 340 by RAZD
06-23-2015 9:21 AM


Re: silicon philosophy
I guess Johnny was right. I didn't understand the joke and I don't understand the explanation. But then this is philosophy and if it isn't obscure then the philosopher has not done his job properly.

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