AZPaul3 writes:
They are not special privileges or special rights per se but are a deferential treatment in society. It is a level of personal and professional respect one receives over others just by being a white male.
I largely agree with your analysis of white privilege and the need for white men to put away the resentment and paranoia. But the most important and insidious aspect to white privilege is that it doesn't depend on personal bias. Systemic inequities disadvantage nonwhites and women in ways that have nothing to do with interpersonal animus.
Don't get me wrong, I think it's important for white males to examine their unacknowledged biases and be conscientious about the way they address and interact with nonwhites and women. But the larger problem is that the legacy of slavery, Jim Crow, mass incarceration and female disenfranchisement have left the playing field so far from level that being really nice to one another isn't going to improve anything at the deeper social level.
Here's what I mean. There's a study going around about the way resumes bearing white-sounding names get picked by personnel recruiters much more often than those with ethnic-sounding names. I don't dispute this finding, and I think there's still a lot of racial bias in hiring and advancement. But the point is that
even if there weren't names on the resumes at all, the ones from white candidates are more likely to be chosen because the nonwhite candidates have been disadvantaged in education, experience, credit history, the justice system, and many other factors by which employers assess candidates. Whites have gained advantage in an unfair system, so of course their accomplishments are going to be more considerable.
When the affirmative action program was instituted to try to rectify this unfair advantage, white men raised holy hell over the same perception of "reverse discrimination" that people have mentioned here. Part of white privilege is the resentment of admitting that the white man's supremacy hasn't been earned through fair competition in a meritocracy, but because of inequities which have been constantly reinforced over the course of centuries.