Understanding through Discussion


Welcome! You are not logged in. [ Login ]
EvC Forum active members: 81 (8905 total)
Current session began: 
Page Loaded: 04-19-2019 11:03 PM
27 online now:
Chatting now:  Chat room empty
Newest Member: WookieeB
Post Volume:
Total: 849,854 Year: 4,891/19,786 Month: 1,013/873 Week: 369/376 Day: 46/116 Hour: 0/6


Thread  Details

Email This Thread
Newer Topic | Older Topic
  
1
2345Next
Author Topic:   Teaching Children Both Sides
Dragoness
Member (Idle past 4172 days)
Posts: 51
From: SLT, CA
Joined: 06-21-2007


Message 1 of 62 (414236)
08-03-2007 3:08 PM


This is a personal topic I would like to see if I can open, not sure which forum it belongs in. If its not acceptable for the forum I understand, but I thought this would be a good place to get the information I seek.

I have a 5 year old (6 next month) and she just asked me (in order)

1. How did the dinosaurs die?
so I explained what a theory was and the one about that asteroid hitting the earth and that it was a widely accepted theory

2. How were humans created?
So I explained that it depened on what you believed, then gave her explantions of evolution and creation in a nutshell.

3. How did I get in your tummy?
I told her to ask when shes older

4. Who is God?
I gave her a short answer about many people believed that God is the creater of all life, she asked if I believed that. I explained that I beleive in evolution and daddy believes in creation/God.

5. Was God a real person?
At this point I told her it was better to ask her daddy because I didn't know enough about God to give her the correct answers. I also told her I would be more than happy to talk about evolution.

So my husband and I have decided to start teaching both sides and let her choose her own path.

Can anyone here tell me if they have faced this delima? How did you handle it?
Can anyone offer tips on how to teach both sides impartially?

Can anyone offer any feedback they have on this situation?

I really thought I had another year or two before this happened.


Replies to this message:
 Message 3 by Hyroglyphx, posted 08-03-2007 4:20 PM Dragoness has not yet responded
 Message 4 by arachnophilia, posted 08-03-2007 5:32 PM Dragoness has not yet responded
 Message 5 by AnswersInGenitals, posted 08-03-2007 5:38 PM Dragoness has not yet responded
 Message 6 by Chiroptera, posted 08-03-2007 5:39 PM Dragoness has not yet responded
 Message 7 by ringo, posted 08-03-2007 5:55 PM Dragoness has responded
 Message 9 by RAZD, posted 08-03-2007 6:15 PM Dragoness has responded
 Message 17 by anastasia, posted 08-03-2007 8:30 PM Dragoness has not yet responded
 Message 18 by dwise1, posted 08-03-2007 8:49 PM Dragoness has responded
 Message 19 by Doddy, posted 08-03-2007 9:05 PM Dragoness has not yet responded
 Message 23 by anglagard, posted 08-04-2007 10:42 AM Dragoness has not yet responded
 Message 24 by Ben!, posted 08-04-2007 11:20 AM Dragoness has not yet responded
 Message 26 by Taz, posted 08-06-2007 3:19 PM Dragoness has not yet responded
 Message 27 by sketches, posted 08-06-2007 3:36 PM Dragoness has not yet responded
 Message 31 by EighteenDelta, posted 08-16-2007 3:54 PM Dragoness has not yet responded

    
AdminNem
Inactive Member


Message 2 of 62 (414253)
08-03-2007 4:11 PM


Thread moved here from the Proposed New Topics forum.
  
Hyroglyphx
Member
Posts: 5622
From: Austin, TX
Joined: 05-03-2006


Message 3 of 62 (414255)
08-03-2007 4:20 PM
Reply to: Message 1 by Dragoness
08-03-2007 3:08 PM


The best approach
So my husband and I have decided to start teaching both sides and let her choose her own path.

Can anyone here tell me if they have faced this delima? How did you handle it?
Can anyone offer tips on how to teach both sides impartially?

I think you and your husband are making the right decision, given the circumstances.

My daughter (8) has asked me about similar questions. I tell her what her parents beliefs are. She is aware that evolution is taught in the schools and that her Mom and I disagree with that theory. But we don't go in to too much detail, yet, because she doesn't seem to actually care all that much.

Right now, both our kids are inquisitive about everything. You have a unique circumstance where the parents beliefs differ considerably. If I were in your circumstance though, I wouldn't change the approach you are taking now. Its commendable because it doesn't heap on her undue stress about things that she doesn't really need to give great thought on right now.

Aside from that, does she have any specific questions, or are they just sort of generalized questions about her origins?

I really thought I had another year or two before this happened.

Yeah, welcome to the club :P

Edited by nemesis_juggernaut, : Added a sub-title


"It is not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled, or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena; whose face is marred by the dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions and spends himself in a worthy course; who at the best, knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who, at worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly; so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory or defeat." -Theodore Roosevelt


This message is a reply to:
 Message 1 by Dragoness, posted 08-03-2007 3:08 PM Dragoness has not yet responded

    
arachnophilia
Member (Idle past 83 days)
Posts: 9069
From: god's waiting room
Joined: 05-21-2004


Message 4 of 62 (414270)
08-03-2007 5:32 PM
Reply to: Message 1 by Dragoness
08-03-2007 3:08 PM


you missed one!
1. How did the dinosaurs die?
so I explained what a theory was and the one about that asteroid hitting the earth and that it was a widely accepted theory

i'd like to point out that there is some scientific debate about this subject...


אָרַח

This message is a reply to:
 Message 1 by Dragoness, posted 08-03-2007 3:08 PM Dragoness has not yet responded

  
AnswersInGenitals
Member
Posts: 509
Joined: 07-20-2006


Message 5 of 62 (414272)
08-03-2007 5:38 PM
Reply to: Message 1 by Dragoness
08-03-2007 3:08 PM


This sounds like an excellent opportunity and situation for teaching your daughter that different groups of people often have different views and beliefs about many subjects and that this is not a bad thing. In fact, it usually is a very good thing, allowing the people to get together and discuss their different views which can lead to deeper understanding. This forum is a great example of that. So it is perfectly fine for her to hold opinions that differ from others, even from most other people, but that it is just as important to respect other peoples rights to their opinions.

You should also keep in mind that children at this age often ask questions and want answers that are very broad but not very deep. In part, they are learning how to ask questions and the answers are incidental.

I really thought I had another year or two before this happened.

Fasten your seat-belt D, it's going to be a bumpy ride.


This message is a reply to:
 Message 1 by Dragoness, posted 08-03-2007 3:08 PM Dragoness has not yet responded

  
Chiroptera
Member
Posts: 6531
From: Oklahoma
Joined: 09-28-2003


Message 6 of 62 (414273)
08-03-2007 5:39 PM
Reply to: Message 1 by Dragoness
08-03-2007 3:08 PM


I personally don't think you'll be doing your kids any favors pretending that your husband's beliefs count as a reasonable viewpoint.

But mine might be a minority opinion.


I've done everything the Bible says, even the stuff that contradicts the other stuff! -- Ned Flanders
This message is a reply to:
 Message 1 by Dragoness, posted 08-03-2007 3:08 PM Dragoness has not yet responded

  
ringo
Member
Posts: 16333
From: frozen wasteland
Joined: 03-23-2005
Member Rating: 3.4


Message 7 of 62 (414276)
08-03-2007 5:55 PM
Reply to: Message 1 by Dragoness
08-03-2007 3:08 PM


What do you tell her about Santa Claus or the Tooth Fairy?

I told her to ask when shes older

I'd say it's best to tell them when they ask.


Help scientific research in your spare time. No cost. No obligation.
Join the World Community Grid with Team EvC
This message is a reply to:
 Message 1 by Dragoness, posted 08-03-2007 3:08 PM Dragoness has responded

Replies to this message:
 Message 8 by Dragoness, posted 08-03-2007 6:12 PM ringo has not yet responded

  
Dragoness
Member (Idle past 4172 days)
Posts: 51
From: SLT, CA
Joined: 06-21-2007


Message 8 of 62 (414279)
08-03-2007 6:12 PM
Reply to: Message 7 by ringo
08-03-2007 5:55 PM


I guess I should explain that she knows all about how life is formed. She understands that mommy has an egg that is fertilized by daddy and the egg grows into a baby bit my bit. She knows how a baby develops from week to week and grows larger, and she knows precisly how babies are born, both vaginally and by c-section.
What she wanted to know was exactly HOW the baby got in there and I don't think at 5 she is old enough to learn about sex, so I choose to delay the question for when she is older. That is my decision as a parent.
This message is a reply to:
 Message 7 by ringo, posted 08-03-2007 5:55 PM ringo has not yet responded

Replies to this message:
 Message 10 by RAZD, posted 08-03-2007 6:20 PM Dragoness has responded
 Message 12 by sidelined, posted 08-03-2007 6:26 PM Dragoness has responded
 Message 13 by Asgara, posted 08-03-2007 6:28 PM Dragoness has not yet responded

    
RAZD
Member
Posts: 19811
From: the other end of the sidewalk
Joined: 03-14-2004
Member Rating: 10.0


Message 9 of 62 (414283)
08-03-2007 6:15 PM
Reply to: Message 1 by Dragoness
08-03-2007 3:08 PM


Both? BOTH???
So my husband and I have decided to start teaching both sides and let her choose her own path.

To be blunt there is no "both sides" to the issue. This phrase always bothers me because there is no dichotomy, no "either (A) or (B)" involved. There is science (which includes evolution), philosophy (which includes logic and skepticism and other aspects of critical thinking) and there is theology (which includes all the world religions plus atheism and agnosticism, not just your husbands preferred brand).

You should also teach her that mommy and daddy are not necessarily authorities on these issues either, and that as she gets older she can pursue these questions further.

I really thought I had another year or two before this happened.

Been there.

Enjoy.


Join the effort to unravel AIDS/HIV, unfold Proteomes, fight Cancer,
compare Fiocruz Genome and fight Muscular Dystrophy with Team EvC! (click)


we are limited in our ability to understand
by our ability to understand
RebelAAmericanOZen[Deist
... to learn ... to think ... to live ... to laugh ...
to share.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 1 by Dragoness, posted 08-03-2007 3:08 PM Dragoness has responded

Replies to this message:
 Message 11 by Hyroglyphx, posted 08-03-2007 6:25 PM RAZD has not yet responded
 Message 14 by Dragoness, posted 08-03-2007 6:30 PM RAZD has not yet responded

  
RAZD
Member
Posts: 19811
From: the other end of the sidewalk
Joined: 03-14-2004
Member Rating: 10.0


Message 10 of 62 (414287)
08-03-2007 6:20 PM
Reply to: Message 8 by Dragoness
08-03-2007 6:12 PM


Sex for Six year olds
She understands that mommy has an egg that is fertilized by daddy and the egg grows into a baby bit my bit.

You can tell here that the egg is already in you and that the sperm is implanted through a process called intercourse (sex).

Edited by RAZD, : subtittilation


Join the effort to unravel AIDS/HIV, unfold Proteomes, fight Cancer,
compare Fiocruz Genome and fight Muscular Dystrophy with Team EvC! (click)


we are limited in our ability to understand
by our ability to understand
RebelAAmericanOZen[Deist
... to learn ... to think ... to live ... to laugh ...
to share.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 8 by Dragoness, posted 08-03-2007 6:12 PM Dragoness has responded

Replies to this message:
 Message 15 by Dragoness, posted 08-03-2007 6:35 PM RAZD has not yet responded

  
Hyroglyphx
Member
Posts: 5622
From: Austin, TX
Joined: 05-03-2006


Message 11 of 62 (414288)
08-03-2007 6:25 PM
Reply to: Message 9 by RAZD
08-03-2007 6:15 PM


Re: Both? BOTH???
To be blunt there is no "both sides" to the issue. This phrase always bothers me because there is no dichotomy, no "either (A) or (B)" involved. There is science (which includes evolution), philosophy (which includes logic and skepticism and other aspects of critical thinking) and there is theology (which includes all the world religions plus atheism and agnosticism, not just your husbands preferred brand).

RAZD, there are many sides to the issue, not just A or B, or what you seem to be advocating (that only an (A) can exist). As well, you can't just say that evolution is a scientific theory, therefore A must somehow be unfalsifiable. Given the wide interpretation of evidence, there is no reason to justifiably assume that your way is the best way.

You should also teach her that mommy and daddy are not necessarily authorities on these issues either, and that as she gets older she can pursue these questions further.

This seems the most reasonable.


"It is not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled, or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena; whose face is marred by the dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions and spends himself in a worthy course; who at the best, knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who, at worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly; so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory or defeat." -Theodore Roosevelt


This message is a reply to:
 Message 9 by RAZD, posted 08-03-2007 6:15 PM RAZD has not yet responded

    
sidelined
Inactive Member


Message 12 of 62 (414289)
08-03-2007 6:26 PM
Reply to: Message 8 by Dragoness
08-03-2007 6:12 PM


Dragoness

What she wanted to know was exactly HOW the baby got in there and I don't think at 5 she is old enough to learn about sex, so I choose to delay the question for when she is older. That is my decision as a parent.

Well You could have some great fun by telling her Dad put the baby in there and then tell her to ask him how.


This message is a reply to:
 Message 8 by Dragoness, posted 08-03-2007 6:12 PM Dragoness has responded

Replies to this message:
 Message 16 by Dragoness, posted 08-03-2007 6:36 PM sidelined has not yet responded

  
Asgara
Member (Idle past 407 days)
Posts: 1783
From: Wisconsin, USA
Joined: 05-10-2003


Message 13 of 62 (414291)
08-03-2007 6:28 PM
Reply to: Message 8 by Dragoness
08-03-2007 6:12 PM


Dragoness,

My daughter was 5 when she asked how the sperm got to the egg. I told her in a very straightforward manner, and she laughed for a week.

Edited by Asgara, : this sentence no verb


This message is a reply to:
 Message 8 by Dragoness, posted 08-03-2007 6:12 PM Dragoness has not yet responded

    
Dragoness
Member (Idle past 4172 days)
Posts: 51
From: SLT, CA
Joined: 06-21-2007


Message 14 of 62 (414293)
08-03-2007 6:30 PM
Reply to: Message 9 by RAZD
08-03-2007 6:15 PM


Re: Both? BOTH???
The "both sides" I refer to are Evolution andCreation, Science and Religon. I know there are many many versions of each, but she is not even 6, so we will teach what we know for now. When she is ready she si free to explore other knowledge. We have taught her that mom and dad are not the only places to get answers, but right now we are the best place for her to start. She is our child.
This message is a reply to:
 Message 9 by RAZD, posted 08-03-2007 6:15 PM RAZD has not yet responded

    
Dragoness
Member (Idle past 4172 days)
Posts: 51
From: SLT, CA
Joined: 06-21-2007


Message 15 of 62 (414296)
08-03-2007 6:35 PM
Reply to: Message 10 by RAZD
08-03-2007 6:20 PM


Re: Sex for Six year olds
Thats just the thing, I do not feel she is ready to learn this detail, so no I should NOT "just tell her sex is intercourse"

I don't feel that anyone has a right to say when I should teach my child about intercourse, shes not even 6! Also, like another person said... their child laughed for a week. My daughter has many friends who are younger than her and I really don't thikn their parents would apprecieate their younger kids learning the bird and the bees from my child, I know for a fact it would be a disaster with these kids.


This message is a reply to:
 Message 10 by RAZD, posted 08-03-2007 6:20 PM RAZD has not yet responded

    
1
2345Next
Newer Topic | Older Topic
Jump to:


Copyright 2001-2018 by EvC Forum, All Rights Reserved

™ Version 4.0 Beta
Innovative software from Qwixotic © 2019