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Author Topic:   Gay marraige and the end of the world
berberry
Inactive Member


Message 91 of 195 (279216)
01-15-2006 7:37 PM
Reply to: Message 86 by riVeRraT
01-15-2006 1:58 PM


Re: History
I haven't had a lot of time lately, rat, and my time will continue to be limited. I'm responding to this message way out-of-sequence, but I reserve the right to respond to some earlier posts at any time.
quote:
So should we make it legal to have multiple wives also?
I mean whats the difference, if everyone consents, then its a go.
Although I've heard plausible arguments for allowing plural marriages, I'm not yet on board with it. I'm dealing with the gay marriage issue right now; inter-racial marriage has already been tackled (I certainly would have supported that back when everyone thought it was insulting to God) and any other changes to marriage are for another day. As I've said before many times, I'd sooner have the government out of the marriage business entirely and instead allow people to make whatever social contracts (civil unions or whatever) they wish, so long as they don't violate the rights of anyone else. Let the churches control what is and isn't a marriage within their own faith.
Think about that, rat. Why get the government involved at all? This change to marriage is bound to happen, and more changes will follow. Marriage was once nothing more than a property arrangement, as you've been discussing with some others in this very thread. Look how much it's changed since then, the latest fundamental change having come as recently as the 1960s. Did you expect that everything was just going to stop there? All societies between those ancient ones and ours today have been allowed to change the meaning of marriage as the needs of those societies changed. Did you expect that all of these changes would just suddenly stop?
Why should the government be responsible for any of these changes? Why not leave it up to the churches and simply let people make their civil unions or whatever style agreements they want, so long as they don't abuse their children or in any other way violate the rights of others? What compelling interest does the state have in endorsing the religious aspects of marriage?
-------------------------------------
I wish you'd go back and re-read some of your posts over the past 2 or 3 pages. You've been very insulting, whether you meant to be or not. I don't want to have to point it out to you. I want you to find it, but be advised I'm not going to let the issue drop. I'm still taking you at your word that you have no ill will or feelings of superiority over gay people. So do me the favor of looking back and seeing what you've said that I thought was insulting. You don't have to offer any explanation, just see if you can point anything out. I promise that if you can point it out, I'll keep the discussion friendly and won't get more than mildly angry with you.
Please do me this favor, rat.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 86 by riVeRraT, posted 01-15-2006 1:58 PM riVeRraT has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 92 by Silent H, posted 01-16-2006 5:19 AM berberry has replied
 Message 107 by riVeRraT, posted 01-16-2006 10:28 PM berberry has replied

  
Silent H
Member (Idle past 5849 days)
Posts: 7405
From: satellite of love
Joined: 12-11-2002


Message 92 of 195 (279370)
01-16-2006 5:19 AM
Reply to: Message 91 by berberry
01-15-2006 7:37 PM


Re: History
Although I've heard plausible arguments for allowing plural marriages, I'm not yet on board with it. I'm dealing with the gay marriage issue right now; inter-racial marriage has already been tackled (I certainly would have supported that back when everyone thought it was insulting to God) and any other changes to marriage are for another day.
I have heard the above statement before (by others) and it confuses me. What does "not on board" mean? Or how does it differ with Rat (or maybe someone less antagonistic) not "being on board" with gay marriage.
It sounds to me like a cop out, and it raises serious doubts in my mind whether people that claim the above would have been for interracial relationships any more than plural marriage. What would have been the difference then, as to now? They were both banned, yet you could be on board with one despite being busy with gay marriage, yet can't now for the other?
How much does it take to be "on board" with someone getting their rights, other than to simply not oppose any initiatives against those rights, and support any initiatives for such rights? It shouldn't take any more time out of your day than anything else you would be for. Obviously it would make sense that you wouldn't go out campaigning for such rights but that isn't what you'd want from conservatives on gay rights either, is it? You simply want them to get on board by not blocking, and instead throwing in support when they can at the voting booth, right?
If a conservative said to you, they can't get on board with gay marriage right now because they are busy with other issues (perhaps religious speech rights issues), would that make sense to you?
All societies between those ancient ones and ours today have been allowed to change the meaning of marriage as the needs of those societies changed. Did you expect that all of these changes would just suddenly stop?
Despite the inconsistent arguments made here (it wasn't exclusively about gaining property, or the ownership of women), I agree with the above statement. Regardless of what it may have "been about" at any time, it has certainly changed over time. And there is a good question in why change itself is somehow wrong or harmful, given that its history is of change in meaning.
I do agree as well that "marriage" might best be served by religious or other social institutions, but that is another topic. Assuming it is in the business, why can changes not be added, or why would they be harmful? This is something that tends to go unanswered by conservatives.
But to bring this back around, if it is true about change, why do you (berb) not see that marriage shouldn't stop with monogamous marriage, especially as a lot of the world has it right now, and has had it through history? We are currently denying actual 100% married people from enjoying their rights.
And if you can say "not yet, I'm busy", why can't conservatives say the same thing?

holmes
"...what a fool believes he sees, no wise man has the power to reason away.."(D. Bros)

This message is a reply to:
 Message 91 by berberry, posted 01-15-2006 7:37 PM berberry has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 93 by Funkaloyd, posted 01-16-2006 6:25 AM Silent H has replied
 Message 99 by berberry, posted 01-16-2006 9:41 AM Silent H has replied

  
Funkaloyd
Inactive Member


Message 93 of 195 (279372)
01-16-2006 6:25 AM
Reply to: Message 92 by Silent H
01-16-2006 5:19 AM


Re: History
holmes writes:
If a conservative said to you, they can't get on board with gay marriage right now because they are busy with other issues (perhaps religious speech rights issues), would that make sense to you?
Those are very different matters. If a conservative said that s/he's working on religious speech issues at the moment, and hate speech will have to wait, then that makes some sense.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 92 by Silent H, posted 01-16-2006 5:19 AM Silent H has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 95 by Silent H, posted 01-16-2006 8:34 AM Funkaloyd has replied

  
riVeRraT
Member (Idle past 445 days)
Posts: 5788
From: NY USA
Joined: 05-09-2004


Message 94 of 195 (279382)
01-16-2006 8:03 AM
Reply to: Message 88 by macaroniandcheese
01-15-2006 3:08 PM


Re: History
when of if they can each afford a wife, they don't either divorce the first. but are we really going to base our society's legal contracts on any of these old traditions?
Not really, but we can study them to understand where we came from. You can't just dis all of history just like that, and say we were ignorant all those years. Whatever it was that history was doing all those years, got us to this point in time.
Has there ever been a soceity in other than post modern times that allowed gay marriage?
outside of religious conviction, there is NO REASON to restrict marriage of any sort
But then you've missed what I have been saying all along. My feelings on this subject came initially from within myself, and what I experienced in life. Religion only comfirmed it for me.
Trust me, I am trying real hard here. I am a little upset with myself.
we give children in adoption to those who are willing and able to care for them.
Didn't you just say this?
quote:
marriage was never about children
And that legally children have nothing to do with marriage?
I almost think it is better for same sex couples to adopt children individually, instead of making 2 fathers, or 2 mothers, or even worse, a father who really is a mother, and a mother who really is a father.
Then if they should split, it is clear who will remain with the child.
In a straight marriage, the child usually goes to the mother, and the courst will stick up for the mother, unless there is an extreme circumstance. But usually if the mother says "I want to remain with my child," then she gets it.
some people want nothing to do with their natural parents because their natural parents are irresponsible or crazy or sick or abusive. are you suggesting that we should force these relationships because you liked your parents?
You weren't reading what I wrote. I said a loving responsible parent is what people desire.
I do not like my mother all that much. She cheated on my Dad, and my whole teenage life was spent listening to arguing, it was torture. I will not allow that to happen to my kids.
It hurt me tremdously, and goes against what my heart truely desired, to have a loving mother and father who are responsible about raising the children they choose to have.
How can you say marriage is not about children. How can you say legally it isn't. What about the phrase "illegitamate child".
What child doesn't suffer from being the child of a quick fuck?
Mom, change my name to quick fuck, because that is what I am.
I don't find that right either, and that is what I have been saying that need to change in this society also. We are stepping in the wrong direction.
It's like fixing the symptoms of a problem, instead of actually fixing the problem. If I did that in my business, I would surely lose many customers.
It is why I say it is not right.
it takes a lot more to build a relationship. i find it insulting that you would make marriage into this.
How can you say that?
People can get marriage liscense, but they don't need child liscenses. Well maybe we should impliment that.
Maybe we should working towards stopping millions of children from suffering. Instead of allowing gays to be married.
Maybe less people would actually be gay if we did this.
Yes, I know people who decided to be gay based on what went wrong with their parents, so don't tell me I am full of it.
show me a quote where jesus says this. jesus, not paul, not the old testament.
quote:
Mark 12:25
When the dead rise, they will neither marry nor be given in marriage; they will be like the angels in heaven.
Do you think when Jesus said marriage, in that verse, that he was talking about man, and a man?
Jesus didn't write any of the bible, so I don't know how you expect me to prove this. But this isn't a religious conversation per-say anyway.
I don't know about you, but after reading all the comments in the NT about marriage, and how they should work, I find nothing about man being with a man. It's pretty obvious, and to say different is just plain stupid.
further, one man, one woman. this says nothing of children which you keep pressing.
You don't have to say anyting. It takes one man, and one woman to make a child, period.
That child should have a right to be raised by just that, a biological mother, and a biological father, who have given themselves in marriage and commited their lives to raising the children the so responsibly decided to have.
That is the ideal situation, and deviating from that, to me, just doesn't make sense. We are creating new ways of dealing with this, instead of fixing it directly. The more ways we create to deal with this, the more it will happen.
It is also why I am against abortion in most cases, not all. Abortion can be ok in certain cases.
There is no incosistancey in my thinking, but that doesn't make my thinking correct either.
i dare say that science is probably close enough to making an ovum out of an ordinary cell.
OMG, that is horrible. You can start another thread on that one, whew.
I don't think we should base our morals on technology either, since technology is never proven, and isn't guaranteed to stay here.
it's half a step from the cloning they're doing. you just use the dna from the other woman's cell to fill the ovum.)
How would a person feel, really if they had to rely on technology to concieve a child?
I am sure that straight couples who turn to techology to have a baby, have feelings that need to be dealt with, in that they were not able to create one on their own.
I think I would feel pretty shitty about myself if I had to, and wonder what was wrong with me.
#1 because he does. it's not your place to force a woman and children on him just because you think it's right.
Not a good answer at all. Nobody forcing anything here. That is an insufficient answer.
you have no idea and yet you proclaim that she isn't really married cause she hasn't squirted anything loud out.
It's more about intention, than what is.
except for marriage. he's all about judging marriage. especially if you don't want to have kids.
He's not judging it, and I am not judging it. IT just simply is what is, not what you concieve it to be, or what you want to change it into.
That is where you do not understand me, or Jesus. I don't even think your being honest with yourself. Of course this may be a judgmental ignorant statement, but it is what I feel and I shared it with you, don't be angry, but explain to me why I am wrong.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 88 by macaroniandcheese, posted 01-15-2006 3:08 PM macaroniandcheese has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 96 by nator, posted 01-16-2006 8:43 AM riVeRraT has replied
 Message 98 by crashfrog, posted 01-16-2006 9:27 AM riVeRraT has not replied
 Message 102 by macaroniandcheese, posted 01-16-2006 12:58 PM riVeRraT has replied

  
Silent H
Member (Idle past 5849 days)
Posts: 7405
From: satellite of love
Joined: 12-11-2002


Message 95 of 195 (279383)
01-16-2006 8:34 AM
Reply to: Message 93 by Funkaloyd
01-16-2006 6:25 AM


Re: History
Those are very different matters. If a conservative said that s/he's working on religious speech issues at the moment, and hate speech will have to wait, then that makes some sense.
??? The question is of being able to support any secondary issue right? That is a gay issue can trump some other issue, just as any other issue can trump any gay issue.
It would not make any logical sense to say one should be able to support gay marriage even if they are currently working on religious issues, if a person can claim they do not have to support any other issue (including poly marriage) because they are currently working on gay marriage.
I even said "other issues" and then suggested the possibility of an issue.

holmes
"...what a fool believes he sees, no wise man has the power to reason away.."(D. Bros)

This message is a reply to:
 Message 93 by Funkaloyd, posted 01-16-2006 6:25 AM Funkaloyd has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 97 by Funkaloyd, posted 01-16-2006 9:18 AM Silent H has replied

  
nator
Member (Idle past 2199 days)
Posts: 12961
From: Ann Arbor
Joined: 12-09-2001


Message 96 of 195 (279384)
01-16-2006 8:43 AM
Reply to: Message 94 by riVeRraT
01-16-2006 8:03 AM


Re: History
Rat, did you "decide" to be straight?
Or did you just always like girls?
quote:
That child should have a right to be raised by just that, a biological mother, and a biological father, who have given themselves in marriage and commited their lives to raising the children the so responsibly decided to have.
That is the ideal situation, and deviating from that, to me, just doesn't make sense.
Since when has this been the norm in any society?
It wasn't the norm in Biblical times. People lived in big, extended families; it was a tribal, clan-based culture, right? Men had multiple wives for much of that time as well.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 94 by riVeRraT, posted 01-16-2006 8:03 AM riVeRraT has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 109 by riVeRraT, posted 01-16-2006 10:36 PM nator has replied

  
Funkaloyd
Inactive Member


Message 97 of 195 (279386)
01-16-2006 9:18 AM
Reply to: Message 95 by Silent H
01-16-2006 8:34 AM


Priorities
It's a strategic thing. Some believe that gay marriage trumps other freedoms of a similar nature which are arguably less popular (even to the point of being detrimental to the movement) and less pressing at the moment.
So, one might say "today we fight for the preacher's right to speak freely; the fascist's right to speak freely can wait until tomorrow"; or "today we fight for gay marriage, tomorrow for polygamy".

This message is a reply to:
 Message 95 by Silent H, posted 01-16-2006 8:34 AM Silent H has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 100 by Silent H, posted 01-16-2006 10:59 AM Funkaloyd has not replied

  
crashfrog
Member (Idle past 1496 days)
Posts: 19762
From: Silver Spring, MD
Joined: 03-20-2003


Message 98 of 195 (279388)
01-16-2006 9:27 AM
Reply to: Message 94 by riVeRraT
01-16-2006 8:03 AM


Doesn't make sense
So, what you're saying is that gay people shouldn't be allowed to form married families and raise children, because your straight parents completely failed at it?

This message is a reply to:
 Message 94 by riVeRraT, posted 01-16-2006 8:03 AM riVeRraT has not replied

  
berberry
Inactive Member


Message 99 of 195 (279391)
01-16-2006 9:41 AM
Reply to: Message 92 by Silent H
01-16-2006 5:19 AM


Re: History
holmes writes me:
quote:
It sounds to me like a cop out, and it raises serious doubts in my mind whether people that claim the above would have been for interracial relationships any more than plural marriage.
Well, of course I don't know for sure what I'd have done if I'd been older at the time when miscegenation was the big marital issue, but since I've always been sensitive to civil rights matters I think I'm on safe ground assuming that I'd have been in support. I'm also not sure how I would have felt about gay marriage had that issue come up in discussion concurrent to miscegenation. Since the Stonewall incident is roughly contemporary with Loving vs. Virginia (if I remember my legal history correctly), it's conceivable that the issue might have been discussed by someone somewhere. But I think it'd have been crazy to support gay marriage at that time - at least actively - and would have done nothing but drive further away anyone you might have been trying to convince that there was no harm in miscegenation.
In other words, I'm "not on board" with either the pro- or the anti- just now. If someone I cared about was in a Jules & Jim type relationship and seemed to be happy I would certainly support his or her right to pursue that relationship, even with legal recognition, but as yet I don't know any such person and so I'm not particularly concerned. My mind is still open to whatever might come up, but I'm not going to risk freaking out the Christians anymore than necessary just now. Doing so wouldn't do much to serve either cause, at least as I see it.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 92 by Silent H, posted 01-16-2006 5:19 AM Silent H has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 101 by Silent H, posted 01-16-2006 11:13 AM berberry has not replied

  
Silent H
Member (Idle past 5849 days)
Posts: 7405
From: satellite of love
Joined: 12-11-2002


Message 100 of 195 (279411)
01-16-2006 10:59 AM
Reply to: Message 97 by Funkaloyd
01-16-2006 9:18 AM


Re: Priorities
It's a strategic thing. Some believe that gay marriage trumps other freedoms of a similar nature which are arguably less popular (even to the point of being detrimental to the movement) and less pressing at the moment.
I understand what you are saying, but that does not answer the question I was asking, especially to berberry who is on record suggesting the blacks should not be unsupportive of gays fighting for equal rights, even though it is detrimental to their movement.

holmes
"...what a fool believes he sees, no wise man has the power to reason away.."(D. Bros)

This message is a reply to:
 Message 97 by Funkaloyd, posted 01-16-2006 9:18 AM Funkaloyd has not replied

  
Silent H
Member (Idle past 5849 days)
Posts: 7405
From: satellite of love
Joined: 12-11-2002


Message 101 of 195 (279413)
01-16-2006 11:13 AM
Reply to: Message 99 by berberry
01-16-2006 9:41 AM


Re: History
I understand your reasoning, but I find it a cop out. Rights are fought for or they are not. You support them or you do not. Saying I'll help a group oppress another if it will buy my group some space is perhaps strategic, but gutless (to me).
As far as your reason why it is not compelling, if a person said they know no one in a gay relationship, and so are unconcerned, would that sit well with you as a reason for them not to say "okay, they should have that right"?
Likewise you have recently been critical of blacks that are critical of gays latching on to their civil rights efforts, yet here you seem to defend that very attitude (stonewell/loving).
Shouldn't all groups looking for freedom using the same criteria band together to create a block with a single agenda, rather than stabbing other groups in the back in order to "pass" inspection for Xians?
And I might add that your very argument is self-defeating as it lends credence to what Xian leaders (even those in govt like Scalia) are saying. Once we have gay rights there will be calls for more rights from these other groups, and precedence to give it to them.
Your only choice then is to tell these rabid fundamentalists that you promise not to help those others in the future, and only your group will get the rights others request, or to pretend that like you will stab the other group in the back and only to come out as a liar to the zealots instead... who will not take that lightly.
Why is a forthright approach, not the most honest and worthy approach to human rights? Especially at the level we are currently discussing?

holmes
"...what a fool believes he sees, no wise man has the power to reason away.."(D. Bros)

This message is a reply to:
 Message 99 by berberry, posted 01-16-2006 9:41 AM berberry has not replied

  
macaroniandcheese 
Suspended Member (Idle past 3957 days)
Posts: 4258
Joined: 05-24-2004


Message 102 of 195 (279448)
01-16-2006 12:58 PM
Reply to: Message 94 by riVeRraT
01-16-2006 8:03 AM


Re: History
People can get marriage liscense, but they don't need child liscenses. Well maybe we should impliment that.
Maybe we should working towards stopping millions of children from suffering. Instead of allowing gays to be married.
Maybe less people would actually be gay if we did this.
Yes, I know people who decided to be gay based on what went wrong with their parents, so don't tell me I am full of it.
you're full of it.
children sufferring has NOTHING to do with gay marriage. why do you keep trying to find ways to make less people gay? don't you get that that makes you intolerant? i mean. maybe there's some gay person out there who doesn't want to be gay, but the ones i've met are content. sure. have parenting licences. i've been supporting that for years. but it's difficult to enforce outside of fines. but what i was responding to was your claims of schraf's marriage being "not a marriage" because she didn't have or want kids.
Mark 12:25
When the dead rise, they will neither marry nor be given in marriage; they will be like the angels in heaven.
Do you think when Jesus said marriage, in that verse, that he was talking about man, and a man?
Jesus didn't write any of the bible, so I don't know how you expect me to prove this. But this isn't a religious conversation per-say anyway.
I don't know about you, but after reading all the comments in the NT about marriage, and how they should work, I find nothing about man being with a man. It's pretty obvious, and to say different is just plain stupid.
but it's still not there. i'd think if it was so important, he'd have said it. but no. he only spoke about lust. and if jesus didn't say it, then jesus didn't say it. so you shouldn't say "jesus says one man, one woman" because he didn't.
You don't have to say anyting. It takes one man, and one woman to make a child, period.
That child should have a right to be raised by just that, a biological mother, and a biological father, who have given themselves in marriage and commited their lives to raising the children the so responsibly decided to have.
That is the ideal situation, and deviating from that, to me, just doesn't make sense. We are creating new ways of dealing with this, instead of fixing it directly. The more ways we create to deal with this, the more it will happen.
It is also why I am against abortion in most cases, not all. Abortion can be ok in certain cases.
children do have a right to be raised by their biological parents if those parents are willing and able. however. children do not have the right to be brought into this world. no couple has the responsibility to bone just so some unthought of kid can get a chance to come into this messed up world.
There is no incosistancey in my thinking, but that doesn't make my thinking correct either.
says you. except that you keep contradicting yourself. i'm sure i'll come across a few examples in this post. but that's your problem. i don't care if you're consistent. i just care that you're wrong.
Has there ever been a soceity in other than post modern times that allowed gay marriage?
in ancient china (especially the fujian province), ancient sparta, the island of thera, 2nd century rome, and i've heard rumors of secret but legal marriages in the middle ages. the cheyenne and souix indians (namely Yellow Head who became the third wife of chief Wagetote). and naturally, in sibera, they do it too. allegedly, emperors nero and diocletian married men not to mention trajan and hadrian. the guy with the wall. i bet it was a secret gay love palace with those amazing pict men in scotland <3. even the romans fell for men in kilts. it is possible that richard # the second was married to two men. at least in a civil sense. in the united states in the nineteenth century, there was the "boston marriage" in which two women pledged their lives to each other. whether sex had anything to do with this is naturally questionable and i'm sure no one then thought about it. the Azande of the congo region marry men. and in egypt's fifth dynasty, Khnumhotep and Niankhkhnum. and there's always the mayans. they also got drunk and high by using funnels to put substances into their anuses rather than drinking it. it's faster that way. that's hot. totally doing that at my next party. samurai had boyfriends, so did alexander the great. in the movie they called him his cousin i think. no wait. that was in troy. cause yeah. that guy had a boyfriend too. even some muslims dudes had boyfriends. Hafiz i-Shirazi and Abu Nuwas wrote about seducing boys they found attractive.
wow. that's a lot. even a few right here in "god's country". amazing.
(sources Androphile and Same-sex marriage - Wikipedia i know i rail about wiki but i don't really take this argument seriously. especially with this much evidence.) don't believe me? google history gay marriage and see what comes up. (turn on the adult filter if you like or you might not like what comes up {heh.}).
But then you've missed what I have been saying all along. My feelings on this subject came initially from within myself, and what I experienced in life. Religion only comfirmed it for me.
that's nice. so your very heart taught you to hate people who are different and religion just made you not feel guilty about it. there's a first, religion making someone NOT feel guilty.
Trust me, I am trying real hard here. I am a little upset with myself.
don't be upset with yourself. just find out if you're wrong or not. hey. if you're right then great. i like boys. i've only dated them. i'll deal. i'll keep my immoral thoughts about jessica alba in check.
Didn't you just say this?
marriage was never about children
And that legally children have nothing to do with marriage?
yes. i think it's an important point that marriage is not the thing that makes children possible. and did you know that single people can adopt children?
You weren't reading what I wrote. I said a loving responsible parent is what people desire.
I do not like my mother all that much. She cheated on my Dad, and my whole teenage life was spent listening to arguing, it was torture. I will not allow that to happen to my kids.
It hurt me tremdously, and goes against what my heart truely desired, to have a loving mother and father who are responsible about raising the children they choose to have.
um no. you said
I have always desired to be close to my natural parents, not some other parents, or 2 guys, or 2 girls.
Of course, if I had no other options, then I would take what I could get, and be grateful for it. This however does not change my desire to have a biological mother, and father who both care for me, and treat me with love.
you said you wanted your biological parents and that you'd settle for a loving and responsible parent if you really had to. (not to say that yours were not. that's your place not mine.) oh wait. you're saying loving and responsible biological parents. i see. and children they choose to have. so it's ok to choose not to have children by being loving and responsible and preventing them? well that knocks out how many pages of argument with schraf? and by using that word choose, you do realize that you have to accept abortion. it is a choice to not have a child you cannot care for (willing or able. either one.).
thus it follows...
You don't have to say anyting. It takes one man, and one woman to make a child, period.
yes. but one man plus one woman plus one condom (or three depending on the night <3) equals one man, one woman, no babies, and a cigarette.
but of course. sometimes it takes one man and two women to make a child since the first cannot provide a viable womb but has a viable egg or the other way round. sometimes it takes one man, one woman, and loads of creepy doctors to make a baby. sometimes it taks one man, one woman, and some other unknown guy's sperm to make a baby. freaks. all of them.
OMG, that is horrible. You can start another thread on that one, whew.
I don't think we should base our morals on technology either, since technology is never proven, and isn't guaranteed to stay here.
it's speculation, but not unfounded. what should we base our morals on? we can't base it on religion because it's never proven and it isn't guaranteed to stay here. we can't base our morals on tradition since it isn't proven and it obviously hasn't stayed here. how about founding our morals on something good and solid like the constitution or the declaration of independence? i mean. they're philosophical tradition so i guess they're out too. maybe we should just let W tell us what to do with out bodies. yeah. that's a great idea.
How would a person feel, really if they had to rely on technology to concieve a child?
I am sure that straight couples who turn to techology to have a baby, have feelings that need to be dealt with, in that they were not able to create one on their own.
I think I would feel pretty shitty about myself if I had to, and wonder what was wrong with me.
http://www.silverlininginfertilitysupport.co.uk/...ndex.html
ask them
it appears to be the same stuff that people who naturally miscarry go through. that's tough. but i guess if two loving and responsible parents really want to make a baby, then who am i to stand in their way just because i'm self-righteous in my perfectly functioning baby bag? well. that's a lie. my baby bag has serious issues.
Not a good answer at all. Nobody forcing anything here. That is an insufficient answer.
but you think that gay people shouldn't be gay. and if he wants to marry he should marry a woman. and naturally he's a man so he should combine with one woman to make at least one baby because if it can happen it should. cause m+w=b so therefore all m and all w should make b.
It's more about intention, than what is.
but what about
That child should have a right to be raised by just that, a biological mother, and a biological father, who have given themselves in marriage and commited their lives to raising the children the{y} so responsibly decided to have.
and
to have a loving mother and father who are responsible about raising the children they choose to have.
schraf is choosing not to have children because she is either unwilling or unable to care for them. i'd even venture that she is refraining from reproducing because she believes (like people in european countries) that the earth cannot support the number of people it has and that they feel they are being responsible to the children they might have in preventing them from starving to death in an overpopulated world. just because you don't take overpopulation as fact doesn't mean it isn't. and yet you call her selfish because she doesn't want to squeeze out a squalling brat that will die of starvation someday. oh sure our technology has allowed us to make more food than the earth would otherwise support but you just said
I don't think we should base our morals on technology either, since technology is never proven, and isn't guaranteed to stay here.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 94 by riVeRraT, posted 01-16-2006 8:03 AM riVeRraT has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 103 by nator, posted 01-16-2006 4:30 PM macaroniandcheese has replied
 Message 110 by riVeRraT, posted 01-16-2006 11:05 PM macaroniandcheese has replied

  
nator
Member (Idle past 2199 days)
Posts: 12961
From: Ann Arbor
Joined: 12-09-2001


Message 103 of 195 (279525)
01-16-2006 4:30 PM
Reply to: Message 102 by macaroniandcheese
01-16-2006 12:58 PM


reply to rat, springboarded from brenna's message
quote:
schraf is choosing not to have children because she is either unwilling or unable to care for them. i'd even venture that she is refraining from reproducing because she believes (like people in european countries) that the earth cannot support the number of people it has and that they feel they are being responsible to the children they might have in preventing them from starving to death in an overpopulated world. just because you don't take overpopulation as fact doesn't mean it isn't. and yet you call her selfish because she doesn't want to squeeze out a squalling brat that will die of starvation someday.
That's pretty much true, although I would not let my own child starve.
The idea is that if I do not bring even more mouths into the world to be overfed by the embarassing amount of food we consume in this country, there will be that much more food, water, clean air, etc., for some other people. If more people stopped having so many children, we wouldn't have so much pollution, environmental degradation, war, famine, disease, etc.
Overpopulation is what will kill us and the Earth, ultimately.
It is also true that there are some funky genetics in both my and zhimbo's side of the family and while no doctor has ever told us that we should definitely not have kids, it was definitely a factor in the choice to remain childless.
I have always, from the age of 10 or so, known and taken seriously the notion that that getting pregnant and raising a child will drastically, irreversably change my entire life forever. If I were to descide to bring another life into this world, it would be because I really wanted to do it. While both Zhimbo and I enjoy kids, neither one of us have had the burning desire to have and raise a child ourselves. Never once. So, we have been careful and always used birth control of some sort or another, although if I was to become pregnant by accident, I would probably raise it.
The point is, rat, that you have insulted me by calling me selfish for not having children.
You have insulted me for saying that my marriage shouldn't even be called a marriage because I don't have children.
You apparently do not have the ability to comprehend why such statements could be taken as insulting, and instead hide behind "I have a right to my opinion."
Your "opinions" regarding my marriage are bigoted, small-minded and extremely insulting.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 102 by macaroniandcheese, posted 01-16-2006 12:58 PM macaroniandcheese has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 104 by macaroniandcheese, posted 01-16-2006 5:21 PM nator has not replied

  
macaroniandcheese 
Suspended Member (Idle past 3957 days)
Posts: 4258
Joined: 05-24-2004


Message 104 of 195 (279533)
01-16-2006 5:21 PM
Reply to: Message 103 by nator
01-16-2006 4:30 PM


Re: reply to rat, springboarded from brenna's message
That's pretty much true, although I would not let my own child starve.
no i meant ultimate worst case world population scenario.
It is also true that there are some funky genetics in both my and zhimbo's side of the family and while no doctor has ever told us that we should definitely not have kids, it was definitely a factor in the choice to remain childless.
i'm totally on with that. maybe we shouldn't abort 'special' babies, but we shouldn't go out of our way to make them.
I have always, from the age of 10 or so, known and taken seriously the notion that that getting pregnant and raising a child will drastically, irreversably change my entire life forever. If I were to descide to bring another life into this world, it would be because I really wanted to do it. While both Zhimbo and I enjoy kids, neither one of us have had the burning desire to have and raise a child ourselves. Never once. So, we have been careful and always used birth control of some sort or another, although if I was to become pregnant by accident, I would probably raise it.
right on. see. that's being responsible. not having kids just cause that's what your body is capable of.

This message is a reply to:
 Message 103 by nator, posted 01-16-2006 4:30 PM nator has not replied

  
riVeRraT
Member (Idle past 445 days)
Posts: 5788
From: NY USA
Joined: 05-09-2004


Message 105 of 195 (279565)
01-16-2006 10:01 PM
Reply to: Message 90 by jar
01-15-2006 3:29 PM


Re: Yet you support oppression
As to your two questions, if I were either of the people addressed I'd justtell you it's none of your business. They are totally unrelated to the subject.
Well you finally said something that rubs me the wrong way.
It is totally related to the subject, unless you can prove otherwise. If you have been reading what I have been saying, you would know this.
It's a very deep topic, and emotions and attitudes need to be left out of it.
The only way we can discuss this rationally, is to be completely honest with each other.
If we can't agree on anything, we should at least agree to speak the truth in love with each other.
I am not here to hurt anybody, but seek the truth just like everyone else.
So should we make it legal to have multiple wives also?
Sure. Why not? Or in these economic times multiple husbands and even group marriages.
No comment.
Which also brings up a good point, and that is the evidence of what marriage is supposed to be today, according to Jesus.
Totally irrelevant to the discussion. If anything, such a consideration MUST be dropped from any discussion of the issue as illegal.
No it isn't really.
Just because Jesus's name comes up, doesn't make it religious. It's a discussion of the history of marriage. If the contract of marriage evolved from what Jesus taught us, then we should respect that.
You believe in Jesus, why wouldn't you consider that?
Yet you support oppressing others. Strange.
Congrats, you just pissed me off totally.
Do not complain that I am opressing others. If you were reading what I wrote on this subject, you would understand, that in my heart, I am not opressing anyone.
If I am ignorant, doesn't make me a bigot, or an opressor.
If you were truely a Christian, you wouldn't even judge me like that.
I get the feeling jar, that the Jesus you believe in, is totally different from the one I belive in.
In the last days, there will be followers of men.
Try re-reading everything I wrote in this thread with an open heart, and mind. And please take into consideration that you are insulting me when you call me an opressor.
If I call a chicken not a cow, am I opressing the chicken?
This message has been edited by riVeRraT, 01-16-2006 10:02 PM

This message is a reply to:
 Message 90 by jar, posted 01-15-2006 3:29 PM jar has replied

Replies to this message:
 Message 106 by jar, posted 01-16-2006 10:26 PM riVeRraT has replied

  
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