but O'Reilly claimed it was unecessary as he knows where his farts are at all times.
You know his motto: "The sh*t stops here"...
The plausibility of this scenario just increased from 0.6 to 0.7 because it is clear that Janet Jackson's nipple protector was not made of real gold.
That's "nipple shield" - it could hardly protect, as the item is worn by inserting a pierced nipple through the hole in the middle and securing it with a bar through the nipple... Does that affect your plausibility calculation? Don't forget to carry the 2.
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