Loony Of The Week

quote:

---

​

Need to use the restroom in Florida? Be sure to bring your birth certificate.

​

Florida state Rep. Frank Artiles just proposed a bill that would jail people for using the wrong restroom. This just isn't right.

​

This bill is designed to target transgender people but could also impact gender nonconforming people, people with disabilities, and parents.

---

quote:

---

BOISE, Idaho An Idaho lawmaker received a brief lesson on female anatomy after asking if a woman can swallow a small camera for doctors to conduct a remote gynecological exam.

​

Idaho lawmaker asks if woman can swallow camera for gynecological exam before medical abortion.

​

Dr. Julie Madsen, a physician who said she has provided various telemedicine services in Idaho, was testifying in opposition to the bill. She said some colonoscopy patients may swallow a small device to give doctors a closer look at parts of their colon.

​

"Can this same procedure then be done in a pregnancy? Swallowing a camera and helping the doctor determine what the situation is?" Barbieri asked.

​

Madsen replied that would be impossible because swallowed pills do not end up in the vagina.

​

"Fascinating. That makes sense," Barbieri said, amid the crowd's laughter.

---

quote:

---

’20-30 nuclear bombs will assure the job gets done,’ opinion piece on right-wing Israel National News site says

​

​

In the opinion article published Tuesday, the author claims that only through nuclear annihilation of Iran and Germany, with 20 or 30 nuclear bombs each, can Israelis prevent the state’s destruction.

​

If Israel does not walk in the ways of God’s Bible, author Chen Ben-Eliyahu wrote in Hebrew, it will receive a heavy punishment of near complete destruction and doom and only a few will be saved.

​

To combat this Israel must respond in kind, Ben-Eliyahu declared. To an existential threat we must respond with an existential threat, he wrote, not with speeches in Congress. We must make it clear to the Iranians that Israel will wipe out their nuclear program and Tehran and Isfahan as well.

​

If [an enemy] rises up to destroy you, rise earlier to destroy him: twenty, thirty nuclear bombs will do to assure the job gets done, he continued.

​

He also called on the Jewish people to remember its near destruction at the hands of the Nazis and exact revenge on Germany, now a staunch ally of Israel.

​

When the Messiah comes, Ben-Eliyahu wrote, Israel will reverse the Final Solution. Twenty, thirty atomic bombs on Berlin, Munich, Hamburg, Nuremberg, Cologne, Frankfurt, Stuttgart, Dresden, Dortmund and so on to assure the job gets done. And the land will be quiet for a thousand years, he wrote.

---

quote:

---

During a Q&A session with the former senator and presidential candidate, a woman whose media diet evidently consists of right-wing radio, nutty email chains, and Alex Jones' Infowars gave a long-winded rant that starts with well-worn old horses like questioning Obama's American citizenship and ends with a reference to a conspiracy theory about the president's alleged plot to nuke Charleston, South Carolina. ...

​

"Why is the Congress rolling over and letting this Communist dictator destroy my country? Y'all know what he is and I know what he is. I want him out of the White House; he's not a citizen; he could have been removed a long time ago...

​

Ted [Cruz?] told me I've got to wait for the next election. I don't think the country will be around for the next election. Obama tried to blow up a nuke in Charleston a few months ago! And the three admirals, and generals. He has totally destroyed our military. He's fired all the generals and all the admirals that said they wouldn't fire on the American people.

---

quote:

---

Claim: President Obama fired several military officers for disobeying his order to destroy Charleston as part of a "false flag" attack.

​

  FALSE  

​

Inquiring about a tactical nuke detonated underwater off the coast of SC during week ending 10-12-13. Obamba fires several generals for not detonating it closer to Charleston.

​

A shocking new Main Intelligence Directorate (GRU) report circulating in the Kremlin today states that President Barack Obama, while in a rage, ousted four of the United States top ranking military officers after they refused to detonate a nuclear device "in/near" Charleston, South Carolina this past week and, instead, exploded it off the Atlantic Coast.

​

According to this report, Strategic Missile Forces Command (SMF) notified both President Putin and the General Staff this past Tuesday (8 October) that at 01:58:11 GMT/UTC an atomic device was exploded in the seabed off the US Atlantic Ocean, barely 1,000 km (620 miles) from Charleston, causing a 4.5 magnitude earthquake measurement that SMF experts equate to being a 1-kiloton yield, which is equal to the power of 1,000 tons of TNT.

​

Origins: This October 2013 article about President Obama supposedly firing "four top ranking military officers" after they refused to detonate a nuclear device "in or near" Charleston, South Carolina, isn't a real news item. And neither is its follow-up which posited that Russia had successfully test-fired a ballistic missile in "direct response to President Barack Obama's attempt to destroy Charleston" as part of a "false flag attack."

​

In this case the actual news items from which the Sorcha Faal fantasy was spun were the mid-October 2013 announcements that Air Force Maj. Gen. Michael Carey and U.S. Vice Adm. Tim Giardina, both of whom oversaw the United States' arsenal of nuclear forces, had been relieved of their commands for "personal misbehavior."

---

quote:

---

A pregnant woman was attacked in Colorado last week by a stranger who stabbed her and extracted the fetus from her womb.

​

Gordon Klingenschmitt (R-CO) said on his program, Pray In Jesus Name, the attack was God’s curse upon America. And he said God is angry because of legalized abortion.

​

He described a passage from Hosea where God curses the people of Samaria for their rebellion by declaring that their little ones shall be dashed in pieces, and their pregnant women ripped open.

​

And the he tied the attack to abortion:

---

quote:

---

A 26-year-old pregnant woman in Colorado, spotting a Craigslist ad for baby clothes, drove to the home of the woman who placed the ad. When the pregnant woman arrived on Wednesday, she was beaten and stabbed by the 34-year-old woman who lives there, police said. The attacker then did something nearly unimaginable: She removed the fetus from her victim’s body, according to police in Longmont, Colo.

​

While the victim was left on the floor with a stab wound in her abdomen, Lane took the fetus to the hospital, claiming she had suffered a miscarriage, the Denver Post reported. The baby has since died. Lane is in police custody at Boulder County Jail, according to booking records.

---

quote:

---

Alaska State Superior Court Judge puts Oregon Sheriff on Notice in Bundy Standoff

​

A rather large number of you have written asking about the supposed Alaska State Judge who has weighed in on the side of the Bundy Militia. There's letter she wrote to the Harney County Sheriff floating around, but ...

​

Just ... goddamnit, Google, Snopes, all the knowledge of the world is at your fingertips. Please.

​

"Judge" Anna Von Rietz is not a judge anywhere but in her twisted little mind.

​

She's an obscure kook from Big Lake, Alaska, a wacky eclectic community of wealthy Anchorage commuters, Alaskan Bush People Wannabes of varying degrees of dedication, conspiracy theorists of every stripe, and a motley miscellaneous assortment of hygienically challenged hirsute rejects. Big Lake is a few miles north of Wasilla. Some of us think it should further north. The middle of the Arctic Ocean seems about right.

---

quote:

---

"Superior Court Judge
For the Continental united States"
Phone: 720-338-0394
Pursuant to the Constitution for the united States of America, duly convened and assembled in the Counties of Harney and Grant, in the State of Oregon, the Common Law Grand Jury composed of twenty five American Citizens [...]
do come together to see the facts presented in the case of: The pre-meditated Aggravated Murder in cold blood of the Rancher and Cowboy Mr. Robert LaVoy Finicum [...]
To ORDER all Militia in the area to search for, locate, and arrest those men involved in this ambush style attack on Mr. Robert LaVoy Finicum, together with, or independently of, the activities of the Sheriffs of Harney and/or Grant Counties. It is so ORDERED.

---