RAZD, my Father had Lymphoma and fought a valiant battle before going quietly one morning in May.
Looking back, I wondered if there was anything different that we could have done to have changed Dads destiny. Nutrition was one item that could have been improved (from my standpoint...I don't know how Dad would have felt) but he didn't eat very much due to the chemo and in retrospect, I believe that he would have been able to tolerate a few high quality nutritional drinks.
One thing I will mention that seems rather idealistic and not grounded in reality but which, to me, is and was quite a reality:
After he died, I sensed his absence in a profound way. There was no evidence that anything remained of him except memories. One summer day, years later, I was riding in a 7 day bicycle tour which went through some of the most beautiful areas of our Colorado Rocky Mountains. I was climbing a rather tough stretch of road near Leadville, and passed a sign that said 10,000 feet. Suddenly I sensed him right there with me, (he never rode bikes, either) and I began to smile and called out "Daddy"? "Daddy?" I had not thought of him every day or anything...but when I became reacquainted with his presence, I was overjoyed. It may have been entirely my own soul reuniting with old memories, but I certainly thought it to be more.
My question to you, RAZD, does not mean to sound negative or fatalistic. As feisty as you are, you probably will survive this cancer and will go on to do some wonderful things in the days that you have left on earth.
IF you did die, however, would you be scared of death or would you embrace it? Also, do you think that there is a chance that your soul would be anything more than a fond memory? (If this is too personal, you need not answer, but I am genuinely curious) Respectfully, Phat
BTW this is a question for all of us to contemplate eventually....so I am thinking of my answer as well.