one time i had an intestinal blockage that could have burst killing me. it was caused by low potassium that could have instead given me a heart attack.
another time i was freeclimbing in heavy winds.
and as a toddler i stopped breathing, but i don't remember that one.
there's lots of others, i'm terribly accident prone. i'm always waiting for the next time i almost die.
i didn't realize how serious it was until i was checking out of my four day stay in the hospital. i did wonder what made my mom drive into a hurricane to come be with me but whatever.
afterwards it kind of unsettled me. but not enough to really bother me. but now i try not to get too dehydrated again. well. not really
Now I have no fear of death, as everything I have is bonus. I do have to remind myself just how selfish this attitude is, wrt my family.
it's not selfish unless it makes you behave irresponsibly. no one is promised a tomorrow. that's what i've been living on for 5 years. do what makes you happy now, because you won't have more time.