read 1 Corinthians 13... read the Gospels... meditate on it day and night
It appears that this meditation had caused a short circuit and distorted your view of reality.
If you try hard enough, be it through meditation or something else, then you can convince yourself that anything is true. If you limit yourself to reading the New testament then you are missing out on so much in life.
Try not to take the Bible so seriously, it is, after all, just a collection of stories.
Best Wishes
Brian.
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Remembering events that never happened is a dangerous thing!
™ Version 4.2