schraf,
Sorry for getting cranky (again). To me, there's a big difference between [producing observations, hearsay, or facts] and producing those things along with judgements. I felt your tone was judgemental and, since I have tight ties to the Japanese culture, I am really sensitive to it.
Nobody considers it seedy or unseemly.
I think this is way too strong a statement. In the cities, among the younger generation, it seems to me pretty well accepted. However, since prostitution usually (as far as I know) runs via the mafia, it has the same "I don't want something to do with it" feeling associated with it. Furthermore, as far as I know, the older generation, and the people in the countryside, certainly do feel differently.
That is VERY different from the American view of prostitution.
The lines are not drawn by religion, but otherwise I don't see much of a difference. I know very few friends who are against prostitution except on religious grounds. The division in Japan may come from different ideals, but a division is there.
That isn't a soulmate. That's someone who is merely "compatible".
Well, let me get back to what I objected to:
schraf writes:
crash writes:
Sorry, I don't know much more than that. I'd say that, in the country where you can buy used schoolgirl's panties in vending machines (or used to, until they shut them down under violation of the Antiquities Act, of all things), all sexual bets are off.
The thing is, husbands and wives are not considered to be "soulmates" or anything there.
The implication (in my eyes) was that a lack of "soulmates" meant a focus on crazy sexual pleasures, promiscuity, chaos. THAT is what I objected to. Sorry if I read too much into it.
Women tend to have their friends, and men their work, and they don't really have that very close connection, and it isn't expected from marriage the way it is here these days.
I think that's a fair observation.
Like I said, I have discussed this with my Japanese friends and people who have lived in Japan for a long time.
I'd say, be wary of people who either are Americanized, are American, or who love American / English-speaking things. I find they tend to paint Japan with a very judgemental brush, and in a poor light, and to really idealize America. I don't like that, and I'm sensitive to it.
Sorry for taking it out by being a bit aggressive with you. AbE: and thanks for taking it in stride.
I am glad to share my experiences and observations from living in Tokyo, travelling around Japan, and knowing my girlfriend's family a bit. I'll try to do so more ... with ease next time.
Ben
This message has been edited by Ben, Wednesday, 2006/01/25 11:11 PM