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Author | Topic: Humor Strikes back | |||||||||||||||||||||||
Omnivorous Member Posts: 3991 From: Adirondackia Joined: Member Rating: 6.9 |
Thank you...made my day. But all you Baptists belong in the river, eh?
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Omnivorous Member Posts: 3991 From: Adirondackia Joined: Member Rating: 6.9 |
cavediver writes: One for you Berberry...It's my son's 2nd birthday today, and he has a wonderful wooden Noah's Ark with some great animals. We just noticed that both lions have manes??? My wife asked if this was an example of Gay Pride Sure--the ruff trade.
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Omnivorous Member Posts: 3991 From: Adirondackia Joined: Member Rating: 6.9 |
Phat writes: He was attempting to show how conditioned we have become to alarmists practicing junk science and spreading fear of everything in our environment. Funny, and more than faintly disturbing. That you could engage good intentions with unfamiliar nomenclature and misleading language hardly seems like a science project (maybe political science, more tenuously psychology), nor does it demonstrate any gullibility other than the student's. Perhaps he could have imbibed river water for a few months to show how alarmist environmentalists really are. Of course, if he had included the substances (heavy metals, PCBs, raw sewage, etc.) commonly found in our waterways, then the petition would in fact make sense. I'm trying to recall a real world case where warnings about a pollutant turned out to be alarmist and based on junk science. From there, I'd like to compare a list of authentic environmental toxins tolerated by law with alarmist, junk science ones...you know, just for laughs...
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Omnivorous Member Posts: 3991 From: Adirondackia Joined: Member Rating: 6.9 |
esp. love the "s*r"
"It's hard to admit the truth." -randman
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Omnivorous Member Posts: 3991 From: Adirondackia Joined: Member Rating: 6.9 |
RAZD writes: no you resemble Moose=Zippy's schizotypal twin?
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Omnivorous Member Posts: 3991 From: Adirondackia Joined: Member Rating: 6.9 |
Whoaaa! Made me reach for my 'Support Our Troops--Bring Them Home" magnetic ribbon...
And can you imagine that baby in a Stars 'n Stripes paint job?
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Omnivorous Member Posts: 3991 From: Adirondackia Joined: Member Rating: 6.9 |
Ahem.
As a rare, living ancestor, one who, in all humility, has demonstrated considerable survival capacity and fecundity, I would like to be the first to dedicate my body to this important new program (to have anyone else dedicating my body sounds vaguely alarming). Howver, I would like to point out that in the interest of maximal ancestor diversity, the program should begin with a cross-breeding cohort of descendants (not mine, of course--ick!). Once Moorhead, MN, has rounded up a sufficient number of nubile...er, suitable, descendants, my time is their time. In the name of this exciting new branch of creation science, no scarifice is too great, nor any labor too large. Just because as we dig a little deeper, our notions change does not mean the discoveries are not useful.--randman
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Omnivorous Member Posts: 3991 From: Adirondackia Joined: Member Rating: 6.9 |
Please fill out this questionaire and we'll get back to you.
I am true to my roots.
1. Do you reproduce sexually or asexually? 2. Are you male, female or hermaphrodite?
I'm a fast learner.
3. Are you a pure-bred ancestor?
Yes--only breeding was involved, no other method.
4. Do you lay eggs?
In several manners of speaking, I have laid eggs.
4. Does ancestry run in your family?
Positively stampedes--Jones clan, doncha know.
5. Do you object against incest?
Only if all men are not brothers.
6. How about bestiality?
Your place or mine?
7. Strangle sex?
I have never strangled anything but desire, and I regretted it. I hope you will take my contrition into account.
8. How many times a day must you be fed?
With copious hydration, I can forgo feeding for extended periods.
9. Do you require a stable, a dark cave or underwater2 sleeping quarters?
The dark cave option sounds attractive, but it is not a strict requirement: a fur-lined Jungle Room should suffice. Please consider a spinning ceiling-basket--the Dolly Dervish brand is best.
10. How many legs do you have? 3
No, not 3, just two at the moment: I am not an extremist. However, in case this is a trick question, I would like to point out that I do have a trick leg. Would you like to see it? If not, perhaps your avatar would? [Groucho_cigar_wag] Comments: Please keep me in mind. While I am not as good as I once was, I'm as good once as I ever was. References--if desired. [\Groucho_cigar_wag]
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Omnivorous Member Posts: 3991 From: Adirondackia Joined: Member Rating: 6.9 |
That would amount to... polygamy! Good for you!
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Omnivorous Member Posts: 3991 From: Adirondackia Joined: Member Rating: 6.9 |
Ah, references. Yes, excellent. Well, just one question really, and then it should be in the bag: those eggs you mentioned, can they erm... sort of, attest that they erm... got laid by you? Why, yes, of course: those eggs were changed, changed utterly. A terrible beauty was born (though the tax exemption helped ease the terror just a bit).
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Omnivorous Member Posts: 3991 From: Adirondackia Joined: Member Rating: 6.9 |
2. Are you male, female or hermaphrodite? female Further info required: nubile? (If yes, notify Omivorous.) Say n'more: if not nubile, she is clearly sassy--close enough for research work. This message has been edited by Omnivorous, 12-09-2005 06:11 PM
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Omnivorous Member Posts: 3991 From: Adirondackia Joined: Member Rating: 6.9 |
Condie wishes she fill a spandex suit that full...the 'tude is about right, tho'...
Save lives! Click here! Join the World Community Grid with Team EvC!
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Omnivorous Member Posts: 3991 From: Adirondackia Joined: Member Rating: 6.9 |
What would Jesus drink?
For those special psalm session tete-a-tetes, ask for Song of Solomon Beaujolais...for that guilt-free heavenly taste.* *For a limited time only, a free bottle of Apocalyptic Sours with every purchase. This message has been edited by Omnivorous, 12-20-2005 02:42 PM Save lives! Click here! Join the World Community Grid with Team EvC!
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Omnivorous Member Posts: 3991 From: Adirondackia Joined: Member Rating: 6.9 |
I see that in his right shade lens, Hillary is laughing at him. But I can't make out the image in the other lens...do you know who it is? "Dost thou think because thou art virtuous there shall be no more cakes and ale?" -Sir Toby Belch, Twelfth Night Save lives! Click here!Join the World Community Grid with Team EvC! ---------------------------------------
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Omnivorous Member Posts: 3991 From: Adirondackia Joined: Member Rating: 6.9 |
Ah. So it's a Good and Evil, Beauty and the Beast, Yin/Yang kinda thing...
"Dost thou think because thou art virtuous there shall be no more cakes and ale?" -Sir Toby Belch, Twelfth Night Save lives! Click here!Join the World Community Grid with Team EvC! ---------------------------------------
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