I simply cannot see how a choice can be neither predetermined nor random. Consequently I cannot see how there can be such a thing as free will, at least by my definition.
That's an interesting proposition and one that CS Lewis has touched upon in a latter chapter of "Mere Christianity." His discourse made alot of sense and it nimbly gets around the conundrum of determinism and freewill. As you've shared, both seem to have some fundamental flaw. It almost seems like there are elements of both, and would have to be, without having them cancel each other out. I wish I could remember off-hand how the argument was presented.
You might respond "well, how do you know that you are guided by subconcious preferences? Thats just a guess on your part because unconcious preferences are necessarily hidden." Alternatively you might say "how do you know that your prefences are sometimes guided by true randomness?" I agree that its speculative, but to me it seems more probable because for free will to work, it seems as though a third, unknown element is introduced into the equation that is neither random nor predetermined. To me this element seems impossible.
Yeah, but all these arguments are made for beings bound by a timeline. I wouldn't say we are bound by our preferences. Indeed, even if we were, surely we arrived at those preferences testing out our freewill. For instance, I'm not too particular on vanilla or chocolate. Either will do depending on my mood. But I am not a fan of strawberry ice cream at all. The only way I arrived at my decision is by testing all three of my own volition. My preference may determine future outcomes, but that does not mean that I didn't make a meaningful choice since the inception of my original choice.
And if God is, then all of our actions are happening now, have yet to happen, and already passed, all at once. And there may be infinite choices for us, things that could have been had we chosen differently. This bit is pure speculation, but it makes some sense philosophically.
"There is not in all America a more dangerous trait than the deification of mere smartness unaccompanied by any sense of moral responsibility." -Theodore Roosevelt