Conflict of interests

Ruby - I do agree, and have had similar experiences. I became a Born Again believer type in my late teens, and stopped believing in my late 20’s. The reason I turned to the Dark Side is because I was challenged by a non believer to actually read about the subject matter I was disputing, namely evolution.
I read Origin and some other contemporary books, and although I did not have a total understanding of this complex issue, I did learn that evolution did not in any way discount the existence of God.
Slowly, I made the pilgrimage to Theistic Evolutionist, and then eventually I became Agnostic, then Atheist. I learned to, as you put it, to question everything I used to (and still did/do) believe. It was most beneficial.
Now, throughout these transitions, I was never sad or regretful that I had lost something; rather, I was unhappy as a Christian (that had a great deal to do with the company I kept and things I used to believe; (was on the fringe in that I believed in SRA, MPD. The whole Bob Larson, Frank Peretti and Mike Warnke crowd)) and discovered that I was incredibly happy and fulfilled as a non believer.
A few months ago, something happened to me that rekindled my belief. I won’t bore you with the details, and they will probably not make any sense anyway.
Some users on this board have been instrumental in helping me believe again; Jar, Truth Lover, Arachnophilia to name a few.

Thanks, but I do not feel that I am 'back', because I do not believe the way that I used to believe. I do not believe in the divinity of Christ, therefore by definition, I am not a Christian anymore.Really, the only thing I 'get out of it", is a hope; I do not know with any degree of certainy that there is a heaven (I do not believe in a hell), but I hope that there is. In addition, I can say that I only 'feel' that there is a God, and although I do believe, I am unsure of His/Her/It's participation in our lives. I can offer no proof or evidence, (nor would I want to, since I think that faith is personal) but (and this is only my opinion) the alternative is worse.