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Author | Topic: Dating services and foreign women | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
foreveryoung Member (Idle past 612 days) Posts: 921 Joined: |
I am mainly taking about onifre, Dr Adequate and Theodoric. I may have forgotten a few others but I am sure of those three.
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jar Member (Idle past 424 days) Posts: 34026 From: Texas!! Joined:
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I seriously doubt they hate you.
Anyone so limited that they can only spell a word one way is severely handicapped!
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Coyote Member (Idle past 2136 days) Posts: 6117 Joined:
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You're looking at the world from the bottom of the mountain.
Folks don't hate you. A number of folks disagree with your ideas, while others agree with you. The solution is to get out and mingle, find the places that are comfortable for you. You're young. You will figure things out, no problem.
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nwr Member Posts: 6412 From: Geneva, Illinois Joined: Member Rating: 4.5
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It's hard to have a sense of humor when most of the people hate you and everything you stand for.
I agree with jar. I seriously doubt that anybody here hates you. Yes, some of us disagree with some of your ideas. We perhaps think some of them are laughably absurd. But it doesn't mean that we hate you. We would probably all defend your right to have views that we think absurd. Yes, I'm sure it's not fun being the target of jokes and criticism. But try to not take it personally. Oh, and best wishes for the new year. And I really do mean that.Fundamentalism - the anti-American, anti-Christian branch of American Christianity
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Jazzns Member (Idle past 3941 days) Posts: 2657 From: A Better America Joined:
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If it is offered, you should totally take ballroom dancing. You learn lots of different styles of dancing which makes it interesting. There is usually a shortage of guys. You generally have to rotate partners often allowing you to meet everybody. Here are some tricks though.
1. Don't be that creepy guy who is there only to meet women. The girls are NOT there to only meet guys. They are there to learn how to dance, that should be your goal too. 2. Be a good and solid dancer and most importantly, leader! For the girls, half of the trouble comes from learning the dances and the other half is from dealing with shitty leaders. Practice the steps outside of class and come to class to work on your leadership and partnering skills. If you are the guy who makes their learning easy, you will be the one they want to practice with. 3. Make friends! In my life, the best girlfriends were friends first and nothing makes friends better than a shared new interest....like ballroom dancing!If we long for our planet to be important, there is something we can do about it. We make our world significant by the courage of our questions and by the depth of our answers. --Carl Sagan
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dwise1 Member Posts: 5952 Joined: Member Rating: 5.2 |
I would add to that that there is more than just college PE classes to learn from. For example, I started with an after-work class in salsa that my company supported, but then we took some classes through our city's parks and recreation program. After, it was through dance studios, though some teachers will also teach at dance venues.
When we first started, we had no idea where to find classes; we just happened to stumble upon the first two. We found some through word-of-mouth from friends, while I found some through Google. In our area (Orange County, Calif), there's a website that lists each week what dance classes and events there are here. There could be something similar in your area, but you would need to look or ask around. The dancers in the area form communities that are good sources for information, so the challenge is to make those first contacts. Of course, you should be able to find local dance studios more easily, but it's caveat empor. Some chain studios have a reputation for trying to make as much money off of their students as possible through questionable practices. That tends to be mainly ballroom studios and Arthur Murray comes to mind, though I have no personal experience with them. One aspect of ballroom is proper technique and serious students work on preparing for competitions -- immediately grooming you to compete is one of those practices. Furthermore, you will have group classes and private classes. It's mainly the group classes that I'm thinking of in recommending this route for you, because that is where you will be in a more social setting. However, privates can be very beneficial and even necessary for you to work on problems you have with technique. For example, one problem that students have in the beginning is connection and for leaders is how to use connection to lead. I was lucky to have had training in Aikido which had already taught me the nature and feel of that connection and experience in leading someone else with my own body's movement rather than by trying to muscle them around. But most new leaders do not have the benefit of such previous training and need some personal time with the instructor to begin to learn it. So you need to balance between groups and privates according to your needs and your goals. Prices will vary, but here it's $12 - $15 for a single 1-hr group class, $40 - $50 for a 4-6 week series of group classes (1-hr each), and $75 for a 1-hr private (though if you bring another person in then the cost remains the same and you two can usually split it). As I said, technique is very important in ballroom dancing. Yes, you can learn about ten dances, but for most of them technique can be very important, though you could get by in a casual social environment. Hence, privates are more important in ballroom. In swing, country, and salsa, technique is not as critical, though you're learning fewer dances. And another consideration could be what kind of music you already like. Of course, you could just learn them all (as I have), but right now you're thinking about the first one. Plus, the decision might end up being based on what is available in your area. Now, if you were to just go out doing free-style (dancing in the vicinity of your "partner" as started happening in the late 60's) and that would get you into a social life. The reason I recommend partner dancing is that group classes provide you with a safe social environment should be much less stressful than going to a dance by yourself not knowing anybody and being afraid to ask anybody to dance, made worse by not knowing how to dance, etc. In a group class, you automatically have a partner and will rotate partners regularly. In a group class, you will have the opportunity to meet others. There are group classes for partner dances, but I have yet to see one for free-style -- I'll usually fake free-style by using salsa footwork, but then isn't free-style just faking it anyway? Plus, in partner dancing you're actually interacting with your partner.
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onifre Member (Idle past 2980 days) Posts: 4854 From: Dark Side of the Moon Joined:
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I am mainly taking about onifre, Dr Adequate and Theodoric. I don't hate you, dude. When you send me these private messages I just find it funny that you take this so serious, so I fuck with you. It has I guess given you the wrong impression. Mostly because you lack a sense of humor. - Oni
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Dr Adequate Member (Idle past 314 days) Posts: 16113 Joined:
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I am mainly taking about onifre, Dr Adequate and Theodoric. I may have forgotten a few others but I am sure of those three. I don't hate you and I only hate about 37% of what you stand for.
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Theodoric Member Posts: 9201 From: Northwest, WI, USA Joined: Member Rating: 3.2 |
I am mainly taking about onifre, Dr Adequate and Theodoric. I don't think enough about anyone here to hate them. If someone says something I think is stupid I am going to tell them it is stupid. You really need to grow a spine. Edited by Theodoric, : No reason given.Facts don't lie or have an agenda. Facts are just facts "God did it" is not an argument. It is an excuse for intellectual laziness.
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AZPaul3 Member Posts: 8564 From: Phoenix Joined: Member Rating: 4.7
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I may have forgotten a few others but I am sure of those three. OK so we have those three you say hate you and we have seen their responses. Onifre doesn't hate you, you just don't have a sense of humor so he likes to fuck with you. Kind of the dark side of a comedian. Dr. A doesn't hate you, just 37% of your ideas. You're lucky, by the way, it's usually higher. And Theo doesn't hate you, he says he doesn't think enough about any of us to care either way. You think you have it bad and here he just admitted to being an internet sociopath, sorta. Each one thinks he has reasons for why they think that you think that they hate you. OK, read it through my eyes and it actually doesn't make much sense either but you get my drift. What we do not have is why you say these guys hate you. Are they right? Do you not have a sense of humor? Is disagreement with 37% of your ideas your definition of hateful behavior? Is your phenotype missing some number of spinal vertebrae? Or Are there other reasons, yet to be revealed? A series of slights unnoticed by others? Why do you think you are hated? It can be hard to reveal oneself to a bunch of strangers in a forum with which one is already unhappy. But the catharsis can be constructive and the anonymity of the internet can make the soul baring less wrenching. I for one will listen. I know others will as well. Ready? Edited by AZPaul3, : none of your damn business Edited by AZPaul3, : Stop snooping! My reasons are my own. Go away!
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Theodoric Member Posts: 9201 From: Northwest, WI, USA Joined: Member Rating: 3.2
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here he just admitted to being an internet sociopath, sorta. I'm getting a little misty. That is the nicest thing I have heard said about me in a long time around here.Facts don't lie or have an agenda. Facts are just facts "God did it" is not an argument. It is an excuse for intellectual laziness.
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foreveryoung Member (Idle past 612 days) Posts: 921 Joined: |
I know I don't have a sense of humor. My roommate recently threw a party for me as I was going out of town for two weeks. She knows that I have ZERO social skills and it was an effort to help me improve. She took several pictures at the party and everyone managed to be able to smile for the camera except for ME. I mean I tried as hard as I could and even when I tried to force a smile, it still showed up as a frown on the picture. My lack of a sense of humor and my desire to have one is one of the reasons for my recurrent depression states. I try positive thinking when negative thoughts enter, but I guess it takes a long time to convince your brain that it is thinking inaccurately about reality. One person said the main thing that is keeping from having a sense of humor is my lack of the ability to say "I don't give a shit", and really mean it. The only time when I am able to say that phrase is when I have had a few drinks. I recognize that is a dangerous place to be in and so I don't take the easy way out on that problem. I take everything very personally and even take things that were never meant to insult personally. It's enough to make you want to slit your wrists, but I haven't because I still hold out hope.
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AZPaul3 Member Posts: 8564 From: Phoenix Joined: Member Rating: 4.7 |
She took several pictures at the party and everyone managed to be able to smile for the camera except for ME. I mean I tried as hard as I could and even when I tried to force a smile, it still showed up as a frown on the picture. What was going on in your head? What were you thinking about in front of the camera? Some people are just camera shy. Don't think they do well on film. Or is there something deeper in there eating at you?
The only time when I am able to say that phrase is when I have had a few drinks. I recognize that is a dangerous place to be in and so I don't take the easy way out on that problem. Good. A sane man. I think you're more stable than you want to believe.
I take everything very personally and even take things that were never meant to insult personally. When this happens do you know inside there is no insult intended ? Don't want to pry (well actually yah I do) care to relate an example? That's enough for now.
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foreveryoung Member (Idle past 612 days) Posts: 921 Joined: |
What was going on in your head? What were you thinking about in front of the camera? Some people are just camera shy. Don't think they do well on film. Or is there something deeper in there eating at you? In my conscious mind, I was thinking I have to force something that just isn't there. I am not able to smile period, camera or not, except for very rare occasions. The reason? It is subconscious and developed over time I assume. I am a very dark person and have been for a very long time.
Good. A sane man. I think you're more stable than you want to believe. I am stable; I just feel desperate sometimes, like there is no light at the end of the tunnel.
When this happens do you know inside there is no insult intended ? Don't want to pry (well actually yah I do) care to relate an example? No. I don't know there was no insult intended as was just revealed on this very thread. It is only after someone reveals the irrationality of my thoughts that I realize that there was no insult intended. I always assume people think the worst of me in any situation.
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New Cat's Eye Inactive Member |
What was going on in your head? What were you thinking about in front of the camera? Some people are just camera shy. Don't think they do well on film. Or is there something deeper in there eating at you?
In my conscious mind, I was thinking I have to force something that just isn't there. I am not able to smile period, camera or not, except for very rare occasions. The reason? It is subconscious and developed over time I assume. I am a very dark person and have been for a very long time.
Good. A sane man. I think you're more stable than you want to believe. I am stable; I just feel desperate sometimes, like there is no light at the end of the tunnel. Sometimes light comes with maturity. I've been in dark places that I ended up growing out of. I've found that simply loving your neighbor helps.
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